Everyone Wants Their Fifteen Minutes
by dsfeo78
Summary: AU Rizzles story. Jane works through unwanted press attention, her true feelings for Maura and a series of murders that may be connected. Not linked to any of my previous stories.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N So another story from the crazy mind of me. I hope you will enjoy. This is an AU story unrelated to any of my other stories and will definitely be a Rizzles story. Plus, this one will be less angsty than my last one. Figured it was time for a lighter piece. Which isn't to say I won't play with the crime part….or the cliffhangers. You all know I can't help that part of me.**

**But- as always….daily updates are a DSFEO78 guarantee so I always decide that lets me play with the cliffies a bit more.**

**Please enjoy…and I do welcome any and all reviews or feedback. The good and the bad…**

**Disclaimer: The usual…don't own them. Don't make money off of them. Just like to take the ladies for a ride.**

Chapter 1

All Detective Jane Rizzoli wanted was a cup of coffee. It was a simple request. It was her comfort beverage. Actually if she was honest with herself it was her all-purpose beverage. Tired? Get a cup of coffee. Cold? Get a cup of coffee. Aggravated? Get a cup of coffee. Bored? Get a cup of coffee. Coffee was very much a part of the detective's life.

So it shouldn't have surprised anyone that Jane was standing in line for her second cup of coffee that morning. It was a daily occurrence. Even the location was typical. Jane's first cup of coffee was always at home. That was the routine. The only thing that varied on the first cup was location and quality. And both of those variances were linked to one factor: Chief Medical Examiner Maura Isles. Jane's best friend.

If Jane was home her coffee was usually instant. Not the greatest for quality but it worked in a pinch and delivered the necessary caffeine to get her up and out of the house. If Jane was at her place but Maura was over then the coffee improved marginally to be at least brewed. Maura refused to drink instant.

On mornings Jane awoke in the house of the coffee snob she called her friend her first cup of coffee was an elaborate concoction. It was never normal coffee. It was espresso. Or cappuccino. Or some attempt at an iced latte or frappe. On the rare occasion that it was 'just' coffee it was some exotic roast or blend of beans usually something Jane could not pronounce. Maura Isles was a coffee snob. But Jane put up with her anyway.

First cup of coffee notwithstanding, Jane's second cup of coffee each day was the same. Same order. Same coffee shop. Same everything. The only variation to this would be time of day which was influenced entirely by when her job forced her to be awake and interacting with the world and whether she was ordering coffee for others. Sometimes it was a cup for Maura. Sometimes cups for her partners in crime detection, Sergeant Vince Korsak and Detective Barry Frost. Occasionally even a cup for her mother Angela or her brother Frankie.

On this morning, Jane was in line at her coffee place. She needed her second cup. She was getting coffee for the ME too. Both ladies were pulled from bed at 4 am to respond to a body found in an alley in the Back Bay. It was now 7:28 and Jane had processed a crime scene and canvassed the neighborhood on just one cup of instant. Three and a half hours. She needed her coffee. She needed the line to start moving faster.

The line moved forward for the first time in a few minutes and that seemed to appease the mildly impatient detective. Two more people and it would be her turn. Salvation was coming in the form of magical black liquid. She was a slave to coffee and it was a vice she willing fell victim to.

She was reaching for her phone to send a text message to Maura. It was going to be a very well crafted, smart ass observation about how she was being denied her coffee due some evil conspiracy targeting brilliant law enforcement officers like herself. It was going to make Maura smile, possibly even laugh. But Jane never got a chance to type that text.

Before she could start to type she saw him. Just out of the corner of her eye. Or more precisely she saw it. When she would get asked later that day she wouldn't be able explain exactly what the 'it' was that she reacted to. The best she would be able to identify was the look the guy had on his face when she first noticed him.

It was a cop thing. Something she learned after years of walking a beat and investigating cases. She always looked at people's faces. Whenever she walked into a business: restaurants, gas stations or shopping center. Anywhere really. She always looked at the faces of the people around her. Sometimes she thought it was her trying to find that hidden criminal. That face from a BOLO. But sometimes she just wanted to make sure the people around her were ok. She routinely saw sadness. She routinely saw happiness. She rarely, however, saw danger.

And he was danger. It radiated from him. The second Jane took a closer look at the man that had just walked into the coffee shop she knew there was about to be a situation. She had seen that particular look a few too many times in her career. This was going to be an issue.

She didn't need to size up the shop. She knew the exact head count that was inside. Again, it was a cop thing. She knew the exits and that the emergency exit in the far right corner was partially blocked by a cart that was stacked full of supplies. She knew there was easier access out through the back room off to the left. So she understood what would happen if this escalated to a complete panic.

The man didn't make an immediate move. This surprised Jane for a minute but she assumed that he was working up the nerve to carry out his plan. As stealthly as she could she managed to step out of line and pull out her cellphone. Keeping an eye on the now potential suspect Jane started to type.

_Need officers at coffee shop now...roll silent! Potential robbery/hostage situation in progress. J_

She sent the text to Frost, Korsak and Cavanaugh. They knew her coffee routine and would know which coffee shop she meant.

Jane glared at the man out of the side of her eye. He was lurking by the front door and was visibly nervous. When he turned to look out the door she caught a glimpse of a gun concealed in the small of his back. She wasn't wrong about this guy. It wasn't going to be if he did something but when he tried something.

He seemed to not be paying attention to the specific actions of the patrons in the coffee shop. Jane used this to her advantage. She looked at her phone and saw replies from all three detectives.

_We are coming- K  
Description? C  
Can you get people out? F_

She typed another text to the three.

_Armed. Has not made move. Approx 20, 5'10" 160 lbs, blue jeans, white sneakers, red t-shirt untucked, gray hoodie sweatshirt, brown hair. J_

She shifted over towards a rack of gift items to get a better view of the suspect. He still lingered at the front of the store. His attention was divided between the front door and the action at the cash register. Jane noticed his was getting jumpier and she was pretty sure he was about to start whatever he had intended to try very soon.

She checked her phone again.

_2 minutes out w/ some officers- C  
Can you disarm him? F  
Is the entrance blocked? K_

_He's getting nervous. I think I can get closer. Front door is accessible. J_

Jane slowly worked her way closer to the suspect. There were enough gift items and merchandise racks that she would continue her ruse of just shopping all the while closing the distance between them. She felt her phone vibrate again and as much as she wanted to look at it she was getting concerned that if she let her attention waver she would miss her chance to react. So she chose not to read the last texts from the guys.

And just like before, she saw it on his face. The instant he decided to go ahead with his plan his face once again gave him away. And Jane once again was the one to see it. In her head she knew the officers and her partners were still thirty seconds out. In a situation like the one she now knew was coming Jane understood that thirty seconds was a lifetime. She knew it was up to her to intercede.

And intercede she did. In a matter of seconds Jane was able to close the remaining distance between herself and the suspect. She knew she needed to avoid having to draw her gun unless she absolutely had to if she wanted to protect the patrons in the shop from getting injured in a cross fire.

The suspect started to move forward towards the cash register while his hand started to make a move towards the gun tucked into the small of his back. When asked later he would admit that he had no idea where Jane came from. His instincts and peripheral vision was not as acute as Jane's. He never saw her coming.

Before he could reach the handle of his gun Jane was tackling him to the ground. They rolled around for just a second but he really didn't put up too much of a fight having been completely surprised by Jane's tackle. Jane ended up on top of him but hadn't pinned down his arms fast enough. He had a free hand and was able to connect a punch to the square of Jane's jaw.

_God damn it!_

Recovering faster than the suspect was expecting Jane struck back and connected with a right cross of her own connecting just as effectively to the suspect's chin. It stunned him enough for her to gain control of his extremities. Jane managed to subdue the suspect at the same moment three Boston officers entered with guns drawn. Two of the officers assisted the detective with the suspect. Jane moved aside and let them cuff the young man. Her hand went up instinctually to the throbbing radiating from her jaw.

Cavanaugh, Korsak and Frost followed right behind the officers but it was over. And over before anything really began. Not a shot was fired.

The suspect was cuffed and searched. Two hand guns and a knife were removed from his person. He was lead out of the coffee shop and it wasn't until Jane saw him vacate the building entirely that she took a minute to look around.

There had been twelve patrons and three staff members in the coffee shop at the moment Jane confronted the would-be criminal. She suddenly felt fifteen sets of eyes focusing on her. Most had no idea what had happened. Not at first. But it was slowly starting to sink in. Especially as the officers continued to walk in and out of the coffee shop. All fifteen people wouldn't know exactly what happened but all fifteen were suddenly aware of the fact that the beautiful Boston detective had just stopped something bad from happening. And all fifteen faces smiled at Jane as she let her eyes scan the crowd to reassure herself that no one was injured.

In the midst of the chaos she inched towards the cash register counter. She looked at the girl behind the counter.

"Jessica, can I get my usual?" She really needed coffee.

Still a bit shocked Jessica nodded. "Ummm...of course Detective. Right away."


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

"Jane, you are ok?" Cavanaugh asked as Jane had stepped away from the counter and surveyed the scene.

"I'm fine," she said almost out of an instinct more than an actual assessment. She took a second to do a mental assessment and she was ok. She felt the throbbing pain from her jaw where the suspect had hit her in the scuffle but otherwise she was physically fine. The adrenalin was still racing through her system and she knew she hands were a little shaky. But she was fine.

"Excellent work Rizzoli," said Cavanaugh as he approached. "What happened?"

"I was in line for coffee," Jane started. At that moment Jessica walked up to Jane with the cup of coffee she had ordered. She handed it to Jane. Jane couldn't help but notice that Jessica's hands were shaking too. Jane tried to smile at Jessica hoping it would help put her at ease. She took a sip of the coffee she had so desired before she continued. "I noticed the suspect when he walked in. He seemed jumpy. I can't really place exactly what it was that drew my attention to him but I just got the sense that he was up to no good."

Cavanaugh understood that. He nodded his head. "Did he say anything at all?"

"No Sir. He stayed close to the front door. He never interacted with anyone here. I was able to text you three and move my way closer to him without tipping him off. His overall awareness was pretty poor. I saw the gun at the base of his back and when he started to make his move and reach for the gun I tackled him. He got one good shot to my jaw but I got him back and had him under control when the officers entered and finished the arrest."

"Nice work Jane," Korsak stated with a hint of pride.

"It was nothing. Just lucky. I just happened to see his face. Something was just off with him."

Korsak looked at Jane's face and saw the welt where she got hit. She had a slight cut on her lip. "You should get that checked out Jane." Even as he said it he knew what her response was about to be.

Jane shook her head. "I'm fine. It just stings a little. Sir, can I go back to the station? I'm going to be filing reports on this for the rest of the day." Jane was done here and just wanted to get back to the station.

"Sure, sure. Korsak and I will stay here and wrap all of this up. You head back with Frost and start the reports."

Jane simply nodded. She turned to Frost who had already heard what Cavanaugh said and was making his way towards the front entrance of the coffee shop. Jane and Frost walked out and Jane was surprised that there were already members of the press surrounding the coffee shop.

In truth, this was what Jane was trying to avoid. She knew that word would get out about what had occurred in the shop. She was trying to avoid any run-ins with the press. Looking around it was clear that she had failed to do that. Jane counted no less than eight reporters standing outside of the makeshift barrier.

"Detective! Detective!"  
"Detective what happened?"  
"Detective! Is it true that a robbery attempt was stopped?"  
"Detective what was your involvement in what happened here?"

Jane's disdain for the press started years ago. She barely tolerated that they had a job to do. What she hated was how they went about doing that job. The harassment. The stalking. The invasion of personal privacy. All under some umbrella of a claim that the 'people have the right to know'. Jane always thought that the people also had a right to know what some members of the press did to obtain that information they claimed the public needed to know.

Jane used to make eye contact and answer all the reporter's questions with some form of 'No comment' but after her years of dealing with the press and incidents involving Hoyt, the station attack or even Doyle she no longer even tried to do that. She avoided eye contact and didn't bother to respond. They could interpret that any way they wanted. They would anyway no matter what she did.

Frost led Jane through the crowd and to his car. They started out back towards the station.

"Are you ok?" he finally had his chance to ask her.

"I'm fine. Jaw hurts a little but it's nothing a little ice and an aspirin won't fix."

Frost nodded. That would be the one and only time he asked her. She would take his head off if he tried asking again. "That was a heads up move Jane."

Jane stared out the window of the moving car. She nodded. "Just lucky."

Frost glanced over at his partner. She never ceased to amaze him. He had watched her handle situations that would have broken any other person he had ever known including himself. But with everything she had been through she never quit. After each attack, each injury she was back at work faster usually than the doctors even allowed. Jane had stood toe to toe with real evil and she had won. Frost was all but convinced she was the only one who was capable of winning.

She was the best detective he had ever seen. There were nights he went home wondering how he got lucky enough to have her as a partner. Her instincts at crime scenes or in interrogations were a thing to admire. She picked up on everything. Small clues or details that others would overlook or fail to connect. She saw everything. She processed everything. She reacted to everything. And today was just another shining example how the world benefitted from the gift that was Jane Rizzoli.

The thing that impressed Frost most about Jane was her selflessness. He knew plenty of cops who wanted the glory. Wanted the attention. Wanted to be the guy at the Dirty Robber bragging about a collar or a take down. But not Jane. She never asked for recognition. She never wanted awards or accolades. In fact she shied away from all of that. And don't ever be the one who tried to call her a hero. She never took credit for the good work that she did. Everything she did she considered to be a part of her job.

So Frost wasn't surprised that Jane didn't stop to speak to the reporters. He even understood that was what she was trying to avoid by leaving the coffee shop early. She hated paperwork. She just hated the press more. He understood that she was already concerned that her role in what had happened inside that shop was going to be sensationalized on the evening news. He knew it was going to be the last thing Jane wanted to happen. Frost had taken Jane's lead on how to handle the press early on in his time with her. He had no time for them either.

They returned to the station and headed for the elevators. Frost was in no way surprised when Jane hit both the Up and Down buttons. He knew he was headed up. He knew she was going down. Jane was headed to the morgue to see Maura.

Her elevator arrived first. She turned to Frost. "I'll be up in a minute. Maura will have ice."

Frost nodded. "Take your time Jane." As for as Frost was concerned Jane had earned the right to hang out with Maura for the rest of the day if that was what she wanted to do.

She got into the elevator and hit the button for the morgue. As the car lowered her to her desired floor she finally realized that while she asked for her cup of coffee she failed to get a cup for Maura which had been her original intention. She felt bad about that. The elevator stopped and Jane walked to the lab first. She looked into the window and didn't see the ME so she turned and headed to Maura's office.

Jane got to the office door and peaked in. Maura was sitting behind her desk looking over a report. Jane gently knocked on the door to get Maura's attention. The knock made her look up and she immediately smiled when she saw it was Jane.

"Jane," she said with the grin getting wider on her face. "Why are you knocking?" She was used to the detective just walking through the door.

"You looked focused. I didn't want to startle you," she answered as she walked closer to the desk. "I'm sorry I didn't get you a cup of coffee. I was going to bring you a cup."

Maura, who had no idea what had just transpired at the coffee shop, was a bit surprised by the guilt she heard in Jane's tone. It was just a cup of coffee. She set down her report and looked up at Jane. "That's ok. I can get a cup upstairs. What..." she paused and really looked at Jane, "what on Earth happened to you?" She saw the cut lip and red welt on Jane's jaw.

"Nothing. Just took a shot to the jaw. Do you have an ice pack and maybe an aspirin?"

Maura was up from behind her desk and closing the distance between them in record time. She reached out to examine Jane's injuries and was mildly surprised when Jane didn't pull away. Maura gently did a quick exam of her jaw and then stepped back.

"You're jaw isn't broken. Did you chip or loosen any teeth?"

Jane just shook her head.

Maura went into the lab for a minute and returned with an ice pack and her first aid kit. A well-stocked first aid kit as she was getting used to having to tend to various injuries her best friend sustained over the years. She looked over at Jane. "Come. Sit down."

Jane wandered over the couch and sat down. Maura broke up the ice pack and handed it to Jane. Jane pressed the ice pack up against her jaw. Jane allowed a small wince to escape when she pushed the ice into the welt. Maura turned her attention to the cut on Jane's lip. It wasn't bad at all. All she needed to do was clean it up a little. Within a few minutes she had cleaned the wound.

Jane had sat quietly while Maura attended to her. Maura was the only person Jane allowed to help her. She routinely refused to go to a hospital even for serious injuries. She wouldn't let EMTs attend to her. No one could touch her but Maura. Jane trusted her. She would let Maura do anything she needed to do without resistance. As long as Maura didn't ask her to go to the hospital.

As Maura finished up she looked at Jane. "So...what happened? I didn't think you had a suspect for this morning's case yet?"

"It was nothing. A kid just got in a lucky shot," she looked away from Maura as she answered.

Maura seemed to sense that Jane wasn't going to go into elaborate details about whatever had transpired. Over the years she had been friends with the detective she had learned not to push Jane when she wasn't volunteering information. It wouldn't get her anywhere. So, she let the subject go hoping that at some point Jane would fill in the missing details.

"You are finished," she said as the last of the clean-up was done on Jane's lip. "Take these," she handed two aspirin to her, "and try to keep the ice on your jaw for at least the next fifteen minutes. It will bruise but nothing worse than that."

Jane stood up and looked at Maura. "Thank you." There was nothing but sincerity in her tone.

"Any time." Which she meant but always hated seeing Jane injured at all. Before Jane could walk out of the office Maura added one other comment. "And Jane? When you want to talk about whatever really happened this morning, you know where I am."

Jane let a smile creep across her face but then headed out of the ME's office to head up to the bullpen.

When she got there Frost was at his desk but Korsak and Cavanaugh still had not returned. She sat down and turned on her PC. She trolled through several folders until she found the form she was looking for and she started to complete the official incident report for what had happened at the cafe. Jane had spent years completing police department reports on all types of incidents. There was a language and a flow to writing an incident report. It was something a cop learned only through years of practice.

Jane typed away and was surprised at how quickly the report was taking shape. At this pace she would be done with her end of the reporting in another fifteen minutes. And sure enough, fifteen minutes later Jane finished her report. She did a quick spell check but only one mistake was found. She hit save on the report and then opened her email account. She opened a new email and addressed the message to the eight people who needed to be included in the message. She attached her incident report form and hit send. She then printed a copy of the incident report to create a hard file as well.

She was about to log off of the laptop when an email came across. Jane couldn't stop the involuntary reaction to the email. She felt her eyes roll. It was from the last person she wanted to be hearing from and Jane knew what the email said before she even opened it.

_To: Detective Jane Rizzoli  
From: Belinda Simmons  
Subject: Interviews_

Detective, my office has been inundated with requests for an interview with you regarding the situation from the coffee shop today. We have decided the best strategy is to schedule several appearances on the morning news shows which can occur as early as tomorrow. There is some national interest in this story and I am working to identify the best national platform for this. Please be advised that I will need a few moments of your time to schedule and coordinate the interviews.

Belinda

Jane shook her head at the screen. The nerve of the woman. She clicked onto the reply button and typed Korsak and Cavanaugh's names in the cc line.

_Ms. Simmons_

I'm not sure who the 'we' is that you are referring to but I have not nor will I agree to any interviews. Inquiries about the events of today will be handed by your office. There is no need to try to coordinate anything as I will not grant an interview for television or print media. My answers to all questions remain "No Comment".

Detective Rizzoli

She felt Frost reading the email over her shoulder. The sound of her fingers slamming down on the keyboard had been his first indication that something had just pissed off his partner. She let him read the email and he quickly caught what had set her off.

"Didn't she learn her lesson after the last time she tried to put you on the press circuit?" he asked.

"Apparently not. But it will be a cold day in hell before I let that lady parade me out in front of the press just so she looks better."

Frost snickered and returned to his desk. He had no idea why the PR liaison routinely tried to get Jane to play her games. To his knowledge Jane had never once granted a single interview to the press. He knew she wasn't about to start now. Belinda Simmons seemed to be ignorant to the fact that she was playing with fire. And Frost knew his partner well enough to know that it would Simmons that would get burned long before it would be Jane.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

About an hour later Korsak and Cavanaugh returned from the coffee shop. Cavanaugh walked over to Jane's desk and she handed him the hard copy of the incident file.

"The required forms are completed. We will still need to add supplemental statements based on any conversations the suspect may have said with the EMTs that escorted him to the hospital. The hospital is faxing over the statements from the doctor and one of the nurses."

"Thanks. We will track down the EMT team and get the statements. From what we are being told the suspect, Jackson Eggert, is talking to anyone who asks him what happened. He said he only wanted money but he did tell a nurse that he would have used the guns if anyone had tried to stop him. Jane, you kept a lot of people safe today."

Jane heard him but chose to blow right passed Cavanaugh's comment. That wasn't anything she was going to focus in on. She cleared her throat and spoke. "Sir, I copied you..."

"I saw it Rizzoli. You could have been a little nicer with your rejection."

"Sir…" she started angrily.

But he cut off her cut off attempt. "But you have the right to refuse any interviews so don't worry about it."

"After what she tried the last time, she's lucky that email is all I did to respond to her request. Which by the way wasn't even a request. She's already trying to line up national media. I'm not her story Sir."

"Careful Jane. She does work for Boston PD. And I know you aren't the story. But she sees you as one. She always has. Jane you have been involved in several very high profile cases and…situations. How you've handled those situations has always made you her Grail. She's always wanted to be the one that got you in front of that bank of microphones."

"That is never, ever going to happen. You need to get her off my back," Jane said and didn't try to hide the disdain she felt the PR liaison.

"I'll handle it." And with that he made his way out of the bullpen.

"Jane, the press was all over the place after you and Frost left. You are going to want to go out the service entrance tonight. The vultures are definitely circling." Korsak warned with sympathy. He knew of Jane's dislike of the media.

"I figured as much. Seriously there has to something more important to talk about in this city than this."

"It's a good story Jane. Your quick reaction saved a lot of people today. The press loves it when the good guys win one from time to time."

Jane couldn't help but roll her eyes in frustration. "I didn't do anything that either one of you wouldn't have done had you been there. And if the press wanted to focus on the incident I could almost allow that. But you and I both know that it will evolve from the coffee shop to some story on me and I refuse to let that happen."

"Fair enough. Cavanaugh will handle Simmons so just let it go. Let's get caught up on this morning's case." Korsak turned his attention to the small case file from the body they found in the Back Bay earlier that morning. "Anything on an ID yet?"

"Nothing," this offered from Frost. "I haven't gotten a hit on prints and Dr. Isles hasn't had any luck on a DNA match yet."

Korsak, Frost and Jane spent the rest of the day running down the few clues from the case they could find. The victim was male between 18-20 years old and that was almost the entirety of what they did know. There was no wallet or cell phone discovered at the scene nor was there any sign of an abandoned vehicle. The body was recovered in an alley in the Back Bay but based on the scene Jane and Korsak were both convinced it was the dumb sight and not the actual crime scene. Maura had placed time of death between 7:00 - 9:00 pm of the previous night.

There was no video for Frost to watch. No witnesses to interview. Frost and Jane's early morning canvass hadn't produced a thing. Jane spent most of the afternoon sifting through Missing Persons files with no luck. Until they had an ID on the victim there was no further investigation that could be done. Maura was still working on the autopsy and had only been able to confirm cause of death was a gunshot wound to the upper chest.

Jane hated cases that made her feel like she was nowhere in the first 24 hours. Such cases had a bad habit of remaining unsolved from lack of evidence. She understood that sometimes there just wasn't anything to really go on but this guy was just a kid. However his clothes were relativity well maintained and he was clean. He didn't appear to be homeless or a runaway. Someone was going to miss him soon. When that happened she was sure there would be leads to follow.

"Guys, we've got nothing," Jane said in complete frustration as she closed the last of the Missing Persons files.

"Someone will report him missing Jane," Frost said but he was just as frustrated. He, too, hated being nowhere on a case this early into it.

With nothing more she could do for the day Jane knew it would be a good idea to try to go home. She realized it would be better to take Korsak's advice and head down the service elevator and out the back way. The desk sergeant had confirmed to Korsak fifteen minutes ago that the press was still lingering in front of the station hoping for either a shot at Jane or an official statement from Simmons.

She had done all she could for the day so she told the guys she was sneaking out. Both wished her a good night and she collected her items and made her way to the service elevator. She took it down to the parking level and made her way towards her car. She was almost to her car and feeling confident when she heard the first of them.

"Detective! Care to make a statement?"  
"Detective! Look this way! How does it feel to once again to considered a hero?"  
"Detective! Please just a quick statement!"  
"What made you notice the suspect?"  
"Were you afraid others would get hurt?"

Jane was furious. She had no idea how the press got into the underground parking garage. It was supposed to be for official police vehicles only. But there were about 6 reporters each with their own camera man and photographers all chasing after her. She was maybe 200 feet from her car. She knew she would get there before they could cut off her path.

She made it, but barely. She refused to look towards the windows. She started her car and shifted into gear letting the car move forward. She really didn't care if any of them were in the way. She wasn't stopping. Smartly, they all managed to move out of her way. She made her way out of the garage and didn't release the breath she was holding until she was convinced that none of them had gotten into their cars to follow her. Once she was sure she wasn't being followed she grabbed her cell phone and dialed Vince.

"What's up Jane?" he answered.

"Find out who the asshole was that let the press into the garage!" She practically screamed into the phone. Her anger almost boiling over.

"Son of a bitch!" He cursed. "I'm sorry Jane. I'm on it." He disconnected and Jane set down her phone on the passenger seat.

As Jane drove she started to relax a bit. She kept checking her rear view mirror but didn't see any news vans following her. She thought maybe she managed to escape the circus until she turned down towards her street. She suddenly found the news vans. Parked in front of her apartment. This set her off again. She turned the car into an alley and completely changed her destination. Twenty minutes later she was pulling her car up into Maura's driveway.

Thankfully there were no vans or reporters near the ME's Beacon Hill home. Jane knew Maura was still working so after she parked she sent a text.

_Mind some company for dinner tonight? J_

She had a key. To both houses on the property but it always felt like she was intruding when Maura didn't have an idea she was coming over. She never just went into Maura's house. Jane's phone buzzed and she smiled at Maura's instant response.

_Would love it. If you get there first just let yourself in. I have about an hour more here. M_

That was all the permission she needed and she knew she really didn't even need that at all. But it somehow made her feel better. She took out her copy of Maura's house key and let herself in. She disarmed the security system and smiled again when she remembered convincing Maura to have the system installed in the first place. She made her way into the house and finally for the first time since the coffee shop incident felt safe and at ease.

That was the thing about Maura. She always just felt safe for Jane. And on days like this Jane let her mind run through the reasons why the beautiful ME was that safe haven for her. In moments like these Jane allowed herself to admit that she was in love with her best friend. She had been for quite some time. Truly, deeply, no holds barred in love with her. Weak in the knees, butterflies in the stomach, sweaty palms love.

But it was an unrequited love. So Jane limited the times and occasions she let herself really feel those feelings for Maura. She would never tell her. She would never tell anyone. She had become an expert at hiding those feelings. She knew no one knew. Or at least the ones she cared for didn't know. Jane was always aware of the rumors and assumptions about her relationship with Maura. But she never cared what any of those people thought. She was certain that Maura, her family and her partners had no idea of her love for the doctor. And it was always going to stay that way.

It wasn't anything she was ever going to act upon. It just something that was. It was why she let Maura bandage her up every time she got injured when no one else could help her. It was why she let Maura comfort her when she had a nightmare when no one else could chase the demons away. It was why she let Maura see her scared and vulnerable when for everyone else she had only a tough and brazen exterior. It was why she let Maura touch her hands when no one else was even allowed to look at them. Jane loved her and trusted her like no one else in her entire life. Family included.

What had started out as a slow and sometimes awkward friendship had turned into first an endearing and strong friendship and then for Jane a genuine love. If she really, really had to pinpoint the moment she went from being best friends with the doctor to being in love with the doctor she could. She just didn't let herself linger long on that memory.

Instead, Jane focused on the friendship and joy the doctor brought into her life. It was more than Jane deserved to have. Maura's presence in her life was a gift she never quite felt she was entitled to. Never quite felt it was something she had earned. But she seemed to have it none the less and it was the most important relationship in her life.

So for it to exist in only the form of a great friendship so be it. That really was all Jane had the right to ask for. And it meant keeping Maura in her life which Jane understood to be an absolute necessity. She knew she couldn't exist without Maura in her life. Maura was her lifeline. Her sanity. Her rock. There was nothing she would do to ever risk that.

So as she made her way into Maura's house she just let herself bask in the warmth the house offered her. This place seemed to be more her home than her own apartment. Because it was Maura. There was no place she wanted to be more than where she was in that moment. She let the security she derived from the Beacon Hill home wash over her. The peace was interrupted by vibration of her phone.

_Can you feed Bass for me when you get there? M_

_Sure. And I'll handle dinner. Just come home when you are done. J_

She scrolled through her phone and dialed a number.

"Hey Janie! I heard about what you did this morning. Hell of a save! And I heard the press got into the parking garage."

She should have known the word was out already. "Thanks little brother. And at the moment the press continues to be my problem. I need a favor."

"Anything." Frankie answered. There really wasn't anything he wouldn't do for his sister.

"News vans were staking out my place. I headed over to Maura's instead. I'm not talking to them. Can you stop by and get Jo for me?"

"Sure. Do you want her to just stay with me for a bit or should I bring her over to Maura's?"

"Can you bring her over here?" She missed her dog and she knew Maura wouldn't mind. Plus Jo loved playing with Bass. Whether Bass enjoyed Jo as much was not yet determined. How could anyone tell if a tortoise was having a good time?

"Sure thing. I'm almost off my shift I will swing over and rescue her."

"Thanks Frankie. I owe you one."

That matter settled Jane needed to let Cavanaugh know that press had been in the garage and were also at her house.

_To: Sean Cavanaugh  
To: Belinda Simmons  
CC: Vince Korsak  
Re: Press at my home_

_I was confronted by members of the press this evening in the BPD underground parking garage. That garage is a controlled access point and for authorized personnel only. I find it unacceptable that I was accosted in such a manner and I would like to know how they gained access to the parking garage._

_Furthermore, the press is currently staked out in front of my apartment. I fully expect Ms. Simmons to handle this matter and remind the press that I have a right to my privacy. They need to get away from my home. Fix this before it gets out of hand. I will not be harassed in this manner by the press. As a reminder, the fix will not include my participation in any interviews._

_Detective Rizzoli_

Jane knew Cavanaugh would be furious. He valued privacy for his detectives. Jane was confident that the garage incident alone would have stirred him to get Simmons in line but with the press going to her home he would get Simmons to put an end to it immediately.

After sending the email she went to work on dinner. First she feed Bass as requested. The turtle was warming up to her finally. He actually took food from her hand now. She then milled about trying to figure out what to do for dinner for her and Maura. Thankfully Angela stocked Maura's fridge as often as she stocked Jane's. There were plenty of options for leftovers which Jane knew Maura would not mind. She selected lasagna and started to reheat it. She figured Maura would be home soon.

She heard her before she saw her. But then again it had been that way for most of her life.

"Jane! Jane you have to turn on the TV!" Angela shouted as she came barging into Maura's house. While Jane could never fully just enter Maura's house without the ME knowing she was coming over her mother did not share that same hang up. Angela came and went as she pleased.

"Ma, what are you yelling about?" Jane asked only half paying attention. She was used to her mother's theatrics.

"TV Jane. You are on TV. What happened today?" she asked with a mixture of excitement and curiosity. She had the remote to Maura's TV in her hand and was channel flipping before Jane could even exit the kitchen and enter the living room.

Both Rizzoli women turned their attention to the news Angela had turned on.

"_Early reports indicate that there were 20 to 25 individuals inside the coffee shop at the time Eggert entered. While police have not released an official statement our sources have indicated that Eggert was planning to shoot anyone in the shop at the time. Our sources also indicate that Eggert was in fact stopped by the actions of one of their own. A Boston police detective is being credited for stopping what would have been a possible massacre before any shots were fired. While there is no official statement our sources have indicated that the detective in question is Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli."_

Jane tuned out the rest of the voice over. She was focused in on the pictures on the screen. The visuals rotated between footage of the exterior of the coffee shop which seemed to be live coverage to taped footage of Jane and Frost leaving the coffee shop earlier that morning to stock footage of just Jane. She recognized some of the images and even what cases the footage had been pulled from.

"Turn it off Ma," she said. Her tone was flat.

"Jane, what happened this morning?" Angela pulled her attention away from the TV and looked at Jane for the first time. She noticed the bruise on her face and her cut lip. "Jane? Are you ok?"

"Turn it off Ma," Jane repeated and walked back into the kitchen. She heard the TV turn off and knew Angela would end up in the kitchen.

"Jane, will you please tell me what happened this morning? Did you really stop that guy from killing people?"

"Ma…" Jane started but was interrupted.

"I'd like to know exactly what happened this morning too," stated Maura as she walked into her kitchen.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Jane didn't even spin around to look at Maura. She wasn't surprised by her question or that she was home. She lived there and Jane had been expecting her. She felt Maura's eyes trained on her but she kept her focus on her mother.

"Ma, you shouldn't listen to the news. They over sensationalize things."

"Well then tell me how you got that bruise on your jaw?"

Jane knew she wasn't going to get her mother to stop asking for details now that she saw the report on TV. Releasing a sigh she understood that it was now in her best interest to just explain the event to Angela. It would save her a headache in the end.

"I was at the coffee shop to get coffee," she turned to look at Maura for a minute. "I was going for a cup for you too." She let Maura nod in appreciation of the thought. "While I was in line waiting to place my order I noticed the kid enter the shop. Something about him tipped me off. He was nervous. I stepped out of line and sent a message to the guys to send officers. I was able to move closer to the kid and when he went for the gun that he had I was able to subdue him before he was able to do anything."

Jane tried to avoid looking at Angela. She knew what look she had on her face. She had seen it before. A mother's look of pride. She knew just by the tone of Angela's voice she was beaming. What she didn't see was Maura's reaction to Jane telling her story. While Maura was proud of what Jane had managed that morning her look was one of curiosity. She had noticed that Jane was avoiding Angela's glance but she was struggling to understand why.

"Jane! You are a…" Angela was cut off immediately by Jane.

"Ma. We've had this conversation before. No I'm not. I was just doing my job." Jane was stern but not harsh.

Angela knew Jane hated being called a hero. She also knew she shouldn't have started to say the word but she couldn't help herself sometimes. "It's just that you saved all those people. It was like 30 people."

"Don't be like those reporters Ma. It was only 15. And all I did was what was needed in that moment. Any cop who was there would have done the same thing. So let's not make a big deal out of this." She wanted to be done with this conversation.

Maura sensed Jane wanted to change the subject so she interceded. "What are we having for dinner?" It was a weak attempt at a subject change but Maura was hoping it was enough to pull the attention away from Jane. Even if only for a moment.

Jane smiled as she recognized what Maura was attempting to do. "I reheated some lasagna. Ma, would you like to join us for dinner?" Jane made a move to start pulling plates from the cupboard. She was happy for any distraction and a shift of subject.

Angela looked at Jane and knew she was done talking about the coffee shop incident. She sighed but then answered. "No, I can't. I promised Tommy I'd make him dinner tonight. You girls have a nice night though." She turned to leave and as she opened the door she turned back to Jane. "No matter what you want to believe I know what you did today was heroic and I am so proud of you. So very proud. Good night." She left without giving Jane a chance to respond.

Jane stared at the door for a second after it closed. A small smile crossed her face. She knew her mother was proud of her she had never questioned that. Standing in Maura's living room she realized it felt good to hear it every once in a while. "Thanks for the save," Jane said to Maura as she returned to the kitchen to finish setting the table for dinner.

Maura smiled as Jane re-entered the room. "She's your mother Jane. It's natural for her to be proud of you. You should let her tell you that from time to time. I'm going to change. I'll be down in a few minutes."

Maura headed up to her bedroom. She knew Jane had said all she wanted to say about today and Maura wasn't going to push the conversation further. As she made her way up to her bedroom to change she continued to think about Jane. She understood Jane not wanting the press coverage or the public attention but her refusal to let those close to her recognize her deeds still confused Maura. She also didn't understand was why Jane wouldn't let herself acknowledge the good she was responsible for.

When they first became friends and Maura noticed the habit she thought it a confidence issue. But she very quickly dismissed that as she got to know Jane. Jane did not have a confidence problem. So Maura began to wonder if it was simply a humility thing. But over the years she knew there was something more than that. Jane was very humble that was not to be doubted but there was something more imbedded in her constant insistence that she never did anything more than anyone else would have done. But what that was or why Jane never moved from that Maura had yet to figure it out.

About fifteen minutes later Maura was back downstairs. Jane had dinner ready and they sat down to eat. "Sorry it's just leftovers but I thought it would be better than take-out," Jane offered.

"This is fine. I love your mother's lasagna. And you are eating some salad tonight." Maura took her place at the table. She smiled at Jane when she conceded and put salad on both her plate and Maura's. "How does your jaw feel?" she asked with genuine concern.

"A little sore but not too bad. You were right it is just a bruise."

"I'm just glad that you weren't seriously hurt."

Jane nodded an acknowledgement of that comment but didn't expand on the conversation. "Frankie is coming by later with Jo. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not." She was about to say something else but Jane spoke first. She was a little startled by Jane's tone.

"They are outside my place Maura. I couldn't even go home," she didn't hide her frustration.

"Then you'll stay here. And tomorrow Cavanaugh will get Simmons to pull the press from your home. You know he is furious by now. They might even be gone already."

"They aren't," came Frankie's voice as he was entering the house. Jo was right behind him running free and running straight to Jane. "Sorry Jane but there is still 3-4 reporters hanging out in front of your place."

Jane stood up and took her plate to the kitchen sink. She wasn't really done but she needed something to do in that moment. She needed the distraction. Jo was still near her feet and she looked at Frankie. "Did you walk her?"

"No, I just picked her up and headed over here."

Jane opened a drawer in the kitchen and pulled out a leash for Jo that she kept at Maura's. She bent down connected the leash to Jo's collar. "Come on girl," she said as she took Jo outside.

Frankie turned to walk towards Jane but was stopped by Maura. "Wait Frankie. Let her go. She just needs a minute."

He stood looking at the door for a minute but then retreated back into kitchen. "Does she make it worse when she doesn't talk to them?

Maura thought about that for a minute. "It's difficult to say. There's a chance that if she answered their questions they would stop following her but there's also a chance that if they viewed her as cooperative they would just seek her out more. Her unwillingness to give them anything has usually led them to get bored and give up. That's what has worked for her in the past and it's what her first instinct is now. Whether that is the best strategy I'm just not sure."

"Is she ok?" he asked.

"I think so. The guy hit her this morning but didn't do much damage. The rest seems to just be frustrating her."

"Seems unfair. She does the right thing. Is the hero. But can't even celebrate the win."

"She wouldn't though. Regardless of the press." Maura said it matter-of-factly.

"What?" Frankie asked taken a bit by surprise.

"Frankie, have you ever know Jane to celebrate anything she has ever done? I mean, outside of a beer at the Robber with the guys, have you ever known her to allow for the praise or the celebration?"

He was quiet for a minute. He let himself think through some of the events of Jane's career. And he suddenly realized it. She never took credit or celebrated any of them. She barely accepted the 'good jobs' spoken to her. She had numerous medals and citations but she never displayed them. Never talked about them. "Now that you say that….no."

Maura was about to say something but Jo came running into the kitchen. Jane was right behind the dog. "How was the walk? Did it work?" she asked Jane.

Jane looked at her and knew what Maura was asking. "Yeah, it helped." Sometimes she was amazed at just how well Maura really knew her. She turned her attention to Frankie. "Thanks for getting Jo for me. Do you want a beer?"

Frankie shook his head. "No, I need to get going. I'll see you both tomorrow."

"Alright. Thanks again little brother."

"Good night Frankie," Maura added as she followed Jane into the kitchen. She walked to the fridge and pulled out a beer and handed it to Jane who was leaning up against the island. "You didn't really eat that much earlier. Want me to reheat something or make you something else?"

Jane accepted the beer but shook her head. "No, thanks though. I'm not really that hungry. Sorry for walking out earlier. I just needed some air."

"You never have to apologize to me," she said. "So, we have two options. We can stand here and continue to not talk about this morning or we can head into the living room, watch a movie and just try to relax. The choice is yours."

But as Maura had offered it up to Jane as a choice, she was already making her way into the living room. Jane stood in the kitchen for a moment and couldn't help but chuckle. "Right, the choice is mine," she mumbled under her breath and followed the doctor into the living room. She looked over at a smiling Maura and added only one comment. "No documentaries and no news."

"I can live with that," and she handed the remote to Jane.

R&I

"_While there is no official statement our sources have indicated that the detective in question is Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli."_

The television flipped to another channel.

"_We are awaiting an official statement to be released by the Boston police department but our sources have been told that it was in fact Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli who subdued Eggert."_

The television flipped channels again.

"_Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli is being named as the person responsible for stopping the suspect, Jackson Eggert. Our sources said witnesses claim Detective Rizzoli singlehandedly disarmed Eggert before anything could happen."_

And again the television switched to another station.

"_Rizzoli, if you remember was the detective involved in the apprehension of notorious serial killer Charles Hoyt not once but twice. There was also a third encounter with Hoyt in which he was killed after trying to take Rizzoli and Chief Medical Examiner Dr. Maura Isles hostage. Rizzoli is no stranger to heroics. She earned a Distinguished Service commendation for her actions during the siege of the Boston police precinct in which she shot through herself in order to subdue one of the suspects."_

The TV was turned off and the remote went sailing across the room crashing up against a wall. Thrown in anger. In frustration. Jane Rizzoli. It was always Jane Rizzoli. Rizzoli this. Rizzoli that. It was never about the victims. It was hardly ever about the suspects. Why was it always about the detective? What was it about the detective that made the media outlets praise her the way that they did? Why was she always the lead? She was always the story.

The detective wasn't as good as people believed. She wasn't a hero. She wasn't perfect. Why couldn't people see that? It was about time the city of Boston got to know the real Jane Rizzoli.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The following morning Maura was up early. It was her normal routine. Early rise. Yoga. Then breakfast before getting ready for work. When Jane stayed over she was used to having to wake the detective. To say that Jane was not a morning person was an understatement. But they had worked out a decent routine over the years. Maura would generally wake her after yoga but before breakfast so they could have coffee together. Jane didn't always eat breakfast but she would get up for coffee with Maura.

Maura couldn't help but smile when she thought about the coffee. They were so different in so many ways but coffee seemed to be a place where their differences just stood out. Jane would drink instant coffee and not think a thing about it. It was a testament to their friendship that Maura allowed the jar of instant Jane hid in her cupboard to remain. Maura preferred a more refined cup of coffee. Rich beans or an exotic blend to set her coffee apart from coffee made available to her throughout the day. Jane fussed and occasionally complained but Maura believed she secretly enjoyed the better coffee over that of the instant.

When Maura finished her yoga she headed down the hallway to the guest bedroom. She lightly knocked on the door but didn't hear the normal greetings of the sleeping detective. Normal for Jane was typically a loud groan and some incoherent mumblings about needing a few more minutes or not wanting to go to school. She knocked again this time a bit louder and still nothing. She opened the door and looked in and was surprised. The room was empty. The bed was made, or at least Jane's version of a made bed, but she wasn't in the room.

Maura headed downstairs expecting to find Jane in the kitchen and was again surprised that Jane wasn't there. But there was coffee made and a note for her.

_M-_

_Coffee's made although it is just plain coffee. Sorry I still don't understand what half the buttons on your fancy dancy coffee machine are for. Thanks for letting me stay here last night. Thought I'd see if the vultures flew the coop. I'll see you at the station. _

_J_

She wondered just how early Jane had gotten up but when she headed to the coffee pot she saw that Jane had brought the paper inside. Maura knew her paper was delivered at 6 am so Jane must have just left as it was only 6:30 am. The newspaper was unfolded with the Sports Section on top. Jane always read the Sports section before she read anything else. Maura could tell the front section, the National news, had been left unread. But when Maura moved that section she couldn't miss what the headline on the Metro section was and there was no missing the photo of Jane centered right under the headline.

**Hero Cop Saves 15 from Would-be Assailant**

Maura scanned through the story and shook her head. The article was more about Jane than what had occurred yesterday. In Maura's estimation more than half the article was about Jane's career history with callouts about Hoyt and the station shootings. This was exactly what Jane always tried to avoid. Maura knew Jane was not going to react well to this.

R&I

Jane walked into Cavanaugh's office with a copy of the Globe in her hands. He was braced for her fury. He thought it was going to be bad just from the press run-ins from last night. The Globe article was just icing on the cake. The fact that she entered his office with the paper in her hand told him he was right about how upset she was going to be.

"Jane," he tried to start to keep her from yelling.

"Where is she?" Jane asked cutting him off. He flinched at her tone.

"I told her to be in my office at 8 am. She should be here in about 10 minutes. Don't go tearing up my office until she at least gets here."

Jane looked at her watch. It was 7:52. Instead of continuing the conversation Jane turned and sat down on the couch in Cavanaugh's office. She sat with one leg crossed over the other and she folded her arms across her chest. She was going to wait. In silence. Until that woman showed up. There was nothing else for Cavanaugh to do but sit and wait as well. He certainly was not going to try to engage Jane with conversation if he could avoid it.

At 8 am there was a knock on his door and Belinda Simmons entered. She was ready for Cavanaugh to give her grief but she was completely surprised to see Detective Rizzoli sitting in the office as well. She had heard that the press was camped out in front of the detective's apartment last night and she had seen some of the articles that were written for the newspapers this morning. She knew the detective was going to be angry.

"Sit down Belinda," Cavanaugh directed. Jane caught the tone of his voice. She had been on the receiving end of that tone a few times. Cavanaugh reserved it for when there was serious trouble.

"Yes Sir," she said hesitantly. Sitting down put her closer to Jane and she wasn't sure she wanted to be sitting that close to the detective.

"I need an explanation," Cavanaugh started.

"Sir, the press jumped all over the story yesterday. I can't control what they choose to write about. I'm sorry they ended up at Detective Rizzoli's apartment but if the detective would just consider giving an interview I am sure the press would back off."

"You can't control what the press writes about. And we have never asked you to. And as far as interviews are concerned, Detective Rizzoli has made, on more than one occasion, herself perfectly clear on that subject much to your dismay. However, I'm not referring to the actions of the press. I'm referring to your actions. What I need is an explanation for why you broke department protocol."

Jane looked a little surprised. She didn't know anything about department protocol issues. She merely wanted Simmons to get the press to not be outside her apartment. Cavanaugh's accusation pulled in her interest.

"Sir?" Simmons asked but Jane knew immediately that Simmons was aware of whatever it was Cavanaugh was now interrogating her about.

"Last night my detective was approached by members of the press inside our parking garage. Our garage is controlled access. Press is not allowed and you know that. So I need an explanation as to why you let them into the garage."

Jane turned to look at Simmons. If looks could kill the PR liaison never stood a chance of getting out of that office.

"I don't know what…"she stammered.

"Belinda, do yourself a favor here. Don't make this worse. We have access to the garage access readers as well as video footage. Did you really think we wouldn't have checked?"

"Sir…..I didn't think…." she paused and dropped her head. "I just thought…I just thought she'd answer some questions." It was a half admission.

"How much did they pay you?" Jane asked as she could no longer sit quietly.

And then the other half of the admission came. "Each team $200." Jane did quick math and knew Belinda cleared $1200 just to open a garage door. Jane wanted to ask her why but stopped. She realized she didn't really care.

"Belinda, I suggest you return to your office and begin to clear out your desk. Your supervisor will be in touch with you shortly." Cavanaugh dismissed her and she didn't feel the need to stay in the office another second.

Cavanaugh looked at Jane. "She will be terminated for that. Between you and me, she should have been fired for what she did to you the last time. I'm sorry Jane."

"None of this was your fault. I can't say I'm surprised she took money from the press. I was always sure she did that last time too. I just couldn't prove it."

"I'll have someone from the press office inform the media outlets that persons found in front of your place will be considered to be trespassing will be arrested for harassment."

Jane nodded. "Thanks. I doubt it will come to that. This," she held up her copy of the Globe, "will be yesterday's news by tomorrow. They will all be on to bigger and better stories."

Cavanaugh was a little surprised by Jane's demeanor. She was clearly upset with Simmons but not nearly as upset about the newspaper article as he thought she would be. She was right. They would move on to the next story as soon as something happened but he had been prepared for a vintage Rizzoli rant. Her resolve and calmness was almost freaking him out.

She leaned back on Cavanaugh's couch and was quiet for a minute. "Sir, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"How did you handle them?" She was curious.

Cavanaugh leaned back in his chair. "I was like you in some ways but not in others. My general instinct was to avoid them. 'No comment' is a staple for detectives regardless of the generation. But at the same time, I would answer some of their questions. When the situation called for it or when it could be useful. The best I can say is that there is a balance somewhere in between answering and not answering. And each person needs to decide where that balance exists for themselves."

"During your career, did they ever seem to focus more on you than the crime or the criminal?"

He knew what she was asking. He had noticed that the press seemed to want to make Jane the story more than the actual events, the suspects or even the victims. "No Jane. They wanted answers to questions from me but they never wanted information about me. To be honest, you are the first one I've seen that seems to capture the media's attention more than the crime."

"Gee, lucky me." She said and didn't hide the sarcasm.

"Jane, my gut tells me that you do the right thing when you don't talk to the press. No matter what the circumstance the stories all seem to turn towards a focus on you and I know you don't want the attention. And I don't blame you for not wanting that attention. If I thought answering their questions would stop the fascination with you that they seem to have I would have suggested that to you a long time ago."

"So you don't think talking to them or answering their questions would make things easier for me?"

"Truthfully Jane, I believe for you to do that might make things worse."

R&I

"She really took money from those reporters to let them into the parking garage?" Frost asked as Jane got Frost and Korsak up to speed.

Jane nodded, "$200 a piece."

"I can't say I was surprised when I pulled the video footage after you call me last night. I figured it had to be her or someone in her office." Korsak added.

"Jane, did you or Cavanaugh ask her about last time?" Frost could hide the curiosity in his voice.

Jane's last run-in with Simmons happened shortly after Hoyt's attack on her and Maura in the prison hospital. The official statement of the incident was that Hoyt was killed during an attempt to take Jane and Maura hostage. It was decided it would not be release to the public that Jane was the one who killed Hoyt. The media response for the attack and Hoyt's death was overwhelming and Simmons had gotten the idea that Jane should do a press conference and then the media circuit. She thought the department could cash in on Jane's heroics and capitalize on the positive press. Simmons went ahead and got all the media outlets on board and had everything scheduled. She just failed to take into account that Jane was not going to agree to any interviews.

Jane refused to cooperate and complained to Cavanaugh that Simmons set up the interviews without her permission. Simmons was reprimanded and forced to cancel all of the appointments she had arranged. The press was furious with her as they had promised interviews with Jane to their producers and several outlets had even released promos claiming the detective was breaking her longtime silence.

A week after Hoyt was killed there was a simple, private burial for him. It was arranged by a nephew of Hoyt's. The entire burial, including which cemetery, was kept a secret at the request of the family. The family was concerned that Hoyt's gravesite would be a target for vandalism. His headstone wasn't even going to contain his name.

No one was going to be in attendance for the burial. No one, however, except Jane. She had a private conversation with the family and they had agreed to allow her to be the only witness to the burial. She needed to be there. She needed to see for herself that he was really dead. Buried and dead. As far as Jane knew the only people who were aware that she would be in attendance had been Cavanaugh, Korsak, Frost and Maura. She hadn't even told her family. And no one but Maura even knew which cemetery.

But somehow the location and details got out. Jane could never prove it at the time but she was convinced that Simmons discovered the information and was the one to alert the media. Her office line logged a call to Hoyt's family but she claimed the call was to confirm background information for an official release only. No member of Hoyt's family would answer inquiries about the call.

What should have been a private, quick burial turned into a media circus. Media, newspapers and photographers all flocked to the cemetery. Pictures of Jane standing over the gravesite of the serial killer who had targeted her three times ran in the papers for weeks. Stories and editorials about Hoyt's fixation on Jane played on every station and in every newspaper.

And then it got out that Jane was the one who killed Hoyt by stabbing him. Simmons was responsible for that. That they could prove. Simmons released a statement from the press office admonishing the attention on Jane and the funeral attendance. The statement called her actions in the prison hospital heroic. It stated that Jane's decisive actions to subdue Hoyt saved the life of the medical examiner as well as her own. Simmons released the statement without proper approval. She later claimed it was a miscommunication in her office. Jane wanted her fired. So did Cavanaugh. The department gave Simmons a two week suspension instead.

"It didn't come up," Jane answered Frost.

"Well, she's fired this time. They should have canned her months ago," Korsak stated. He never liked the woman either.

"Now that that's over, can we get back to work?" Jane asked. It was time to shift their focus back to more important things. They had an unsolved homicide and hadn't even been able to identify the victim yet. "Frost, anything on the victim's prints?"

Frost shook his head. "No hits. And Maura never got a hit from the DNA either. Ballistics ran the bullet fragments but there's no match or link to any previous cases. So we have nothing."

"No one has reported him, or anyone similar to him, missing?" Korsak asked.

It was Jane's turn to shake her head. "Nothing there either. Guys, unless something else turns up we are stuck." They had run out of leads and viable options.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N Thank you all so much for all the follows, favorites and reviews. The response to this story has been overwhelming and I am humbled. I hope you continue to enjoy where this story goes.**

**We are at the start of the Rizzles arc so enjoy that. And I know I have a lot of different things happening in this story….but you should know by now I'm a full service story creator so there are always many layers. Everything will tie back together as the story progresses…I promise.**

**For now…enjoy the next few chapters as its Rizzles time. **

Chapter 6

Without any further leads Frost, Korsak and Jane bounced around ideas on things they could have overlooked or neglected. The brain storming session lasted about an hour before all three were frustrated. Jane, not having any other options, took the Missing Persons files she had already been through twice and went through them again. She knew she wasn't going to find anything but she needed to be doing something. Frost and Korsak had already volunteered to re-visit the crime scene and re-canvas the neighborhood.

Jane finished leafing through the Missing Persons files. Frost and Korsak hadn't returned yet so Jane decided to head down to see Maura. She wanted to double check the labs and she also hadn't updated Maura on what happened with Cavanaugh and Simmons that morning. Jane stopped by the café and had Angela put together two salads for lunch for her and Maura. She carried down the food to the morgue and headed for Maura's office.

She caught sight of Maura still in the lab and paused at the window. Maura's beauty could easily take Jane's breath away. It did on a regular basis. Jane, over the years, had seen Maura in all manners of dress and style. Everything from formal dresses to simple casual looks or workout clothes. However, in Jane's opinion nothing, no matter what the designer name on the label, absolutely nothing looked better on Maura than her black scrubs. There was just something about that look that had an impact on Jane every single time.

Jane let herself linger in the window for a moment. A brief moment but one of the many stolen moments she let herself have from time to time. The moment passed and she knocked on the window to gain Maura's attention. When Maura looked up Jane flashed the bag Angela had packed and pointed towards her office. She waited until she was sure Maura understood the signal and then entered the office. A few minutes later Maura entered with a smile on her face that could make Jane go weak in her knees if she let it.

"I brought you down lunch," Jane smiled as Maura entered.

"Thanks! I'm starving." Maura walked around to her desk as Jane pulled lunch out from the bag. She set out the salads and tossed Maura a set of silverware.

"So Cavanaugh fired Simmons this morning," Jane began to catch Maura up. "Turns out she was the one who let the press in the garage last night."

"That bitch!"

Jane couldn't help but start laughing. Not for Maura calling Simmons a bitch. Because the woman was. What set off the hilarity for Jane was Maura's reaction to hearing herself curse. Many a time had Maura admonished Jane for her use and love of swear words. This had to be only the third or fourth time Jane had ever heard Maura swear. The moment was perfect and Jane wished she had a photo of the look on Maura's face as she said it. But, deep down she knew it was a look she would never forget.

"Easy there Dr. Isles," Jane tried to say through fits of laughter.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have said that," Maura's cheeks flushed an adorable shade of pink.

"No Maura, that was absolutely perfect." Jane said still snickering.

"It's just she's caused so much trouble for you over the last couple of years. I can't believe she would do that."

"I can't believe you are surprised. I figured it was her. Korsak found the video and it was her access card they used. Plus, she admitted to Cavanaugh that she got paid."

"That…" and she stopped before she said it again. Which forced another fit of laughter from Jane.

"Wow, that was almost twice in less than two minutes. I do believe I am becoming a bad influence on you," Jane said but she was beaming with pride.

Maura chuckled, "Apparently I am picking up on some of your bad habits Detective."

They both shared a laugh for a moment and Jane shifted topics. "I don't suppose the autopsy on our John Doe yielded any more information, did it?"

Maura shook her head. "I'm sorry. I found no match in CODIS for his DNA. Official cause of death will be listed as exsanguination."

Jane was a little surprised. "He bled out?"

Maura nodded. "The GSW was technically not fatal. If he would have been provided even minimal medical assistance he could have recovered fully from the wound. I agree with you and Vince that the alley was a dump site. There were only trace discoveries of blood there. Our John Doe lost a considerable amount of blood somewhere."

"Anything else from the autopsy?"

Maura shook her head. "Nothing substantial. No other signs of injuries. His labs all come back clear. He was in excellent physical condition. His stomach contents showed he ate pasta, salad and bread about an hour before he died. I found dirt particulates under his fingernails but those results aren't back from analysis yet. No fibers or hair follicles were found on his clothes. No apparent stains on any of his clothes either."

"Ugh!" Jane put down her fork in frustration. "I hate running into dead ends this early in a case."

"I'm sorry Jane."

"It's not your fault Maura. I know that if there is anything to find your team will find it. It's just right now we have absolutely nothing."

They finished their lunch and Jane got up to head back upstairs.

"What are your plans for this weekend?" Maura asked before Jane took off. It was Friday and Maura knew Jane wasn't on call this weekend.

"I'm off. I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Are you still off?" They had long ago worked to arrange corresponding weekends off.

"Yes, Dr. O'Malley is on call this weekend."

Jane smiled as an idea suddenly occurred to her. She pulled out her phone and doubled checked the date. "Hey Maura?"

"Yes?"

"With everything that's happened between yesterday and today, I'm kind of in the mood to just get away for a few days. All the press attention should die off in a day or two and I'd rather not chance another run-in if I can avoid it. Feel like joining me for a weekend away?"

Maura beamed. They hadn't gone anywhere together in a few months. "I would love that. Where do you want to go?"

Jane smirked and let a mysterious grin cross her face. "I have an idea. We can take off later tonight." She started to leave without any further answers.

"Jane? Jane? Are you going to tell me?" Maura shouted.

"No!" was hollered back as Jane was already at the elevators. She had several things she needed to arrange.

"What am I supposed to pack?" she asked but apparently asked of no one as Jane was now gone.

R&I

_Tell me! M_

_No. J_

_Driving, flying or train? M_

_Driving. J_

_Formal or casual? M_

_Really? J_

_You're right. How casual? M_

_There are not degrees of casual. There is just casual. J_

_That doesn't exactly help me. M_

_You aren't seriously asking me for packing advice are you? J_

_Just tell me where we are going and I can figure out the rest. M_

_Does that genius brain of yours understand the concept of a surprise? J_

_Yes. But it also needs to understand the clothing requirements to sufficiently pack. M_

_Casual. Meaning no heels and no dresses that cost more than my salary. J_

_That's a start. You're really not going to tell me are you? M_

_Nope. Deal with it. J_

_Jane! M_

_:D Just be ready by 6. J_

_JANE! M_

_6. J_

R&I

Jane made her way down to the café to speak with Angela. She was going to need Angela's help if she wanted to successfully pull off this weekend. Her anticipation for the weekend rose throughout the day. Spending the afternoon teasing Maura had definitely helped with that endeavor. It had been almost four months since they had gone anywhere together. That was a similar weekend excursion but Jane had made the mistake of letting Maura plan that weekend.

The hotel was nice. The food was nice. The company was excellent. But Jane found herself propelled into a weekend of antiquing. Which she discovered the hard way was just a fancy term for shopping. And shopping for nothing. Shopping for the sake of looking at old things and having Maura explain their origins and purpose and the twelve other facts her genius brain could reference. Shop after shop after shop.

As much as she loved Maura and would do anything for her, she wasn't about to agree to another antiquing weekend. So this time, the weekend destination and activities were for Jane to plan. And she knew exactly what she wanted Maura to have a chance to experience. She had been saving the idea for just the right moment. Earlier that morning sitting in Maura's office Jane came to the realization that this weekend was that perfect moment. In between the teasing text messages, Jane was able to arrange just about everything. Only two more details remained. And she was about to address one of those two.

"Hey Ma," Jane said as she entered the café. "Stanley lurking around?"

"No, thank goodness. That man drives me crazy," Angela exclaimed. "What can I do for you? Coffee for you and the guys?"

"Actually Ma, I need a favor. Well actually two favors but one of them is pretty easy."

"Sure Janie. What do you need?"

"First the easy one. Maura and I are both off this weekend and I want to go away for it. I'm still trying to avoid any run-ins with the press and I figure by the time we get back they all will have moved on to the next story."

"That's an excellent idea. You haven't taken any time for yourself in a couple of months."

"I know. I do need a break. So, first favor. Will you watch Bass and Jo for us this weekend? If I bring Jo over to Maura's will you make sure they both are taken care of?"

"Of course. That's no problem whatsoever," Angela said with a smile. "So what's the other part of this favor?"

"Well, this one's a little more involved. But before I even ask I need you to promise not to tell Maura. It's a surprise and she will try, at least once, to get it out of you and you can't say anything."

Angela's face lit up as the smile stretched from ear to ear. Her daughter was about to make her a co-conspirator in a surprise for Maura. She was so excited Jane knew she would agree to anything in that moment. For a second Jane just enjoyed the look on Angela's face. Angela really did love Maura and consider her a daughter. Jane always hated how isolated and alone Maura had spent most of her life and the fact that Angela cared for the woman she secretly loved and was there for her on a daily basis made Jane love her mother beyond words.

"I promise. Not a word. Now, what is it that I'm not telling her?"

R&I

Jane added the last of Maura's bags into the trunk. She turned and looked at Maura and couldn't help but roll her eyes.

"You do realize that we are in fact returning on Sunday, right?" The woman had packed enough for at least an entire week if not more.

"Oh no! You don't get to complain about my luggage. This, Detective, is the price you pay for refusing to tell me where we are going. If you want fewer bags in your car then tell me what the plan is and I guarantee I can eliminate at least two bags."

"Nice try, Doc. But not a chance. Keeping you in the dark is worth the hernia I'm likely to sustain hauling your luggage to and from the car."

Angela couldn't help but laugh listening to the banter between the two ladies. Jane had been right. Maura cornered Angela the minute she got home trying to discover Jane's plans. But Angela was true to her word and didn't reveal a thing. Jane would be so proud. She was bursting at the seams to tell her but she knew Maura would appreciate the trip and the surprise better if she didn't find out until the last possible minute.

"Angela, please reason with her. She won't tell me a thing," Maura pleaded once more the Rizzoli matriarch.

"I'm a vault Maura. Sorry. But you girls have a good time and please at least send me a text when you get there safe and sound."

Jane snickered at Maura's attempt to find out what was going on. "I will Ma. And thanks for watching Jo and Bass for us." Jane allowed Angela a hug and then turned to Maura who was being crashed in an Angela bear hug. "Alright Doc. Let's hit the road."

R&I

There had to be ten different newspapers sitting on the table. As the pages of each paper were turned it was becoming clear that what was being sought was not being found. Page after page after page. Not a mention. Not a hint. Not a blurb. Nothing.

The fact that it was missing in the major papers, the Herald and the Globe, wasn't a complete surprise. But it was a disappointment. But the fact that there was nothing in the local papers was devastating. Forsaken for articles on redistricting plans, social media happenings and movie reviews. And, of course, all ten papers carried articles on the so called hero cop. The name Rizzoli was everywhere. Her picture was everywhere.

How could it go unnoticed? Unreported? How?

After the last paper was searched and there was the final confirmation that there was nothing to be found the papers suddenly went flying into the air. The cause of that was the table they had been sitting on had been forcibly knocked over and sent sailing across the room. The loose pages of the newspapers littered the room. The anger and frustration for the entire situation just couldn't be contained any longer.

Clearly the first effort wasn't good enough. It was time to plan for a second. Something bigger. Something better. Something that would catch the attention so richly deserved.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The car headed out for the journey. Maura tried a few more times to get Jane to tell her where they were going but finally conceded defeat and stopped asking. She realized that she was enjoying the fact that Jane had planned the entire weekend for them. She had no clue where they were going but Jane seemed excited and that was good enough for her.

For her part, Jane was excited but nervous at the same time. She was just trying not to show it. She was nervous for two different reasons. First, she wanted Maura to have a good weekend. She was worried about whether Maura would like what she had planned. Jane thought she would but if she was way off base this could really be a long weekend.

Second she was worried about being with Maura for the weekend. So close to the one she loved. They had spent weekends together before and she had managed to get through it without doing or saying anything stupid. But she worried just the same. She was always afraid she would slip up and say something that would indicate that she had feelings for Maura.

Jane had convinced herself long ago that Maura couldn't possibly love her. Not the way Jane loved Maura. She knew and understood that Maura loved her but as far as Jane was concerned it was a friendship love. They were best friends. Both would do anything for the other. Theirs was a solid and strong friendship but only a friendship.

Jane knew that she was a very large part of Maura's life. Maura was virtually alone before she met and befriended Jane. She barely saw her own family. The social awkwardness that endeared Maura to Jane had also prevented Maura from developing friendships prior to Jane. Before Jane, Maura had acquaintances. Jane really was the first person to look past some of Maura's quirks and see the person behind the genius. Jane swept into Maura's life and brought her loud and overbearing family with her. And Jane understood that Maura had come to depend on those relationships. Maura was family.

Because of that Jane knew she could never make Maura feel uncomfortable in their relationship. And Jane was convinced that acting on her feelings for Maura would put the relationship in jeopardy. She would never hurt Maura in that way. She would never make Maura have to question Jane's presence in her life. She wouldn't cost Maura the only real family she had. So her love for Maura stopped at friendship.

It was enough for Jane. It meant Maura in her life every day. It meant getting to listen to Maura talk about random facts on everything. It meant getting to see the look Maura would get on her face when an idea excited her. It meant getting to witness up close the twinkle in Maura's hazel eyes when she would laugh. And it meant getting to be the source of that laughter on occasion. Jane wouldn't trade any of that on a dream. Not when Maura couldn't possibly feel the same way.

So she managed to bury her true feelings for Maura deep within herself. Some days were easier than others. On harder days she found she needed to distance herself from Maura in order to fully breathe. But for the most part Jane could interact with her without incident. She could spend the entire day with her. Sit on the couch next to her and let her snuggle into her. Let her fall asleep on her. Even sleep in the same bed together although Jane tried to limit how often that happened for her own sanity.

"Jane?"

The sound of Maura's voice snapped Jane to attention. She hadn't realized that she had spaced off. And she knew she had spaced off in the middle of Maura talking. "I'm sorry what were you saying?"

Maura chuckled, "I was asking you how much farther?"

"I thought you were done trying to guess at where we are going," she said with a smile.

"I am but I'm going to need a restroom break soon if we still have a ways to travel. I was trying to figure out if I could wait but I don't know how much farther we have to go?"

Jane chuckled too, "Oh, sorry. We probably have about an hour. I'll stop at the next rest area."

"Thank you," she said and smiled. She had noticed Jane's demeanor change as they were driving and it worried her. She reached over and turned off the radio. It hadn't been playing too loud and Jane had yielded control of the music to Maura as a reward for being a cooperative passenger but Maura wanted to talk to Jane. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why do you ask?"

"You just grew a little quiet once we started out. You were excited for this weekend earlier today but now you seem a little distracted."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to fade on you. I was just thinking." Jane turned to look at Maura and smiled. She didn't want Maura worrying about her unnecessarily. There was an exit with several gas station options coming up and Jane took the exit. Jane knew Maura needed to stop and she could stand to get gas, a soda and stop the present conversation before Maura could ask her what she was thinking about.

Maura headed into the gas station while Jane handled the gas. A few minutes later Maura returned with beverages for both of them and they headed out again. Maura picked up the conversation where they left off before the gas stop interruption.

"You do know you can talk to me about anything, right?" Maura was fairly confident that Jane told her more than she told anyone else. But she had always understood that it didn't mean that Jane told her everything. Even after all the years she had known her, after all the things they had seen each other through, Maura understood there were many things about Jane she still didn't know. Too many things.

"I know that," Jane answered. And she did know that. But it was not to say that she took Maura up on that as often as she probably should. "I'm good Maura. I am."

"Jane, your definition of 'good' can be very different from everyone else's."

"What are you saying?" Jane asked genuinely confused with where the conversation was going.

"You hold on to so much. Too much. And to you, that seems normal. But I worry about what that does to you. You take on so much. You do much for so many people but you rarely let anyone ever help you. I just want to make sure you know, really know, that you are not alone."

Jane hadn't expected this kind of conversation so she really didn't know how to react or what to say. So she didn't say anything for a few minutes. Maura let the silence continue. Clearly it was not going to be Maura who broke it.

"I know I'm not alone Maura. I do." Her tone was reserved but sincere.

Maura hesitated for a moment but then continued. "Jane, I want something from you."

With pause Jane answered. "Ok?"

"I don't want an answer right this minute. It's something I want you to think about before you tell me, if you tell me. But there is something that I would like to understand about you."

"What do you want to know Maura?" she asked slowly not quite sure she wanted to know the answer to that question.

Maura shifted in her seat and stared at Jane. She wanted to make sure she could see Jane's eyes when she explained what she wanted. Maura's best shot at reading Jane was if she could see her eyes. "I want to understand why you have such a hard time acknowledging all of the good that you do in your life."

As hard as she tried, Maura couldn't read Jane's eyes in that moment. For her part, Jane wasn't prepared to answer that question so she didn't.

R&I

Twenty minutes later Jane pulled into a driveway. Maura had tried to pay attention to roads and road signs as Jane drove but short of knowing they were somewhere in New Hampshire she had no idea where they were. Jane put the car in park and turned to Maura. "We are here."

"Where exactly is 'here'?" she asked looking around.

"Geographically, Laconia, New Hampshire." Jane said as she exited the car and stretched.

Maura got out and looked around. She had been expecting their accommodations to be a hotel but this was a residence. "Jane, whose house is this?"

Jane had walked up to the front porch and went to the mailbox. She opened the mailbox and removed a set of keys. She turned to Maura who was still closer to the car than the front door. "Come on, I'll bring in the bags later." Jane put the key in the front door and let herself in.

Maura followed behind Jane who was now standing in the living room. The lights in several rooms were already turned on and having seen Jane pull the keys from the mailbox Maura knew that someone had been here to prep for their visit. She just had to ask again. "Jane? Whose house is this?"

"This was my Grandparent's home. After they passed the house was left to Ma, my Aunt and my two Uncles. The family rents the house out to families for the summer. The town is on Lake Winnepesaukee so it attracts the summer tourists. But when the house is unoccupied our family shares it. It's on a first come first serve claim basis and we have the run of the place for the weekend. My cousin Sarah opened it up earlier today and she should have done some food shopping for us as well. Would you like the ten cent tour?"

"Sure," she said as she looked around. The house was nice but the décor was simple. Maura wondered if that was because it now served as a summer rental instead of a permanent family home.

Jane sensed what Maura was thinking. "Frankie, Tommy and I spent every summer of our childhood in this house. I wish you could have seen this place when my Grandma was still alive. Whenever anyone talks about a house feeling like a home, this is the home that I picture. Our old house was nice but this place just always felt like home to me every time I came here. My Uncle Sam replaced all the furniture when they decided to rent out the home. My Grandparent's stuff is all in storage now."

Jane took Maura on a tour of the house. She spent time describing each room and what used to be in it. Listening to Jane, Maura could easily picture how the house used to look. The current set up on the house was nice. The furnishings were comfortable and welcoming but the house was missing the knick knacks, photos and little things that turn a house into a home.

"Are you hungry? We can do into town and get something for dinner," Jane offered after the tour of the house was complete.

"That would be great," Maura said and they made their way to the car. She was glad to be sharing a part of Jane's childhood with her but was still curious as to why they were here of all places. She sensed they were in town for something specific but she didn't know what.

Ten minutes later they walked into a diner that was on the city's main street. Maura didn't question Jane on where they were going. This was clearly a town Jane knew well so she followed her lead. They were seated by a hostess who looked like she was still in high school. Before menus even hit their table a voice from behind the counter rang across the diner.

"Jane Rizzoli as I live and breathe!"

The man attached to the voice came out from behind the counter and headed over to greet Jane. Jane stood up and accepted a hug from the man Maura estimated was in his 60s. "Hello Mr. Andrews. How are you?"

"Oh, I can't complain. What are you doing up here? I haven't seen you in about three years. How's your mother?" The man was beaming as he spoke with Jane.

"Ma is fine. I'm just up for the weekend. Mr. Andrews, this is my friend Maura. Maura, this is Mr. Andrews. This is his diner." Maura took the hand the man extended.

"Very nice to meet you," Maura stated.

"Likewise. Any friend of Jane's is a friend of mine. I've been feeding Jane and her brothers since they were old enough for solid foods," he laughed. He turned to Jane, "It's so funny that you're here. I was just reading about you in the paper this morning. That was a good thing you did yesterday Jane."

Jane dropped her eyes for a second. But she quickly looked back up. "It was nothing. Just doing my job." Maura couldn't help but notice Jane tense up as she tried to play off the compliment. This was what Maura wanted to understand about Jane. She never understood this reaction and she saw it all the time.

"I read that your quick thinking saved a lot of people. You should be proud of yourself Jane. We are all so proud of you." Mr. Andrews placed his hand on Jane's shoulder and smiled a kind, sincere smile.

Jane fidgeted for a second and quickly worked to change the topic. "Maura, this man makes the best meatloaf sandwich known to mankind," Jane stated as she sat back down.

"Are you here for dinner? I can show this nice young lady that you aren't exaggerating," he offered.

Maura nodded. "We are here for dinner. And that sounds just fine."

Jane was a little surprised. Meatloaf sandwiches weren't normally within Maura's comfort zone for what to order. "Maura, you can look at the menu if you want."

"If the meatloaf sandwich is a house specialty that's good enough for me."

That comment made Mr. Andrews smile. "It most certainly is a specialty. I'll take care of it for both of you." He turned to Jane. "What brings you into town? The festival?"

Jane smiled and nodded. She glanced over at her and knew that Maura was hearing even a hint of their plans for the first time. "Maura has never been to the festival so I thought I'd show her what she's missed out on."

"You will love it!" he announced. "Let me go start those dinners for you both. What can I get you to drink?"

"Just water for me," Maura said.

"The same for me as well," added Jane. Mr. Andrews nodded and disappeared into the kitchen.

"He seems like a nice man," Maura said.

"Yeah. He's right. I've eaten more meals here than I could ever count. And, you didn't have to agree to the meatloaf Maura. There are some lighter, healthier options on the menu."

"That's fine. I'd like to try it. So what is this festival?"

Jane suddenly beamed. The festival was the reason they came up here. Maura had told Jane once a few years ago that she had never been to a carnival or a fair as a kid and Jane remembered how sad that was. Jane and her brothers had spent their summers up in Laconia and every year the town hosted a festival that marked the end of the summer. There was a fair, a carnival, a parade and even a good fireworks display on the last night. Jane had always had a good time at the carnival and had wanted Maura to experience everything firsthand. This was the last weekend of the festival and Jane thought the timing was perfect.

"The town hosts a festival each year that marks the end of the summer. We used to go every year before we had to head back home for school. I thought this would be something you would enjoy since you told me once that you never had the chance to go to a fair or carnival when you were a kid. I thought I'd show you the one I grew up going to. I hope you don't mind."

Maura leaned back and smiled. She had made one comment about a carnival to Jane about two years ago and was surprised Jane had remembered. The thought of experiencing something new that was so much a part of Jane's childhood excited her. "I don't mind at all."

Mr. Andrews personally brought out their dinners when they were ready. He stayed and talked with them for a few minutes getting caught up on Angela, Frankie and Tommy. He shared some of the local gossip he thought Jane would be interested in knowing. Maura enjoyed observing the two interact. And Jane was right. The meatloaf sandwich was excellent.

R&I

Jane brought the last of Maura's hundred bags into the house. She carried them upstairs and placed them into the room she assigned to Maura. Her room was directly across the hall. As she dropped the last of the bags she turned her attention to Maura.

"The bathroom is down the hall on the left. There are towels and everything already in there. I thought tomorrow morning we could go for a run around the Lake. There are some good paths for jogging and I'd like to show you around a little."

"I'm up for anything," Maura said stifling a yawn.

Jane snickered. "Not at the moment. You won't be up for much longer."

Maura conceded, "No, I don't imagine I will be."

"Well alright. Get some sleep and I'll see you in the morning."

"Good night Jane."

"Good night Maura."

R&I

"Dr. O'Malley, I'm Sergeant Korsak," he said as the ME approached the crime scene. "Our victim is over here." Korsak led the doctor towards the body. "The victim is…" he started.

"Sergeant, I'd like to look for myself thank you." The ME said dismissively and began his examination.

Korsak backed off. He wasn't going to get into it was a covering ME. This wasn't even his case. He only took this call as a favor to Cavanaugh. Jane and Frost weren't on call this weekend. It was Crowe and Rodriguez. But they were still tied up at another scene so Cavanaugh asked Vince to oversee this one until Crowe could free himself. He should have known not to answer his phone. He looked down at his watch. Dispatch said Crowe was about fifteen minutes out. Once he got there, Vince was free to leave.

As Vince stood supervising the scene he failed to notice that he was being watched. An impatient set of eyes scanned from left to right taking in the details. Flashing lights. Cops and CSRU personnel walking about. The medical examiner doing an initial assessment of the body. The sight of two news vans pulling up briefly produced a smile. But the smile faded. Something was wrong. Something was missing. The eyes scanned the scene once more. The old man was there but where were the other two? Where was Rizzoli?


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

Both Maura and Jane were up early. Jane's cousin had stocked the kitchen with the essentials and Jane figured she would make them both breakfast after their run.

"So, what are we going to do today?" Maura asked as she couldn't contain her curiosity any longer. She was aware of a festival but what all that entailed and what their exact agenda was still a mystery to Maura.

Jane smiled. She loved seeing the look on Maura's face when she was excited about something. Maura had been very patient about this weekend. She decided to lay out the planned schedule. Or at least most of the planned schedule. "Well, first we are going for a run down at the lake. The trails are good and I think you will love the scenery. After that, we can come back here, I will make you breakfast and we can get cleaned up. This afternoon we are going to walk through the fair and there are a few places downtown I thought I'd show you. And tonight, I'm taking you to the carnival and the fireworks show."

Maura smiled. She had never been to a fair or a carnival and now she was going to get to experience both in the same day. She was getting excited. She had no idea what Jane had planned when she agreed to the weekend getaway and she was actually quite surprised Jane was sharing this with her. Jane didn't share much about her childhood. Maura picked up small tidbits from time to time if Jane and Frankie were telling stories or if Angela wanted to make a point. But in general Jane didn't talk too much about when she was a kid. This was a rare glimpse into Jane's past and Maura was almost as excited to listen to Jane's stories as she was about experiencing a fair or a carnival.

Ready for a run they headed out. As Jane drove them to the lake where they would pick up the path they would run Jane gave Maura a driving tour of the town she spent her summers. She pointed out buildings and locations explaining what they were or what they used to be and when she could she told Maura a story or two about the mischief she and her brothers had caused as kids. Maura took it all in and while she was enjoying the tour she liked learning about Jane and seeing her relax the most.

Jane parked the car and they headed out on their run. They were good running partners. Jane wasn't the biggest fan of jogging but she knew she needed to stay in shape for her job and she hated running on a treadmill. She never liked the monotony of it. So if she had to run she wanted to run with Maura. They paced each other well and there was a good balance between conversation and comfortable silence that Jane found was needed for longer runs. This morning was no different.

Conversation happened in spurts as the two jogged at an even, casual pace. It was usually sparked by a house or landmark they would pass and Jane would offer up its history or recall a story. Maura asked an occasional question trying to get a mental picture of what Jane was really like as a kid. She was surprised as how candid Jane's responses were. Normally Jane was short on words or vague in her answers but today she was going into detailed anecdotes about her time here or things in her childhood.

Jane had been right about the scenery. Maura took in the landscape. The lakefront was beautiful. But what struck her most was how peaceful it seemed. She could see how this place was special for Jane. There was certainly plenty for a kid to do and keep their summers occupied. Maura was envious. She didn't begrudge Jane's childhood but she did find herself wishing she could have experienced something even remotely close to it for herself.

When silence settled between them as they jogged Jane's thoughts returned to what Maura had asked her the night before. Her mind raced in pace with her steps. If she was honest with herself she wasn't surprised that Maura had asked. Jane knew her behavior and her habit of shying away from compliments or praise had always confused Maura. She was actually surprised Maura hadn't tried to ask her sooner. She understood what Maura wanted to know but she wasn't sure if she was prepared to answer that question. It was a complicated question which had an even more complicated answer. But Jane knew Maura wasn't going to stop asking and she wouldn't be able to avoid answering forever.

They finished their run and both felt exhilarated. As much as Jane complained about running she always felt better after a run. Her mind was still bouncing thoughts around the pace slowed and she had managed to run most of the tension out of her body. Instead of heading back to the car, Jane walked Maura over towards a pier. Maura followed Jane and when they approached a bench that looked out over the lake Jane indicated for Maura to sit down. Maura silently took her seat and looked out across the lake. The weather was perfect and the view across the lake was breath taking. They were both quiet for a while.

Maura could tell Jane's mind had drifted a million miles away. She had a cryptic smile on her face as she looked out over the water. "What are you thinking about?"

"I was just thinking about the first time I was ever on this pier," she said. "I was five at the time and it was the first time my Grandma had convinced Ma to let me come stay here over part of the summer. Frankie was too young and Ma was pregnant with Tommy so it was just me. My Grandma had brokered a deal to let me stay with them for a month. I had been in town for about three days and had, to that point, refused to come down here to the lake with my Grandpa."

"Why?" Maura asked.

"Pop had told me this story about these monsters that lived underwater. He said that they would swim around in the water patiently waiting for little kids of come play or swim. He said the monsters had the ability to make the water look clear and fun and that was how they got the kids to go swimming. Once the kids went into the water the monsters would grab them and eat them."

"That's terrible! That's an awful story to tell a child," Maura said. The appalled look on her face made Jane smile.

She chuckled. "That was my father for you. Nothing made him laugh more than scaring the crap out of me or the boys. It always affected Tommy the most. Pop would tell one ghost story and Tommy would have nightmares for a week. Ma would get so mad at him."

"I don't blame her," Maura said shaking her head.

"So Pop had told me that story and I was convinced that if I went into the water I would get taken and eaten by the monsters. I didn't even want to go near the water. So for the first three days I was in town each morning Grandpa asked if I would go with him and just walk around the lake. And each morning I refused. Finally my Grandma called Ma to figure out why I wouldn't go near the lake and she told them about the story Pop had told me.

"On the fourth day, my Grandpa again asked for me to join him at the lake but this time he promised no monsters would hurt me. I agreed to go as long as I didn't have to get into the water. When we got down here we walked the path you and I just ran. I made him walk closest to the water because I was convinced that the monsters would know I was near and I thought they could try to grab me. We walked the path and when nothing bad had happened to me I started feeling brave and asked my Grandpa if we could walk out onto this pier to look out over the water.

"He agreed, which I think was his plan all along, and we walked out to end and stopped right over there," and she pointed to the end of the pier. "We looked out over the water for a few minutes and then my Grandpa took my hand and asked me if I knew why the monsters hadn't tried to get me. I said no and he told me that the monsters couldn't get me because he and my Grandma knew a secret protection spell. If someone said the protection spell for me every night I was magically shielded from the monsters. He said I couldn't say the spell for myself but as long as someone else said it for me every night the monsters wouldn't be able to find me or hurt me."

Maura was smiling as Jane recalled the memory. "That's really sweet."

"Yeah, it was. I fell for it too. I was in the water and swimming that very same day. He promised that he and my Grandma would say the spell each night I was with them so I would be safe from the monsters. The next year Ma agreed to let Frankie come up here too and I made my Grandpa teach me the spell as I could say it for Frankie so he wouldn't get eaten by the monsters either."

"Do you still remember the spell?"

"Protect this dear little one for she is destined to do great things with her life."

R&I

They returned to the house and Jane got cleaned up first. The one drew back of the house was there was only one bathroom. She got cleaned up quickly and promised that breakfast would be ready for them both by the time Maura finished when it was her turn. Jane went to work on breakfast and by the time Maura re-entered the kitchen the table was set and the food was ready to go.

"This all looks great, thank you." Maura said.

"Any time Doc," Jane said with a smile. "Eat up. We have a lot of things to do today."

They had breakfast and chatted about nothing specific. Jane gave a little more history of the house and some background on some of her cousins. Maura volunteered for the cleanup since Jane cooked and Jane was perfectly happy to agree. Once the breakfast dishes were taken care of Jane ushered Maura back to the car.

"Ready to experience your first fair?" Jane asked with a smile.

"Yes," beamed Maura.

Jane drove Maura down to the fairgrounds. Not unexpectedly, the place was packed. Jane knew the busiest weekend of the festival was the finale weekend. She tried to warn Maura about the crowds.

"Now, no wandering off on me. This place is packed and I don't want to lose you."

Maura couldn't help but smile. Jane had such a protective side to her. Maura wondered sometimes if Jane even registered when it kicked in. "I'll stay close to you, I promise."

They got out of the car and headed towards the fair. The fairgrounds were set up with the carnival rides and games on one side and the fair tents on the opposite side. Maura was curious. "Why are we doing the fair before the carnival?"

"Simple. The carnival rides were always twice as fun at night than during the day. So, since this is your first time for a carnival too, I insist that you get the best possible experience. Fair tents now. Rides and games later tonight."

"I leave myself to your capable hands," Maura said and followed Jane towards the tents.

The fair part of the festival was something Jane was sure Maura would enjoy. Most of the tents were artist and craftsman making and selling everything a person could imagine. There was tent after tent of paintings, photographs, jewelry, clothing, woodworking, sculpture pieces and random artistic items. Maura's reaction to all of it was priceless. She had told Jane once that she was in awe of the things people were able to create. Jane had just managed to deliver her an entire playground of artistic wonders to explore and admire. Seeing the sparkle in Maura's eyes as they went from tent to tent was worth the trip alone.

Jane had mentally prepared herself for Maura purchasing at least one thing from every tent which had been the other reason to do the fair side first. She figured they would fill up the car throughout the day and then have their hands free for rides and games that night. Maura was slightly more reserved than Jane thought not purchasing items at every tent. But she bought more times than she didn't. Jane dutifully carried the items and each time they were close to the car they stopped and filled the trunk. It took almost three hours to walk every tent on the grounds. Jane, to her credit, never complained once.

"Jane, this was fabulous. I can't believe I've never done this before. Thank you!" she said as they relieved themselves of their last armful of purchases.

"And the day is still ahead of us. But, I'm starving. Ready for lunch?"

"Definitely. There were plenty of food vendors on the grounds. Is that where we are going?"

"Good lord no. I love fairs and carnivals but learn from my experience. Never, ever eat the food here."

"So where are we going?"

"This way Dr. Isles," Jane said and led Maura away from the fair and towards the marina. They walked down towards the marina and Maura assumed there was a restaurant Jane wanted to go to. She was mildly surprised when Jane headed to the Harbor Master's office and knocked on the door.

"Go away!" bellowed a gruff sounding voice.

"Is that how they taught you to speak to old friend John?" was Jane's immediate answer.

The Harbor Master's door opened and an older man stepped out. "Janie!" he greeted the detective and in an instant Jane was engulfed in a bear hug and spun around.

"John, put me down!" she said but was laughing as he spun her around.

"Alright, alright. God Jane! How the hell are you? You are lookin good!"

"Careful John. If Connie hears you saying that she'll kick your ass," Jane said with a smirk.

John put down Jane and stepped back taking in Jane's full appearance. "It may be worth the ass kicking," he chuckled. He then turned and looked at Maura. "And who is this?"

"John this is my friend Maura. Maura, this insatiable flirt is John. He runs the marina."

John extended his hand and Maura took it. "Pleasure," he said with a smile. Maura smiled back. The man really was a flirt.

He turned his attention back to Jane. "She's all ready for you. Do you remember the slip?"

"It hasn't been that long John. I remember."

He pulled a set of keys from his pocket and handed them to Jane. "Connie had to run an errand. She's going to be pissed that she missed you. How long are you in town?"

"Just until tomorrow. Quick trip. Tell her I'll catch up with her next time I'm in town."

"That won't sit well with her you know. You haven't been up here in a couple of years. Boston is keeping you too busy Jane."

"I know. Things just get pretty hectic. I'll try not to make it so long next time."

He nodded and was about to let the ladies head out but stopped. "Hey, she wanted me to give you a message if she missed you today." He suddenly changed his voice to something Maura could only assume was an imitation the Connie they had both referenced. "Tell Jane she done good yesterday. Her grandfolks would be so proud."

Maura watched reactions. John laughed at his own imitation but smiled a smile the conveyed his own sense of pride as well. Jane flinched but then forced a smile. She avoided any eye contact with John. It was the same reaction she had when Mr. Andrews tried to tell her he was proud of her last night. The same reaction Maura still did not understand.

"Thanks. Tell her I'll catch her next time. We need to get going," she accepted another hug from John and turned Maura around.

"It was nice to meet you," she said to John as they headed down a slip.

Jane stopped at slip #6. "Your ride," she said with a smile.

Jane climbed into the boat first and then helped Maura. "Jane, where are we going?"

"The best restaurant on the lake is on the other side of the lake. It's quicker to go by boat than by car. Plus I thought I'd take you on a boat tour of the lake on the way back to the fairgrounds." Jane untied the boat and powered on the engine. Within a few seconds they were headed out.

They had an excellent lunch at the restaurant. It was right on the water and they had a great view. The conversation was casual and both ladies were able to relax and just enjoy each other's company. They lingered at the restaurant long enough for Jane to time the boat tour just right. She wanted to be able to show Maura the lake by boat while it was still light out and time it for them to see the sunset from the boat.

Once back on the boat Jane again turned into a narrator pointing out different places and telling stories. She had managed to time things perfectly and they were going to be able to watch the sunset from the boat. Jane killed the engine and let the boat come to a gentle stop. Before she settled back into the seat next to Maura she pulled out two jackets handing one to Maura.

"Put this on. It's going to get a little chilly."

Maura smiled at the gesture and accepted the jacket. They sat and watched the setting sun. The colors of the sky bounced off the water. The water was calm and the little the boat rocked was relaxing. There was a calm quiet that washed over both Jane and Maura.

After a few minutes of quiet Jane spoke. "You're wrong you know."

"Wrong about what?" Maura asked wondering if they were in the middle of a conversation she didn't remember.

"I do acknowledge the things I do," Jane answered. She wasn't looking at Maura. She just let her gaze linger out over the lake.

"I don't think you do. You don't seem to let others or yourself acknowledge all the good you have been responsible for." Maura was quiet in her tone. "You shy away from it all the time. It's an instinct for you. Last night with Mr. Andrews, earlier today with John, you couldn't look either on of them in the eye when they tried to acknowledge what you did at the coffee shop."

"They all keep trying to make me out to be a hero. I'm not a hero Maura. I'm just a cop. I've only done what I've done because it is my job. Any cop would do the same thing."

"No. That's where you are wrong." That comment made Jane turn and look at Maura. "This is me you are talking to Jane. So don't try to pull that crap with me. I've seen firsthand the things that you have been through. Not all cops would have done what you have done and you know it."

"Maura, you know what I mean…" she started but was cut off by Maura.

"No, I don't. That's part of what I don't understand. You downplay what you've been through like it's all been routine. Sure, there are times were your work has been routine. I'll grant you that. But there are times where it has been anything but. My God Jane! You put a bullet through yourself to subdue Marino. Name one other cop that would have had the courage to do that because I can't think of one. It's not a cop thing Jane. It's you. You have done things not because you are Detective Rizzoli. You have done things because you are Jane Rizzoli. Why won't you recognize that?"

Jane looked away and was quiet for a minute. "I don't want to be singled out Maura. I don't want the attention." She didn't verbalize the other thought that was racing through her mind. _I don't deserve the attention._

"You think I don't know that? I know you don't do things for the glory or for the fame. I know you handled Marino the way you did because you were trying to save your brother's life."

"And yours," Jane mumbled quietly. That statement took Maura completely by surprise. Jane felt Maura's eyes focusing in on her. "I was trying to save you too," she clarified a little louder this time looking up at her.

"Jane, you save me every single day. And that has nothing to do with you being a cop. That has everything to do with you just being who you are." She said it so simply. Plainly. She hadn't meant for anything like that to be brought up but she said it nonetheless. And she meant it.

"I…" Jane paused not really knowing what to say next. She was having a hard time trying to interpret what Maura had just said. There was a look on Maura's face that Jane wasn't able to quite place. She couldn't possibly be implying anything with what she had just said.

Maura sighed in frustration. There were things she wanted so desperately for Jane to see and understand. She wished Jane saw herself as others did. But Jane refused see what others so clearly saw. She wanted nothing more than to get Jane to accept how truly special she was. "You are so completely backwards to me sometimes."

Jane looked at her with a confused look. "Backwards?" She really didn't understand where that comment came from.

"I've never known anyone who seems to so easily accept the bad things that happen to them like its normal and yet struggle so much to accept any of the good. You seem to embrace this idea that you are meant to have fear and pain and tragedy be a part of your life. You accept that. You expect it and because of that you handle all the bad life throws at you better than anyone I know. But, you push away anything good. It's like you don't trust it. Like for some reason you don't think you deserve it. So you won't let yourself see those good moments. Live and appreciate those moments. Your comfort zone is chaos and danger. That's completely backwards to me. Most people cling to the good in their lives and just try to get through the bad. You absorb all of the bad and push away any of the good."

"I see the good Maura," Jane answered but weakly.

"I don't think you do. If you did, you would let people tell you they were proud of you without shying away. If you did, you would let people tell you how special you are without dismissing the comment. If you did….if you really did you would let love into your life instead of hiding from it."

Jane stiffened for a moment. "I don't hide from love Maura."

"Yes, you do."

"No, I don't," she tried.

"If you don't then why haven't you told me that you love me? If you don't hide from love why haven't you acted on your feelings for me?" Maura paused trying to let Jane catch up to what she was saying. "And why don't you let me love you in return?"


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Sean, you wanted to see me?" Korsak asked as he stuck his head into Cavanaugh's office. He had a feeling he wasn't going to like what he was about to hear. It was bad enough that it was Saturday and he was still at the station trying to get caught up on paperwork. Now, he was getting pulled into Sean's office.

"Yeah Vince, come in for a second," Cavanaugh said as he looked up from the files on his desk. He let Korsak sit down in the chair before he started. "That crime scene you babysat last night for Rodriguez and Crowe is going to be re-assigned to Rizzoli and Frost."

"Why? They weren't on call this weekend. It should stay with Crowe."

Cavanaugh shook his head. "Normally I would say yes. But I just got the ballistics report back from the lab and there is a match. The gun that shot our second John Doe last night was the same gun used to shoot Rizzoli's John Doe from Thursday morning."

"Wait a minute. Are you telling me that Crowe and Rodriguez haven't been able to ID that guy from last night yet?"

"No hits from AFIS or CODIS so far. He is a second John Doe. No cell, no wallet, no vehicle keys found. Crowe is reviewing Missing Person's reports now but it doesn't look promising. The ballistics report links the gun so at this point these two shootings are related and I want Rizzoli as the primary."

"Two seemingly unidentifiable John Does shot with the same gun within three days of each other? I don't think I like the direction this is turning Sean," Korsak said.

"Neither do I Vince. Get with Crowe and Rodriguez and see where they are on John Doe #2. Feel free to call in Frost and Rizzoli from their weekend off if you think you need to."

Korsak shook his head. "No. Let them both enjoy it. I don't even think Jane is in town. I'll get what I can from Crowe and I'll see where Dr. O'Malley is on processing John Doe #2. I have a feeling we are in a waiting-for-labs mode right now anyway."

R&I

_Wrong, wrong, wrong! It was all wrong. What did I just do? How could I have made this big of a mistake? What if I just ruined everything?_

It took everything Maura had to stay locked in on the stare the two ladies had going in that moment. She knew if she blinked everything would be over before it even got started. She couldn't let Jane see anything but love, hope and warmth reflecting back at her. She couldn't let the panic she was feeling force her to break the eye contact. She couldn't let the panic show because she knew Jane would misinterpret those feelings. She was panicking. But it wasn't because she regretted what she had just said. She had meant every word of it. She was panicking about how she had just said it. She had fumbled the delivery and feared she lost the meaning of her message as a result. She needed to try to fix this. So she refused to relinquish Jane's eyes. She was not about to make a second mistake tonight.

Her first one might have just cost her everything. She held her breath and tried to center her thoughts. She didn't want Jane to see even a trace of uncertainty in her eyes. Instead, she willed her eyes to convey to Jane all that she wished and hoped. She wanted Jane to only see love. Hope for a future together. Acceptance. The promise of feelings being reciprocated. But in that moment her mind was racing and she struggled to quiet the storm. In that moment she was angry with herself.

It had happened all wrong. This wasn't what she had intended. This was not how she had pictured this moment in her dreams. In her dreams she was smooth. Confident. She had long since realized she would have to be the one. The one to make the first move. The one to push Jane in just the right way when it was time to walk this path. The one to make Jane feel safe enough to admit what Maura had known all along. What Maura had felt all along as well.

She knew she was always going to be the one to use the 'L' word first. But, in her dreams, when that moment came it was romantic and storied. It wasn't this. In her dreams there was always soft, romantic music playing in the background. Somehow there were candles all about to help set the mood. This wasn't that moment. This wasn't what she wanted or how she wanted it. Sitting in a boat on a lake in the midst of a conversation about an issue unrelated to how each felt about the other was not how this was supposed to happen.

When Maura dreamt of this moment everything was supposed to be perfect. She was supposed to be completely confident that Jane was ready to hear what she had to say. She was supposed to be sure that Jane felt the same way. It was supposed to be magical. It was supposed to be the best moment in her life. It was supposed to be the moment when she got what she wanted most. The moment when she finally got Jane. This wasn't that moment.

In her dreams, Maura delivered the perfect speech using all the right words. Her speech would convey the depth of her feelings for Jane. The words would do justice to how wonderful Jane was. The words would be just what Jane both wanted and needed to hear. The words would be what made Jane accept that the two of them were destined to share a life together. But this wasn't her dream. This was reality and in this reality she had said it all wrong. Used all the wrong words. The words came out jumbled and cloaked. She had gotten it all wrong.

In this reality she wasn't sure if Jane was ready for any of what she had just said. In this reality she wasn't even sure she had been clear about what she was trying to say. She tried to play back the words in her head but that only made things worse. She really had messed it all up. It wasn't supposed to be this difficult. It was supposed to just flow naturally from her lips to Jane's ears. She was just supposed to say 'I love you' and Jane was just supposed to know she meant it and that it was all going to be ok. But this wasn't that moment. And Maura had gotten it all wrong.

This wasn't that moment. As Maura worked to stay locked in the gaze of Jane's eyes still refusing to relinquish her hold the reality of what happened continued to sink in. This really wasn't that moment. And that meant, for Maura, she wasn't going to get the next moment from her dreams either. She had gotten it all wrong. She was now going to be deprived of the next moment.

In Maura's dreams, the moment immediately following her eloquent declaration of love was supposed to be the second best moment of her life. In her dreams, the next moment after this was supposed to be Jane's acceptance. Her complete and total acceptance of the love Maura had for her. The next moment was supposed to be Jane's understanding that she wasn't alone in her feelings. The next moment was supposed to be the realization that they had both finally found their way to each other. To where they each belonged. But since this wasn't that moment, Maura wasn't going to get her next moment either.

She wasn't going to get the reassurance she now so desperately needed. She wasn't going to see the relief she thought she would see from the deepest set of brown eyes she had ever known. In her dreams, relief would wash over Jane as she heard and accepted Maura's declaration as truth. Relief that they were both ready to face their tomorrow together. As one. But that next moment wasn't coming. Because Maura had said it all wrong.

R&I

_Stay calm. Just breathe. Think! Did she just say what I think she said? I need to be sure. This can't be wishful thinking. If I'm wrong, if she didn't just say that, I could ruin everything._

For Jane it felt like time stopped. Her mind was racing as she desperately tried to comprehend the things that Maura had just said. She heard them. She heard all of them. She just wasn't sure if she trusted what she heard. It wasn't Maura that she doubted. It was herself.

She didn't know if she could trust what she thought she heard. There was a decent chance her mind could be playing tricks on her. That somehow she had just convinced herself that Maura had just said that. Asked that. Implied that. It was quite possible that Jane let herself hear what she so desperately wanted to hear but not what Maura had actually said.

She wanted to close her eyes to help concentrate on replaying Maura's comments in her head. But she found that she couldn't. Maura had captured Jane's eyes and seemed to be refusing to let them go. Jane felt almost paralyzed by Maura's stare. Unable to move, to blink even, Jane was forced to reconstruct Maura's words as she sat staring at the beauty that was in front of her.

"_Jane, you save me every single day…."_

"…_why haven't you told me that you love me?"_

"…_why don't you let me love you in return?"_

There was a chance that this was all a dream. It wouldn't be the first time. She had dreams about Maura all the time. Dreams that they were together, truly together. Dreams of a life being built. Shared. Dreams where Jane was brave enough to declare her love for the best person she had ever known. Dreams where that woman felt the exact same way about her. This very easily could be a dream. A dream that would end as soon as the alarm clock buzzed as it so often had in the past.

But there was no alarm buzzing. No cell phone ringing. No distant call of a voice trying to stir the sleeping detective. This wasn't that. Jane wasn't asleep. She was wide awake and very aware of where she was and who she was with. Maura sat next to her. Her eyes still locked into Jane's. They were sitting in a boat on the lake of her childhood. Oddly the circumstances and surroundings had the makings of a dream. But Jane wasn't asleep. And she knew it. What she now needed to knew was had Maura really meant what she had said.

She stared at Maura trying to see if there was any indication from her as to whether what had happened had in fact just happened. Her eyes locked into the hypnotic hazel eyes that were staring back at her. Jane needed to read those eyes. She needed to understand the look on Maura's face and what it meant in that moment. She needed to be absolutely sure. Because if…if by some chance Maura had just said what Jane thought she heard, then this could be the moment.

This could be the moment when Jane finally told her best friend she was in love with her. The moment she pushed through her concerns about altering the best thing she had in her life in the hopes that such an alteration would make things better for them both. The moment Jane would put it all on the line because quite frankly Maura was worth going all out for. This could be the moment that changed everything.

This could be the moment Jane had denied herself for so long. The moment she decided to risk the safety of a friendship she had come to depend upon for the possibility of something more. Something better. The moment she allowed herself to believe she could move forward without the limitations. Without the boundaries and cautionary warnings that had up until now dictated her daily interactions with Maura. Without the slew of rules she had created for herself on what she could or couldn't, should or shouldn't do or say to the woman that captivated her So. This could be the moment that changed everything.

This could be the moment Jane finally convinced herself that every excuse she had for not telling Maura how she felt about her was just that. An excuse. A flimsy justification created to hide the real underlying issuAnd and concerns. The rationalizations Jane used to avoid confronting her own insecurities that would always creep into her consciousness. The insecurities that had long ago convinced her that she wasn't worthy of someone as wonderful as Maura. That hers was a life destined for heartache and loneliness. Roadblocks and barriers placed not by circumstance or outside factors but by Jane in an effort to insulate herself from the possibility of rejection. This could be that moment that changed everything.

This could be the moment Jane took her shot. The moment she stood up and decided to go for everything that she truly wanted in life. The moment she let go of all the fear and let herself see that it was all right in front of her for the taking. All she had to do was take that first step. Make that first move. Decide. For Maura. For herself. If she could convince herself that Maura had meant what she had just said, this really could be themoment that changed everything.

R&I

_This was that moment. _

It didn't matter that Maura had gotten it all wrong. For this wasn't Maura's moment. This was Jane's. The moment that was, in fact, going to change everything. Jane had heard Maura right. And more importantly, Jane was about to get this moment right.

She didn't blink. She didn't blush. She didn't hurry the movements. She very slowly, very deliberately stood up from the seat that just moments before felt like it had iron restraints keeping her from moving a single muscle. She stood up and with eyes still locked in on each other she closed the distance between herself and Maura.

She didn't speak. She barely took a breath. But once she was close enough she reached out and took Maura's hands into her own. She gave a gentle, reassuring squeeze but at the same time she tugged on them to indicate to Maura her desire for Maura to stand. She complied without question. Eyes still locked into each other.

Jane released Maura's hands letting them fall to her side while her own rose up to cup either side of Maura's face. Hands placed gently, barely making contact with Maura's skin. She paused and still their eyes stayed locked in on each other.

_This was the moment._

Jane leaned her head forward slightly resting her forehead for a brief moment on the forehead of the woman in front of her. The closeness, the intensity of the anticipation of what both women now knew was about to happen was palpable. Jane took in the moment. The sound of the water gently splashing up against the boat. The intoxicating scent that was distinctly Maura. The feel of the warmth radiating from Maura's cheeks even though there was a chill in the nighttime air. The distance, ambient sounds a mixture of music, the chaotic chorus of carnival rides or electronic games and snippets of conversations from the fairgrounds. Jane marked every second of this moment with every sense she had available.

_The moment that changed everything._

And then in one swift, confident motion Jane leaned in and allowed her lips to capture the ones that that had long been the object of her most secret desires. And for the first time in what felt like ages, their eyes broke the gaze that connected them having been sufficiently replaced by two pairs of now fully engaged lips.

This was the moment Maura was finally hers.

**A/N Ok guys…the reviews and PMs from the last few chapters have been amazing. You all are awesome! For those of you who posted as a guest that I am not able to reply back to I just wanted to throw out a quick 'Thanks!' and 'Continue to Enjoy' since I can't respond individually. I am truly humbled by the support. Still LOTS to cover….so I go back to the laptop. Until tomorrow….**


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

_Oh what a kiss._

From in second Jane's lips captured Maura's each woman poured herself into the kiss trying to ensure that what they both felt was communicated through that first magical touch. In that moment two became one. Two sets of lips were charged with conveying all that each lady had been hiding for too long: want, desire, tenderness, acceptance, love. All things pushed so forcefully into the background for longer than either would want to admit now suddenly allowed to be exposed. To be felt.

_Maura tilted her head and drew more of Jane into her._

It was the first time they crossed that proverbial line that separated friends from something more. Both unsure of what the future was to hold so neither was willing to waste this breach of boundaries on anything less than a perfect effort. Neither lady would be disappointed. It was like they had been doing this for years. The rhythm, the pace, the fit all such perfection both would wonder if they were in fact made specifically for each other.

_Jane reached out tangling her hands in Maura's hair pulling her in closer._

Jane had so much running through her mind in that moment. She was awestruck by the sense of it all. The softness of Maura's lips. The taste of her. The feel of Maura's breath against her skin. All mixed in with the small pockets of her surroundings that crept into her consciousness. Sounds. The feel of the breeze pushing between them. The rocking of boat as they both stood connected to each other.

_Maura moaned softly as Jane's tongue found its way into her mouth the taste intoxicating._

Jane was losing the fight with herself to not get lost in that moment. She wanted to be able to remember it all. She wanted to lock it into her mind so she could relive this moment at any time. But she just wasn't that smooth. She just wasn't in that much control. She was completely swept up in the raw emotions of suddenly getting to have what her heart desired the most. She easily gave into the moment. With just this one kiss from Maura Jane knew there would be no one else for her. Ever.

_Tongues replaced lips as the lead in this desire charged dance._

Maura had to struggle against her own sense of surprise. She had been convinced that she had completely handled the entire situation wrong. That she had made a mistake. But then suddenly, amazingly, Jane was there. Not moving away from her but moving in towards her. Not upset with her but so clearly wanting her. As much as Maura had always understood it would be for her to make the first move in this conversation she had always been equally convinced it would be for her to make the first actual move. But on the front she was wrong. Jane had made the first move and had kissed her. She was still kissing her in fact. Maura had never been so happy to be so wrong and in all of her life.

_Maura's hands began to roam down Jane's sides eventually settling on her hips._

The second Jane's lips took hers all was right in the world. All her fears about pushing Jane too fast too soon were gone. All her worries about trying for the perfect moment disappeared. Her mind quickly convinced her any moment with Jane was the perfect moment. Jane's lips on hers were better than any dream she had ever had. She melted into the kiss from the one she loved. She had loved Jane for a long time. She knew it and trusted in it. But in this moment, with lips still pressed together, she understood for the first time what it really felt like to be in love with Jane. It was a feeling she never wanted to end.

_Oh what a kiss._

Neither lady seemed to register the growing need for the oxygen that was quickly starting to run out for them both. Just like they didn't register the sounds of several boats passing them in the distance. Boats moving far enough away to not interrupt the two but close enough to disrupt the water. Waves started to rock the boat more forcefully and finally something of the outside world registered with the two. They needed to pull apart to avoid falling over from the ripples of the waves. Begrudgingly they broke apart. Both breathless as the need for oxygen had reached a near critical point.

Jane took a step back and looked into Maura's eyes. What she saw reflecting back at her melted her insides. No doubt. No confusion. Just warmth. And happiness. The moment had felt so completely right for Jane and looking into Maura's eyes she now believed Maura felt the same. Any concerns or second guessing she might have had faded from her entirely.

"Maura," Jane started. So much running through her mind. So many things to say. To ask. To tell. Before she could continue her sentence another boat passed by this time a little closer. The waves from the moving boat quickly rocked the boat Jane and Maura were in and both ladies were still standing up. A smile broke out across Jane's face. "You should sit down before you fall over."

Maura had felt the boat rock and while she was sure of her footing she listened to Jane and sat back down. She was a little surprised when Jane made a move to sit down as well. But she was pleasantly surprised when Jane sat down next to her. No hesitation. No hiding.

"Maura," Jane started again. "Did you really mean it?"

Maura knew exactly what Jane meant by the word 'it'. She smiled at Jane and captured her eyes again not wanting there to be any confusion with what she was about to say. "Yes, I really mean it. I love you." She smiled more to herself than for Jane. Happy she had said it this time as easily as she had always wanted it to come out. Maura would never in her life forget the look that swept across Jane's face in that moment. Such an endearing mixture of happiness, love and relief.

"I love you too," Jane stated through a smile that lit up her whole face. Almost as an instinct she had reached over and taken Maura's hand in hers. They both let their eyes drop to the hands now in front of them and it was easy to see the contradictions between them. But there were such similarities too if the right person was looking. The doctor's hand was small, soft and delicate. But Jane was aware of how much precision, power and control Maura's hand could possess when she needed. Jane's hand was strong, calloused and scarred. But Maura was aware of how light, delicate and tender the detective's hands could be when she needed. Opposites but yet the same in the right circumstances. Almost like to two ladies themselves.

Not ready or not sure how to start the conversation both knew needed to be had Jane leaned in and kissed Maura for a second time. This one picking up where the first left off but getting deeper and more passionate quicker. Jane felt Maura's tongue sweep across her bottom lip requesting access that Jane was happy to allow. Maura's tongue entering Jane's mouth elicited a soft moan from Jane as both allowed for the mutual exploration.

The kiss was even and controlled but not reserved. It was comfortable and filled with promise and passion. Maura was just starting to believe she could continue to kiss Jane like this for the rest of her life when they were both startled by a loud air horn. It made them both jump in their seats. Jane looked up to see a passing boat full of people clearly having a good time. Although Jane did not know the boat or recognize the people both she and Maura heard one of the passersby shout "Go for it!" It made both ladies chuckle.

Jane recovered first. "Ok, we should get moving. The lake is only going to get more crowded as the night goes on. Lots of people watch the fireworks from their boats. Our peace and quiet time out here is quickly coming to an end."

Maura understood as she had noticed the number of boats moving about on the water had started to increase. But she was a little disappointed. "Can't we watch the fireworks from here?" she asked.

Jane smiled a mischievous smile. "Technically we could," she started.

"Technically?"

"Yeah, technically we could. I have the boat for the night so we can if you really want to…" she paused just long enough for Maura to pick up on the hint.

"You planned for us to watch the fireworks somewhere else didn't you?" she asked.

Jane nodded. "I did. I was going to take you to where I always watched them when I was a kid." She looked around and back at Maura. "We can stay here if you would like but I can guarantee you that in the next hour this lake will be completely packed. The location I had planned with a bit more private," another boat full of people sped past them, "and certainly quieter."

Maura grinned. At this point she had absolutely no objection to going somewhere more private with Jane. "We can head in then. I'd like to see where you watched the fireworks as a kid."

Jane smiled. She was ready to get off the water and she now also didn't object to the idea of being alone with Maura in a more private location. She pulled up the weighted anchor and started the boat's engine once again. Making sure Maura was settled, Jane headed back to the marina. Maura was impressed with Jane's boating skills as she navigated the boat through the marina and returned it to the slip. She made a mental note to add boating on her list of future things-to-do-with-Jane list.

Jane tied the boat in the slip and exited the boat first so she could help Maura climb out. This time when Jane took Maura's hand to help her out of the boat she couldn't help but smile. Not one part of her had expected the night, the weekend, to take the turn that it had out on the water. Jane had to remind herself that she had in fact kissed Maura. That Maura had kissed her back. That each had told the other she loved her. It was all almost surreal. But the butterflies in her stomach when she took Maura's hand helped to remind her that it all had happened.

Maura walked with Jane back to the Harbor Master office but the door was closed and locked and the lights were all turned off. John and Connie were most likely at the carnival. Jane lifted up the mailbox on the outside of the office and threw the keys to the boat in. She turned and pointed for Maura to head back the opposite way.

She looked at her watch to check the time. "So, we have about an hour to kill before we need to head out for the fireworks. Why don't we at least walk around the carnival so you can get an idea of what it's like?"

Maura nodded. Part of her just wanted to go somewhere to be alone with Jane. They had so much to talk about after everything that happened on the boat. But part of her worried if Jane was ready for a long drawn out conversation at this point. She wasn't shying away from Maura and she didn't look like she was having any issues with what had started out on the boat but Maura wondered. Jane had clearly planned out the weekend and Maura didn't want to interrupt those plans. "To the carnival," was her answer for Jane deciding there would be time to be alone and talk later including the drive back to Boston they would have tomorrow.

They walked around the carnival. Jane explained all rides or games pointing out to Maura which ones she had been good at as a kid and which ones she hadn't been. For the rides Jane explained she would go on them but that was more because it was Tommy's favorite part of the festival and she always rode the rides with him. She explained that she only hated the spinning tea cup ride because it would make her sick.

Maura laughed, "Kinetosis." Seeing Jane's confused look she explained her answer. "Motion sickness Jane. Spinning and sudden stops are typical for amusement park rides and cause fluid to continue to rotate in the inner ear even when after the movement has stopped. The motion of the fluid on the inner ear is what causes the nausea."

Jane snickered at Maura's Googlemouth. "Whatever it was I got sick every time I rode that ride."

"But you rode it every year anyway, didn't you?"

"Well yeah. It was one of Tommy's favorite rides. Frankie wouldn't even consider it and I never wanted Tommy to ride by himself."

Maura smiled. There was something so reassuring about Jane's protective side. Knowing that she went on a ride that made her sick because it was important to her brother was oddly heartwarming. The things Jane would do for the ones she loved. On an impulse Maura reached out and took Jane's hand as they walked. She hadn't thought about it when she did it. But she was completely cognitive of it now. She understood that she was the only person allowed to touch Jane's hands. She just wasn't sure if Jane was open to hand holding in public.

Jane felt Maura's hand encase itself around hers as they were walking. It took her by surprise at first. She wasn't used to anyone touching or holding her hands. Maura was the only person she didn't reflexively pull away from. As unprepared for Maura's gesture as she was she didn't pull away. It felt good having contact with her as they walked. She looked down their hands intertwined and smiled.

"Is this ok?" Maura asked referring to their hands.

"Yeah, this is fine," she said and smiled at Maura. "But it's time we head to the car. Let's go." They headed out and to Maura's delight Jane made no attempt to withdraw her hand from Maura's until they got to Jane's car.

They drove in silence but it was a comfortable silence. They both understood there was much to discuss but neither seemed to believe it needed to be said that night. There would be time to talk. As they drove Jane reached over to retake Maura's hand letting both rest on the car's arm rest. She had liked the contact and had missed it when they entered the car. She suddenly realized it was now permissible to hold Maura's hand and that thought comforted her.

Maura enjoyed the feel of Jane's hand in hers and probably enjoyed it more because it was initiated by Jane. They continued to drive in silence until Maura suddenly realized where they were. "Jane, did you forget something?" she asked a little confused.

"No. We are here."

"We are back at your grandparent's house. We are going to watch the fireworks from here?"

Jane smiled again. "Well, sort of. Come on," she said as she headed into the house. Maura was a little confused but dutifully followed. She raised an eyebrow when she saw Jane stop at a hall closet and pulled out a couple of blankets. She then headed up the stairway with Maura in tow. She stopped in the hallway and reached up to pull down the ladder for the attic.

"Jane?"

"Just trust me Maur," she said snickering as she helped Maura up the ladder.

"I do," she answered with a smile.

Once in the attic Jane went to a window and undid the latch. She opened the window and climbed out disappearing. Maura stood there unsure of what to do until she heard Jane call out for her. She walked to the window and looked out. There was relatively flat roof under the window so she started to step out and was happy to find Jane there ready to assist. Once on the roof Jane led Maura over to where she had laid down the blankets.

"This is where you watched the fireworks every year?"

Jane nodded as they both sat down on the blankets. "Best seats in town. You'll see."

"And your grandparents let you and your brothers just hang out on the roof of the house? That's not exactly safe Jane."

"Maura, we weren't jumping off the roof. We got to come up here once a summer to see the fireworks. It was my Grandpa's idea. It's safe. I promise. The fireworks should start in about 10 minutes."

They relaxed and laid back on the blankets both looking up at the night sky. Jane felt Maura's proximity next to her. The events of the day played through her mind and she couldn't help but smile. She had kissed Maura. She had told Maura she loved her. And more amazingly Maura had kissed her back.

"Maura?" Jane asked as she propped herself up with her elbow turning to Maura.

"Yes?"

Jane reached out and cradled Maura's face in her free hand. She let her thumb brush across Maura's cheek. "Can I kiss you again?"

Maura released a sigh and turned into Jane's hand. "Jane, you never have to ask that."

Jane leaned in slowly and let her lips graze Maura's. The move wasn't tentative it was deliberate. Jane was taking her time letting her lips trace a path around Maura's. After she worked her way in a full circle she captured Maura's lower lip into her own. Maura moaned into the kiss as it picked up intensity.

Maura's lips parted as she worked them against the movement of Jane's. The two were starting to get a feel for each other and what each responded to. Maura felt Jane's tongue seeking entrance to her mouth and she immediately granted access. There wasn't a struggle for dominance. There was a simple but passionate dance between them.

The exploration didn't stay confined to lips. Jane curled further into Maura and their kiss continued as Maura's hand reached out and slid around Jane's hip in an effort to pull her in closer. Both ladies were now on their sides pressing their bodies against each other. Lips and hands continued to familiarize themselves with the woman in front of them. So completely absorbed in the passion of the moment neither lady even noticed the spectacular fireworks that had begun to light up the sky.

R&I

"_The body of an unidentified male was found in an alleyway in the Back Bay off Exeter St. Police are not releasing any of the details but they have established a police tip line. Police have requested that if anyone has any information concerning the case they should contact the number on the screen."_

All the news stations carried a similar version of the report. It was buried in the broadcast running as the third or fourth story after the first commercial break. No real attention to the crimes. Not even a hint that there was a previous body found. All that was given was a tip line number.

A tip line. That wasn't news. That wasn't details on who the victims were or how they were killed. That wasn't a call for the police to answer for why it was happening or what it all meant. That wasn't recognition that something bigger was happening. That wasn't the first calls for caution. That wasn't going to insight any fear or panic. A tip line. That's all that was given.

That was completely unacceptable. Clearly it was going to take more. And more would be delivered.


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11

The light from the window seemed to pour into the room turning it into an unintended alarm clock. Maura went to stretch and roll over but found her movements were limited. For a brief moment she was confused until she realized that what was impeding her was the weight of both an arm and a leg that seemed to be draped across her. The arm rested firmly but comfortably across her stomach and the leg was covering and crossed over her own. The extra body parts belonged to the sleeping beauty that was snuggled up against her.

Jane.

Careful to not wake the woman sleeping next to her Maura relaxed into the pillows and slowly let the events of the night before play back through her mind. She couldn't help but smile. Images of carnivals, boat rides and rooftop fireworks danced through her head. It had been an excellent day. But it had been a magical night. All the evidence Maura needed to confirm that was laying draped across her mildly snoring in a completely adorable way.

She had kissed Jane. Jane had kissed her. And somewhere in all of that each had been able to say 'I love you' and mean it more than just in a friendly way.

Maura wanted to relive it all. Each moment from the day prior seemed to build upon itself with the intention of leading both women to the very place Maura now rested. What was supposed to have been a simple weekend exertion had turned into some much more. Unexpected by both Maura was sure. But certainly not unwanted.

Maura had hoped for a day like yesterday for what felt like forever. She long ago realized that her feelings for Jane were beyond friendship. She was even fairly certain Jane felt the same for her. But she had let the fear of losing Jane keep her from asking for more. But that never kept her from wanting more. More time with Jane. More contact and touch from Jane. More of Jane. And after last night, Maura now believed she was going to get that more she so desired.

Jane stirred but didn't wake. Her arm shifted across Maura's stomach and the sensation made Maura smile. Thoughts of Jane's hands roaming across her body drifted through her mind. If she concentrated she could almost feel Jane's lips on hers. The night had no hesitations. No regrets. Well, maybe one regret as Maura flashed to the decision to slow things down and take it slow. It was the right thing to do but Maura had wanted all of Jane last night.

She absently reached out and lightly stroked her hand up and down the arm that rested over her. She was free to do this now. That feeling was liberating. They had shared a bed before. But there was always that space that divided their territory. Maura struggled at times not to cross that space. She was always awake before Jane and there were mornings she wanted to do nothing more than curl herself around Jane and hold her. But it wasn't allowed so she never let it happen. This morning, however, there was no space. No division. They were one tangled ensemble of flesh and body parts. It was an amazing way to wake up.

"You can't possibly be awake already," Jane groaned. "Is Sunday. Sunday is sleep-in day. Go back to sleep."

Maura chuckled, "It's 7:00. That is sleeping in for me."

"We are going to have to work on your idea of sleeping in," Jane said letting a smile cross her face but still refusing to open her eyes. Instead she tightened her grip about Maura's waist and pulled her in closer. "Close your eyes and go back to sleep."

Maura nestled into Jane's embrace. "I think I'll just enjoy this for a little while," she said as she resumed the stroking motion over Jane's arm.

Jane, still refusing to fully wake, gave another squeeze around Maura's waist. "You get to have this all the time now. Sleep."

It was a simple statement. But the reality of it hit Maura. She did get to have this now. More mornings waking up with Jane in her arms. More stolen moments of tender interactions. Just more.

"Maura?" Jane's voice was smaller and filled with sleep.

"Yes?"

"Thank you…" and there was a pause. Maura was about to ask what she meant but she didn't need to as Jane finished her thought. "…for not being a dream."

"This is so much better than a dream," she answered back quietly but was pretty sure Jane didn't hear her as she had fallen back asleep.

R&I

The smell of coffee was what woke Jane the second time. She was disappointed that the space next to her was now empty and cold but she wasn't surprised. Maura was an early riser and she guessed her pleas for Maura to go back to sleep had done no good. Reluctantly she admitted it was time to get up. She stretched and tried to savor the last few moments of warmth that only a blanketed bed seem to supply and finally got up.

She headed down the stairs expecting to find Maura in the kitchen. She found coffee but no Maura. She looked around and noticed the front door was open and saw Maura sitting out on the front porch. She poured herself a cup of coffee and wandered out to see Maura.

"Good morning," the doctor greeted Jane with a smile.

"For the record, 7 am is not sleeping in," she said returning the smile. "What are you doing out here?"

"It seemed like too beautiful of a morning to be sitting inside. It's so quiet here."

"Yeah, even at the height of the tourist season this is a pretty quiet neighborhood. I forgot how relaxing this place can be." Jane took a seat in the chair next to Maura.

"When were you here last?" Maura asked. She vaguely remembered others mentioning it had been a few years.

"It's been awhile. Couple years at least." Jane dropped her eyes for a moment. It was subtle but Maura caught it. Jane recovered quickly and looked back up at Maura. "It seemed to be easier to find the time to come up here when my grandparents were still alive."

"Thank you for showing me this place and this part of your past." The sincerity in Maura's tone was touching. Jane rarely offered up so much of her life before Maura. She wondered about what it was that she just hit on but decided not to push Jane about it.

"I'm sorry our trip is so short. Maybe next time we can plan the stay to be for more than a quick weekend."

Maura sighed. "Do we have to go back today?" A part of her had the desire to stay there and enjoy the peace and quiet.

"Sorry Doc. But we need to head back. Work awaits both of us. I still have a John Doe I need to identify and figure out what happened to him. You will have to follow-up on whatever wandered into your morgue over the weekend. And Ma will be expecting us for dinner. Reality awaits us back in Boston."

R&I

Jane made them breakfast and got cleaned up while Maura tackled the dishes. Then Jane packed up the car while Maura got ready. Given Maura's shopping spree that the fair Jane a harder time situating all of the bags and purchases. She made a mental note to wait to unload the car until Frankie and Tommy could help at dinner later.

As fast as they had arrived, they were leaving. The trip seemed too fast for them both but there really wasn't anything they could do about that. What they both needed was to talk about what the trip and the previous night meant for them going forward. They both knew 'the talk' was coming. And they both correctly figured it would be what occupied them on the drive back to Boston.

If Jane needed a hint that conversation was on the agenda she got it the minute Maura turned off the radio in the car.

"So…." Jane started but stopped.

"So…." Maura countered.

Conversation had always been easy for them. Comfortable and never forced. That was one of the things Maura noticed from the day she met Jane. Usually her interactions with people were erratic and uncomfortable. But with Jane it was just natural. Easy. Jane had been the first person she could remember that didn't shy away from trying to have a casual conversation. Their comfort with each other should make discussing their future easier.

Jane smiled. "Do you have any idea how this all works? Because I sure don't."

"How what all works?"

"Us. You and me. I'm not sure how to go about all of this. Are you?"

"Not exactly. But I know what I want so that's a start."

"What do you want?" Jane looked at Maura expectantly.

"You. Us," she gazed back at Jane and smiled.

"So do I but how do we do that?"

"Jane, it doesn't have to be complicated. We spend time together. We get to know each other."

"But that's just it, we already spend time together. We already know each other."

"We know each other as friends. After yesterday I would say that it's clear we both want more than friendship. That takes time Jane. Time together. As much as you think you know about me, you don't know everything. Just like I don't know everything about you."

"So what, we 'date'?" Jane's brow crinkled as she said it.

Maura chuckled. "You say that like it's a bad thing. Jane dating doesn't have to be this elaborate notion. It doesn't have to be grand romantic gestures. I honestly believe that if we don't get hung up in titles or preconceived notions that all of this should really take care of itself."

Jane was quiet for a minute thinking about that. Maura was right. They did only know each other as friends. And she did want more. So much more.

"Ok, how about we just take this one day at a time then?"

"That, Detective, is something I think we can manage."

R&I

Two bodies hadn't been enough to trigger the desired response. The chain reaction. The media attention just wasn't there. They couldn't, or wouldn't, even link the two bodies as related cases. It had to be because Rizzoli wasn't the lead detective for the second body. The detective never responded to the crime scene for the second body so she must not have been assigned to the case. She needed to be assigned to the case. It was time to make that happen.

It was time to start the introduction. The laptop responded immediately to being turned on. The Word document opened and the screen began to fill at the pace of the clicks and clacks from fingers hitting the keyboard. The words were easy. There was a passion and a belief behind what was being written and it flowed quickly. Both documents would be written in no time.

The first was a preview. A warning of things to come. The length was short and done deliberately to match people's attention span. The audience would be lost if the explanations were too involved. Too detailed. That would be saved for later. A 'manifesto' seemed to be the popular name for what would be the full version of the vision. Of the reality. But it wasn't time for the whole truth. Not yet. This first document was just a glimpse. The first document would just set the tone for the future.

The second was a message. It was a message specifically for her. She would read it and she would understand it. She would show them the message. There would be no way they would keep her off the second case once they read it. The detective needed to be on both cases. She was the key to it all. The answers couldn't be found unless she worked on them both. The end game couldn't be reached without her.

Once the prose was finished the documents were printed. The message for the detective was carefully folded and placed into a self-adhesive envelope. The preview was placed in a separate envelope. Also a self-adhesive envelope. No trace of DNA would be found. They would check. They would check for it all. Precautions had been taken. No DNA. No prints. No links back. Not yet.

There would be no handwriting either. Both envelopes being used had the address information pre-printed. Too smart to make the small mistakes. It was always the little things that foiled the plans people made. And everything was planned. Everything was laid out. It had all gone according to that plan with the exception of the detective. But these packages would fix that.

The packages were ready. Delivery would be easy. FedEx made it easy. Almost too easy. Overnight guaranteed delivery. The FedEx supplies had been purchases weeks ago. Paid for with cash. From a location in another state. They wouldn't be able to back trace the packages. They would try. But it wouldn't help them.

Guaranteed overnight delivery. By this time tomorrow the game would change. By this time tomorrow the players would be right.


	12. Chapter 12

Chapter 12

It took Tommy, Frankie and Jane three trips to unload the car. Jane was glad she had waited until the guys could help. She had been joking about a hernia on Friday but if she had to unload everything Maura either brought or bought by herself the hernia could have been a possibility.

"Jeez Maura, what did you do buy one of everything at the fair?" Frankie asked as he made his way up the stairs on what was their second trip.

"It wasn't one of everything. There were plenty of things I didn't purchase," she answered not really getting that Frankie was joking.

Angela smiled, "I'm glad you had a good time at the festival. I haven't been there in years."

Angela and Maura were in the kitchen working on dinner while Jane and the boys were bringing in everything from the car. Jane was convinced they were hiding in the kitchen to avoid helping to bring in the haul.

"It was exciting. I'd never been to a carnival or a fair before," Maura said turning her attention from Frankie to Angela.

It was statements like what Maura had just said that broke Angela's heart. She knew Maura's childhood was different than what she would have considered normal. She was aware that Maura's parents were not as emotionally involved with her as Angela was with her kids. But she always wanted to believe Maura was at least happy as a child. The thought that she had never been to a fair or a carnival pulled at Angela's belief about Maura's actual level of happiness.

Looking at Maura, Angela's eyes softened. "Well, I'm glad Jane decided to take you then. Everyone should experience that at least once in their life. Besides the shopping you clearly were able to do," Angela snickered as Jane walked past her carrying the last of the items from the car, "what else did you guys do?"

Jane paused at the top of the stairs out of sight but not out of earshot. They hadn't talked about whether they were going to tell people they were progressing in their relationship. She had no idea what Maura was going to say to Angela. One of the things Jane loved most about Maura was her inability to lie without breaking out in hives. There was an excellent chance that her mother was about to find out that they had kissed. She lingered waiting for Maura's answers while holding her breath.

"We had dinner at a diner in town Friday night," Maura started.

"Oh, did you meet Mr. Andrews?" Angela asked.

"Yes, I did. And I even had the meatloaf sandwich. It was excellent."

"Jane's suggestion?" Angela asked knowing Maura wouldn't have picked that off the menu.

Maura nodded, "She said it was the house specialty. On Saturday, we walked through the fair. Then we took a boat ride for lunch and a tour of the lake. It is absolutely gorgeous up there."

"So Jane took you out on her Uncle Sam's boat?"

"Yes she did," Maura said and smiled. She moved from the kitchen island over to the refrigerator opening it up and removing three beers and two waters. She put out the beers on the island knowing Tommy, Frankie and Jane would want them when they came back down from upstairs. She handed a water to Angela and took the other one for herself. "After the boat tour we walked through the carnival and then watched the fireworks."

Jane still stood standing at the top of the stairs. So far Maura hadn't even hinted at what happened on the boat or up on the roof. She was frozen and couldn't get herself to move until she knew what Maura would or wouldn't say.

"It sounds like you had a full day yesterday," Angela said.

Maura smiled a cryptic smile. She turned away from Angela hoping she wouldn't notice. Maura had no intention of discussing the change in her relationship with Jane this early into it. And she had no desire to be the one to inform Angela of any of what had occurred over the weekend. She was hoping she would be able to get through Angela's questions without a specific question she couldn't work around the details. So far she had managed just that.

"It was a full day. But I did have a good time."

Tommy and Frankie blew past Jane and headed down the stairs. Each claimed a beer and went to go relax in front of Maura's television. Jane smiled as she realized Maura wasn't going to say anything about the change in their relationship and started back down the stairs. She wondered what her mother's reaction would have been had Maura said something. She also wondered what her own reaction would have been.

"Ok, I'm not carrying another thing up those stairs for at least 24 hours," Jane announced as she entered the kitchen to join Maura and her mother. Both the women snickered as Jane picked up and opened her beer.

"You are off duty for the rest of the evening Detective," Maura kidded. "Go join the guys and relax. Your mother and I are handling dinner. Frost and Korsak should be here soon."

"Works for me," Jane said and retreated from the kitchen.

Angela looked at Maura. "So what was your favorite part of the trip?"

Maura turned away from Angela again. This was close to the type of question she was trying to avoid. She took a breath and turned back to Angela. "It was Jane."

Angela did a double take at Maura when she heard that. Her curiosity now fully intrigued.

"Jane doesn't share much about her life, her past, with me," Maura continued.

"With anyone Maura," Angela offered up.

"True. But this weekend, I got to see a side of her I haven't seen before. She shared a piece of her childhood with me and of everything that happened this weekend, that by far, is what meant the most to me."

Maura met Angela's smile with one of her own but hers was almost one of pride as not a hive was to be found on the woman.

R&I

Frost and Korsak arrived for Rizzoli Sunday dinner about thirty minutes later. Greetings for the newly arrived detectives came from the guys and Jane watching TV in Maura's living room as well as from Maura and Angela in the kitchen. Jane stood up when the two entered the living room.

"Hey guys. What can I get you to drink?" she asked.

"Don't be so quick to offer him anything partner," Frost said with mock anger.

Jane looked from Frost to Korsak and was clearly confused. Looking at Vince she asked him, "What did you do?"

"I didn't do anything. It was Cavanaugh," Korsak said defensively.

"Alright, what did he do?" she asked still looking between Frost and Korsak.

"We have a second John Doe case," Frost answered before Korsak could say something else.

"What?!" Jane couldn't contain her surprise. "We've been off for the weekend. We can't have another case," she said and turned her attention to Korsak clearly not happy. "Korsak?" she questioned now clearly waiting for an answer.

"Crowe and Rodriguez picked up a John Doe on Friday night. I had to babysit the scene until they could get there so I supervised the initial processing. Saturday Cavanaugh reassigned the case to you."

"Why? The rule is the rule. That should be Crowe's case not ours. I already have a John Doe case that we are nowhere on." Jane didn't understand why she was getting another case.

"It's because of your JD that you get this latest one. We don't have any more on the ID for this new one than we have on your first one but they are connected."

"Connected? How?"

"Ballistics came back and the gun used to shoot your JD was the same gun used to shoot Crowe's. That's the link. And Cavanaugh wants you on both cases. Sorry Jane."

"Ugh! I can't even take a weekend off," she huffed. It wasn't Korsak's fault but he was an easy target for Jane to take her frustration out on. "A second JD? For the record, this completely sucks."

"I know. But they are related and Cavanaugh wants one team doing the investigation. You drew the short straw."

R&I

Dinner was relaxing and pleasant. It had become a weekly tradition that everyone enjoyed. The extended Rizzoli family always had plenty to talk about at the dinner table so there was never a lull in conversation.

After dinner ended the guys all headed home conveniently skipping out on the clean-up duties. It was typical. Jane never saw four grown men scatter faster than when it was clear that the meal at Maura's house was close to being finished. Korsak and Frost had both agreed to go into work early with Jane so they could review the JD #2 case and look at both JDs to see if they could get an idea about what had happened.

"Ma, sit down. I've got this," Jane said to Angela when she tried to start clearing the table. "You know the routine."

Angela smiled. She did know the routine. She cooked, Maura hosted, Jane handled the cleanup. As a system, it worked out well for all three of them. "Fair enough," Angela said and relinquished the dish she started to pick up. "If you girls have this, I think I'm going to turn in for the night."

"We got this Ma," Jane said and smirked. "And by 'we' I mean me." She let her eyes wander over to Maura who looked very relaxed sitting at the dining room table. So relaxed Jane was sure she was going to get as much help with the cleanup as she got when she hauled everything in from the car earlier.

Angela got up and attempted to hug Jane. Jane managed to wiggle out of the embrace and retreat into the kitchen. The move just made Angela smile. That had been their routine for years. She knew Jane loved her but she had always squirmed away from hugs. She wandered over to Maura and gently kissed her forehead. Maura was family and Angela viewed her as nothing less than a daughter. "Good night, Maura."

Maura smiled at Angela's gesture. So sweet. So motherly. She loved her parents but the affection she felt for Angela was completely different from the love she had for Constance. Angela was brazen with her love for her children. She was loud and intrusive. But she was involved. It all came from love and Maura had often envied the displays of affection Angela so willingly gave her children but now enjoyed the fact that she was a part of that inner circle. "Good night Angela."

Fulfilling Jane's prophecy, Maura stayed seated and comfortable while Jane finished the cleanup. It wasn't that she didn't want to help Jane with the process. It was that she found herself mesmerized with the detective. Maura had struggled all evening to remain calm and nonchalant. She caught herself several times during dinner just watching Jane. She was captivated. Jane's fluidity and grace in her movements. How her eyes sparkled and reacted as the others spoke or told stories. How animated she was with her hands when she spoke.

Maura had seen all those things in Jane before. But before she hadn't been allowed to appreciate them the way she could in that moment. Things were different now. She could sit at her dining room table and take in the sight of the woman she loved. She no longer needed to fear her reactions or her weaknesses. She no longer needed to worry that Jane would catch a look or a phrase that Maura meant but had not intended for others to see. Gone were the concerns that one of her stolen glances would trigger the unwanted domino effect of Jane running from her. All of that was gone. And what was now left felt like a dream come true.

"Stay," Maura said quietly as Jane reentered the dining room.

Jane looked up and was greeted by a look and a smile that instantly made her weak in the knees. She cleared her suddenly dry throat. "What?"

"Stay." This time it was louder and certainly more seductive.

Jane stood looking at Maura but didn't answer. They hadn't talked at all about that night. Jane hadn't even stopped to consider if she should go home or stay at Maura's. It was clear what Maura wanted. There was no mistaking the look she now had on her face.

"Maur," she started hesitantly. "Are you sure?" She wasn't asking if Maura was sure if she should stay at the house. She understood what Maura wanted. She was asking if Maura was sure she should stay with Maura for the night. They had stopped last night on the roof before it passed that point of no return. Both had agreed that it was too soon. How had a day really made a difference?

Maura saw the hesitation in Jane's face. She stood up and slowly walked to Jane. She reached out and took one of Jane's hands in hers. She held it in both of hers giving it a gentle squeeze before bringing it up to her lips where she gave the palm of the hand a soft kiss. "I've never been more sure of anything in my life. Stay with me."

Jane's breathing hitched and she was weak in the knees once again. She went to speak but the words wouldn't come. Instead, she acquiesced and let Maura lead her out of the dining room and towards the stairs. As they made their way up the stairs some of the words finally came to Jane.

"I love you."

R&I

Jane took a deep breath and knocked. The simple fact that she did knock instead of walking right in made her smile. If the roles were reversed she was certain she wouldn't have been on the receiving end of courtesy knock.

"Janie?" Angela asked not hiding her surprise to see her daughter standing at her door at 6 am holding two cups of coffee. "Is everything alright?" She unexplained appearance and at this hour in the morning had Angela convinced something was wrong.

"Everything's fine Ma. Can I come in?" she asked refusing to enter the guesthouse until Angela said it was alright.

Angela stepped aside and watched as Jane entered and headed for the kitchen. She put both cups of coffee the kitchen counter and waited for Angela to follow her into the kitchen.

"Thank you," Angela said as she took the cup of coffee. She had seen the look on Jane's face only a few times in her life. Jane needed to talk. She had an idea what this might be about but she knew Jane would have to control how the conversation went.

Jane leaned up against the counter and didn't say anything for a minute. To her credit, Angela didn't force the conversation. That fact alone made Jane realize that her mother understood she needed to talk about something.

However, Jane seemed to s freeze in that moment. Not for fear of asking what she wanted to ask but for fear of not asking it in the right way.

Angela tried to take the pressure off Jane by ending the silence. She had held out as long as she could. "I was a little surprised you took Maura to Laconia. When you called to ask me to see if the house was available it was the last thing I expected."

"Maura had never been to a fair and the timing worked out. It was always the best fair in the area. That hasn't changed."

"No, I suppose it hasn't. It's just that since...well it had been a long time since you went up there. Maura clearly enjoyed it."

"I think so. But that's not what I wanted to talk to you about." Jane needed to stay focused and not get sidetracked on an entirely different topic. She took a deep breath and tried to start the conversation she actually wanted to have. "Ma, can I ask you something?" It was a weak start but at least it was in fact a start.

"Sure," Angela said and waited.

"If…..would…..is….," she tried a few times to start but couldn't seem to find the words she wanted to use. She released a heavy sigh and tried again. "If I told you that there was someone I cared about and wanted to be a part of my life…if it was someone I was considering getting involved with…would you have an issue if that person was a woman?"

Jane was nervous to have this conversation but not petrified. She had always believed that her mother only wanted her to be happy and she was pretty sure that would include her being ok with her sexuality. But, they had never really talked about it. In fact, Jane had never really talked about it with anyone. She had never really labeled herself before never seeing the need. But she needed to know if her mother would accept a relationship with Maura.

Angela stood in the kitchen and listened to the words coming from Jane's mouth. She honestly never believed she would hear that coming from Jane. Not that she was surprised by the question. She was surprised Jane finally asked. She couldn't stop the smile that worked its way across her face. "Jane, do you really have to ask me that?"

"I need to know for sure Ma."

"Sweetheart, if you were to tell me that there was someone that you thought you could be with and be happy, I wouldn't care what gender, or race, or age, or look or anything else you could name. I would care about one thing. And one thing only. All I would need to know is if that person was special enough to deserve you in their life."

Jane released the breath she was holding and allowed herself to smile. "And if she is special enough?"

"Then I would tell you that I agree with you. And that I think Maura is very lucky to have you."

Jane looked up at her mother and she couldn't say that she was surprised. Angela was a very astute woman. It was one of the reasons Jane was talking with her this early into this change with Maura. Jane knew it would only be a matter of time before Angela figured it out on her own and she had wanted to tell her before that happened.

"I'm the lucky one, Ma." She didn't even try to hide the smile as it traveled across her face.


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Jane had been right about the press. She was happy to find that they had moved on to other stories. One of the few things that could be truly counted on in life was that the press seemed to have a short attention span. After she left her mother's that morning her made a quick stop at her apartment and had been thrilled that there were no signs of any reporters or news cameras lurking.

She got to the station and was equally happy to see that there was no media loitering outside of the station either. She had done a quick review of the morning papers and hadn't seen a single story on the incident from the coffee shop or any secondary stories about her. She parked her car and entered the station believing that the press would stay away from her for a while and things could get back to normal for once.

The bullpen was quiet for that early in the morning. Most of the detectives wouldn't be for about another hour or so. But tucked away in the far corner of the pen three heads all sat looking at a white board. All three trying to find the one thing that neither of them could find so far. A connection. There were just too many unknowns for any connection other than the murder weapon to be found.

Jane had reviewed the file for John Doe #2 and it read eerily similar to that of her original JD. No ID, no cell, no keys to anything. Found in an alley in the Back Bay. Nicely dressed and no signs of a physical struggle. Clean shave, clean clothes, manicured fingernails. Similar GSW from the same .22 to the upper chest region. The same non-fatal GSW and the same cause of death: exsanguination.

So far no fibers or hairs were found on the body or JD #2's clothes. Tox screen was negative. But similar dirt particulates were found under the fingernail on JD #2 as had been found on JD #1. According to Dr. O'Malley's report the amount of blood found at the crime scene was inconsistent with the cause of death. JD #2 bled out but not in the alley. The alley wasn't the crime scene it was the drop zone. Same as JD #1.

Jane hated cases that left her with more questions than answers. And that was all she had with these two cases. Questions. And not a single answer. Who were these two? Did they know each other? Why were they dumped in alleys in the Back Bay? Why the nonfatal GSW? Was it deliberate? Did the killer want the victims to bleed out as punishment?

"One JD was bad enough," sighed Jane in frustration. "But a second one makes this almost impossible. What are we not seeing?" Jane had always been convinced the answer could be found within the given evidence. The clues were always there if a person just knew where to look. But it had been a long time since she was this behind in a case. She was nowhere.

"Until we can positively ID either one of them there is no way I can retrace their movements leading up to time of death for either of them." Frost seemed even more frustrated than Jane. He was stuck too. His expertise had evolved into electronic analysis. He was gifted in his ability to trace the details of a person's life finding and following all the bread crumbs a cell phone, credit card or social media handle left behind. But they had none of that for the moment. And it was driving Frost crazy.

"And no one has filed a Missing Person for our JD #1 yet? It's been four days. I thought for sure someone would report this kid missing by now." Korsak looked at Jane as he spoke.

Jane shook her head. "There's nothing even close to matching #1 or #2 in the reports. But, we are coming off of a weekend so if family thought either one was just away for a trip then maybe…." she paused and stared at the white board again.

Both Frost and Korsak recognized the look on Jane's face. She had an idea. And that look usually meant a break in a case. They waited for her to finish the thought not willing to interrupt wherever her head had gone.

"Frost?"

"Yeah?"

"Run Missing Person's reports for the last 30 days," she started.

"Jane, we've tried that already." Korsak interrupted.

"I know. Frost, run the query again. Exclude Massachusetts this time as we've seen those. Run Missing Person's reports for males approximately 18-25 years old for New York, Connecticut, New Hampshire, Maine, Vermont and Rhode Island."

Frost nodded and opened a database and started typing away.

Korsak looked at Jane. "You think they are from out of state?"

Jane tilted her head to the side as she considered it. "Possibly. Korsak, our JD #1 gave no indication that he was a runaway or homeless. Clean clothes, manicured fingernails, well-nourished and healthy. He's never been in any trouble. His prints aren't on file anyway. Our JD #1 was not some forgotten kid. So if no one in Boston has reported him missing yet maybe it's because he isn't from Boston. Or Massachusetts."

"It's possible Jane."

"It may be all we have," Jane said not hiding her frustration.

"Alright, excluding Massachusetts and focusing in on males between 18-25 in the surrounding states we have 37 possibilities."

Jane shook her head. Thirty seven reported missing males in just the last thirty days from six states. A part of her didn't want to think about what had happened to them or the eleven from Massachusetts she had already looked at. "Alright, Frost send the reports to the BRIC and we can look at them there."

Korsak and Frost headed towards the BRIC while Jane pulled down the photos of both John Does. She hoped her hunch was right. The longer they went without identification for either victim the less likely Jane would ever be able to figure out who killed them and why.

Jane followed the guys into the BRIC and posted the pictures of both JDs up near the screen Frost was going to display the Missing Persons report photos. One by one Frost flashed up the photos he found as all three would look at the photo of the JD and the photo on the screen. The contrast of the photos was not lost on any of the three detectives. The harsh, cold lifeless faces from the morgue photos were in stark contradiction to the warm, expression filled photos that the families had provided the police for the reports.

They went through twenty six of the reports before they got their first hit. When Frost flashed the photo from the twenty seventh report up on the screen all three detectives saw the match immediately. "Guys," Jane was the first one to call it out. "Do you see this?"

"Yeah Jane. I see it. That looks like our JD #1," Frost said as he inched closer to screen.

Jane turned to Korsak and he was nodding his head. "I think your right Jane."

"Frost, pull the report." Jane requested.

Two clacks of the keyboard and the entire Missing Person's report for Brett Alan Jenkins displayed on the screen. Jenkins was 21 years old and from Providence, Rhode Island. He was a student at BCU and according to the Missing Person report he had enrolled for summer classes. Jane knew that BCU's summer session had ended two weeks ago and fall classes were not set to start for two more weeks.

"His father reported him missing when he failed to return home last weekend. According to this Jenkins was supposed to return to Providence in between class sessions. He had confirmed his return with his father but never came home. After three days of unreturned voicemails his father reported him missing."

"Frost, contact the Providence police and see what they have that could assist with identification. Let's get what they can to Maura to confirm our JD #1 is Jenkins before we make contact with the family."

"I'm on it," Frost said and he picked up the phone. Jane took over control of the computer Frost had been working and turned to Korsak. "Let's look at the last ten and see if there's a match for JD #2." Korsak nodded and they looked through the remaining ten photos. None of them were JD #2.

"It's early for JD #2 Jane. It's only been two days and it was a weekend. We may not get a hit until today or tomorrow."

Jane nodded and turned as Frost spoke. "Providence PD is sending over DNA results for Dr. Isles. They were able to get a hair sample from the father but the labs hadn't updated to CODIS yet. They are going to hold off informing the father until we confirm if our JD is Jenkins."

"Good. That's never something any of us should be wrong about. I'm going to head down to let Maura know that they are sending the DNA profile over. Frost, we've lost too much time already. Work off the assumption that Jenkins is our JD. Run everything you can think of about him. Let's try to get ahead of this a little."

R&I

Jane had a legitimate reason to be going down to the morgue. She did. She had to tell Maura about the DNA profile that the Providence PD was going to be sending over for her to use in a comparison with the first JD. She had to tell Maura that the profile could help possibly help with the identification. A completely legitimate reason to be riding down the elevator to see the ME. A completely, totally professional reason.

But as the elevator slowly worked its way down towards the morgue, Jane's completely professional reason for seeing the beautiful doctor faded quickly from her mind. Instead Jane's mind flashed back to the night before. Images of the night they spent together racing through her mind pushed off all thoughts of DNA and identification.

The night had been perfect. Both had given into their passion for each other. If Jane let herself concentrate enough she could still feel the sensations of Maura's lips and hands on her skin. Touching, caressing, possessing. If she really pushed herself she could still feel the warmth, weight and softness of Maura's body on hers. That electrical moment the first time there was full body skin on skin contact. If she let herself Jane could remember every single moment of the night before.

She felt her cheeks flush as the images continued to play out and she found that the elevator ride down to the morgue ended too soon. She needed a few seconds to compose herself before heading down the hallway. She wasn't trying to hide from Maura but she was trying not to walk about the precinct with a guilty but completely satisfied look on her face. It was for Maura as much as it was for Jane.

They had talked that morning about what they wanted to do. Neither had an overwhelming need to keep their relationship a secret. But both wanted to control the announcement of it all. Because of their friendship and the time they spent together both had to remind the other that the romantic side of their relationship was brand new. For them it felt like they had been together for years. And in some ways they had. But the progression of their feelings was something they decided they wanted to keep to themselves for a little while.

And for purely selfish reasons. As they had talked that morning both believed that family and friends would be fine with the two of them being together. They both knew that several already assumed there was a physical aspect between them already. Maura wasn't concerned about her parents and Jane had been confident that Angela would want what she wanted. Jane didn't doubt Frankie or Tommy's reaction either. And both women just knew Frost and Korsak would be happy for them.

So keeping quiet about where they now stood with each wasn't out of fear. It was out of a desire to get to enjoy each other without the interruptions of the others. The questions. The need for answers. Jane and Maura just wanted something of their own for a while. Something that was exclusively theirs to explore and enjoy. That wouldn't last forever. But they wanted it to last at least for a little while. So they agreed that they wouldn't tell anyone. Except Angela.

Jane knew her mother and knew she would be the first to figure out the change. She was willing to hold off until they were going to tell everyone but Maura was fine with Jane telling her sooner. Considering the fact that she lived in Maura's guesthouse both figured there would be no hiding their time together. And neither wanted the pressure of acting like they were just friends still while at home. At work it was understandable but at home they wanted to be free to express themselves without worrying about the next door neighbor.

So they agreed to no public displays of affection at work. To keep it professional. Walking down the hallway towards the ME's office Jane was silently cursing herself for agreeing to that rule. After last night her need to be with the doctor had only grown stronger. She was going to have to remind herself to behave. At least until they were home. She approached the morgue and composed herself before swinging the door open.

"Maura?" she called out looking around. She knew Maura would be in the lab. Maura liked Dr. O'Malley but she would be compelled to take a second look at what had been processed over the weekend including JD #2.

"Just a second," came a shout from Maura from the other room. A few minutes later she entered the lab greeting Jane with a smile. "Hi."

"Hey yourself," she said returning the smile. Completely professional was going to be very, very hard. And as Jane took in the sight of Maura she was going to have to mention that the black scrubs may have to go if they were going to stand a chance in hell of keeping it professional. Jane cleared her throat and tried to dismiss the thought that had just occurred to her. "You are going to be getting a fax from the Providence Police Department. It should be a DNA profile. Can you see you if can use it to identify my first JD?"

"Sure," she said and walked over towards her desktop to check for the e-fax. "Providence?"

"We think JD #1 was from there. I don't want to notify any family until we have a positive ID."

"I'll run the comparison as soon as I have the profile. I just checked and it's not there yet."

"Thanks," Jane said as she turned to look at JD #2. "Anything on our second victim?"

"Dr. O'Malley didn't miss anything that I can see. But like your first victim there wasn't much forensic evidence to recover. No fibers. No hairs. There were dirt particulates under the fingernails like the first victim. The lab report on that is not back yet. The GSW was very similar to the first victim and cause of death is exsanguination. The second scene was a dump site too."

"Ok. So we are still nowhere on the forensics outside of ballistics. I hate this case Maura," Jane sighed in frustration. "Can you let me know when you get the DNA profile results? I already have Frost running down who he might be but I need confirmation."

"As soon as I have it, you will know it," she said with a sympathetic smile. She knew Jane hated it when there was so little evidence to go on.

She was about to ask Jane how things went with Angela but Jane's phone vibrated. Jane pulled the phone away from her hip and read the two new text messages. She looked back up at Maura.

"I need to go. Frost has some initial information and apparently there's also a package delivery for me upstairs. Will you bring up the profile results when you get them?" She asked but was already heading towards the door.

"Yes," Maura answered to the back of Jane's head. She was about to go check for the e-fax again when she noticed Jane had turned around and was looking at her. "What?" she asked.

"I'll tell you details later but you….we….have the official Angela seal of approval," and with that she disappeared into the hallway leaving the doctor to stand in the lab with a goofy grin on her face and a desire to know all the details about the conversation.

R&I

Jane stopped at the first floor to check in with the desk sergeant. There was apparently a FedEx delivery for her. She stopped at the desk and chatted with the officer on duty for a minute before claiming the delivery. It was simply an overnight express envelope. Jane ended her chat with the officer and headed towards the elevators to get back up to the bullpen. Frost has also sent a message that he had some preliminaries on Brett Jenkins. She began to open the package in the elevator.

_Detective-  
'For all evils there are two remedies- time and silence'  
Time has run out for two already. Retribution achieved. Another life hangs in the balance. Do you have what it takes to find me? To stop me?  
In silence there can be no truth. Truth cloaked and hidden merely enables the lies and empowers the liars. End the silence. Reveal the truth.  
The city sees you as a hero. But that's not how you see yourself, is it Detective? Don't you think it's time you told them why?  
The clock is ticking. The end of this all depends on you. Will you fail this time too?  
Nemesis  
_

It was the look on her face that tipped them both off that something was wrong. "Jane? What is it?" Korsak asked looking concerned.

Jane had somehow managed to walk from the elevator to her desk. She didn't remember doing it but she was suddenly there. She didn't answer Korsak. Instead she reached into her desk drawer and pulled out two evidence bags and a single latex glove. She didn't put on the glove but she used it to pick up the FedEx envelope and placed that into the first evidence bag.

"Jane?" Frost tried but didn't get much of reaction from Jane either. "What are you reading partner?"

She didn't answer Frost either. She used the latex glove to place the letter itself into the second evidence bag. By now the fact that Jane was bagging evidence and not responding to either of them had Korsak and Frost circling around her desk trying to get an idea of what was going on.

"Jane?"

Jane read the letter again to make sure she understood what it meant. She then looked up at Frost and Korsak. "Guys, we have a problem."

R&I

The door chime alert indicated that there was email waiting to be read. Two clicks of the mouse on the laptop opened the just delivered email. It was the tracking notification from FedEx. The package delivered to the detective had been signed for and would by now have been read and understood.

Five minutes later a second door chime alert sounded. Another email had arrived and the same two clicks were employed to view that message. Again, it was the tracking notification from FedEx. The second package had just been delivered and signed for by Belinda Simmons.

It was all starting to come together. The detective and the media liaison. Together again. Even if they didn't realize that yet.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

Belinda Simmons wasn't expecting any packages. Based on what had happened over the last few days she wasn't expecting much of anything. Her suddenly unemployment had freed up time on her schedule which she had no idea how to fill. Her plan had been to reach out to several media outlets that morning to test the waters on employment opportunities. But she hadn't really started that process yet. So when the knock on her door found the FedEx man standing outside it was the last thing she had expected.

She signed for the package and shut the door behind her. There was no return address on the package or any other markings that would indicate who the sender was and although part of her should have registered caution she didn't really think about the package being a threat to her. It wasn't that thick and it seemed harmless. She opened the package as she walked back into her apartment. She got as far as the hallway just outside her living room before she stopped dead in her tracks.

The package contained two envelopes. Belinda cracked open the first envelope, the heavier one, and pulled on the edge of the sheets inside. She realized the sheets were photographs and before she pulled them all the way out to review she did a quick check of the second envelope. In the second envelope she found a single page. She pulled that all the way out to read primarily because it seemed quicker.

'_And now farewell kindness, humanity and gratitude! Farewell to all the feelings that expand the heart! I have been heaven's substitute to rewarding the good- now the god of vengeance yields to me his power to punish the wicked!'  
Innocence destroyed with four to blame. Justice denied with one to blame. A life forgotten and all to blame. Two held accountable with two more to go. Retribution is inevitable.  
The media can be a powerful sword. It can make the innocent guilty and the guilty innocent. You now must decide which way it points. The choice is yours but the vengeance is mine._

Belinda's hands trembled as she turned her attention to the photographs. She fought with her nerves that were preventing her from pulling the pictures from the envelope. She was afraid to see what they revealed. In seconds her fears were confirmed. The images were unmistakable to her. Just looking at the first one had an immediate impact on the media liaison. The first glimpse of the photos caused such a wave of nausea that she barely had time to get to the kitchen sink before she threw up.

"Oh my God!" she muttered out loud.

R&I

Jane, Frost and Korsak huddled around Jane's desk looking at the note that had been delivered to her. Each had lost count of the number of times they had read it attempting to decipher its meaning.

"Jane?" Korsak started. "Does this make any sense to you at all?"

Jane looked from Korsak to Frost and back again. "No….sort of….maybe…." she was at a loss to fully comprehend what she had just read. She understood enough of it to know it was related to her two John Does. She got the reference to another person being in jeopardy. But the rest of the message didn't make much sense to her. "Pieces of this make sense to me. But some of this I have no idea."

"Frost, scan the letter and put it up on the screen," Korsak said to him.

"We need to get the letter and the envelope to the lab for analysis. Also we need to try to back trace the delivery. Get with FedEx and see if we can determine where this package was shipped from and how the overnight delivery was paid for," Jane threw at Frost.

To his credit Frost handled the multi-tasking well. He had the letter up on the screen, a lab tech was coming up to get the envelope and letter and he was already working on FedEx's website trying to trace the shipping of the envelope.

Jane and Korsak turned their attention to the note letting Frost handle the trace. Jane tried to review the message in its entirety again but wasn't getting anywhere. They needed to breakdown the message. "Let's take this piece at a time," Jane said.

'_For all evils there are two remedies- time and silence'_

Both Korsak and Jane looked at each other. Korsak started, "There are single quotations around this so it could be an actual quote. But it's nothing I recognize."

"I don't recognize it either. When Frost is done with the packaging he can run the line. Otherwise I would say our sender is suggesting that evil is helped by the passage of time and by silence. But I don't have any context to understand what the evil is."

_Time has run out for two already. Retribution achieved. Another life hangs in the balance. Do you have what it takes to find me? To stop me?_

"Now this part makes since to me. The two could be our John Does. Their murder is retribution for something. A warning that there is another potential victim and a challenge for me to find the killer and stop him." Jane looked at Korsak who nodded his agreement to her observation on the statement.

"Without an ID on our John Does there is no way we are going to be able to figure out what they may have done that required retribution," Korsak observed. "This part seems to suggest the sender is some sort of vigilante."

_In silence there can be no truth. Truth cloaked and hidden merely enables the lies and empowers the liars. End the silence. Reveal the truth. _

"This statement makes partial sense to me," Korsak volunteered. "Clearly the sender thinks someone, possibly you, knows a truth about something but has been kept quiet. The sender wants the truth to come out."

"I agree and it adds to the vigilante feel. But what truth?" asked Frost who was finished with the FedEx information request.

Jane shook her head. "I don't know." Her mind was racing up there wasn't anything specific she could pinpoint.

_The city sees you as a hero. But that's not how you see yourself, is it Detective? Don't you think it's time you told them why?_

Both Frost and Korsak looked at Jane. There was no mistaking this part of the note was specifically directed towards Jane.

"Jane?" Frost tried quietly.

This was the part that bothered Jane the most about the note. She didn't mind the first specific call out to her. The challenge issued by the sender asking if Jane could stop him. But this, this was personal. This seemed to suggest that the sender knew Jane's inner most thoughts and that suggestion seemed ridiculous to her. "Whoever this is seems to believe that he knows me. Or thinks he knows something about me," Jane said staring at the screen.

"Do you know what he is referring to? What you should tell us?"

"Vince, I don't know what this is about," she said. For a moment the thought occurred to her but she dismissed it as being impossible.

_The clock is ticking. The end of this all depends on you. Will you fail this time too?_

"Fail? How does it depend on me? Finding the killer or saving the next potential victim or both? And what did I fail at?" she didn't try to hide her frustration. "How did I become part of all of this?"

"I don't know Jane. But if I'm reading this right the sender seems to be admitting to killing our two JDs. Apparently there is at least one other target and time is running out for us to stop him." Frost's recap correctly summarized what Jane and Korsak believed. All three were in agreement. Half the message was clear. Half the message cryptic. But it was the cryptic part that worried Jane.

There were the points she understood. She was being challenged to find the killer. What she didn't understand was the parts that were personal. It felt like the sender believed Jane had a secret she wasn't sharing. "I get that but what about the rest of this? Secrets, time, lies….what does it all mean? If someone is going to go to the trouble of sending me a note why would they send me something that I don't understand?"

_Nemesis_

As Jane re-read the signature line she couldn't help but shutter. She couldn't help where her mind went. There was only one person she would label her 'nemesis' and that would be Hoyt. "Guys?" she asked her voice a little shaky.

"He's dead Jane," Frost stated knowing exactly where his partner's head had gone.

"He's trained apprentices before," Jane said. "Can either one of you think of another person that could be considered a nemesis for me?"

"The JD deaths don't fit Hoyt's pattern. He never used a gun and he targeted woman and not men," Korsak answered. "As weird as this is Jane, this doesn't feel like Hoyt's handiwork to me."

Jane heard what Vince said but she was unwilling to dismiss Hoyt's possible involvement. Never had one man been more responsible for the pain and suffering of another person than Charles Hoyt had been for Jane. "Frost, did you get anything from FedEx?"

"They back traced the delivery. The package was picked up from a box not a store location." He didn't hide his disappointment. If the sender would have gone instead a building there may have been surveillance footage. "The box was located off Boylston St and Dartmouth St. We won't have any store video but I'm checking to see if any of the traffic cameras or surrounding businesses have the box in view. I wouldn't count on that though."

"And method of payment?"

"Doesn't look good. Shipping was paid for in cash six weeks ago. There's no video available for that either."

Jane was about to go from annoyed to aggravated. Someone was trying to make this personal and Jane kept running into dead ends. "So we have no idea who sent this." It wasn't a question. It was a sad statement of present fact.

"Not right now," Frost admitted.

Jane turned to Korsak. "Cavanaugh is going to want to know about this. Do you want to tell him or should I?"

"I've got it. I'll take him a copy of the note. Jane…."

"Right now, I do not have any idea what this is in reference to Vince. I just don't." She knew Cavanaugh would ask both Korsak and eventually her.

Korsak nodded understandably. "The sender thinks he knows you. He also believes you have a secret you need to tell and that you have failed at something for him or the victims before. Maybe this is connected to an old case you worked."

That was a possibility. Jane turned to Frost. "Can you run a list of my cases focusing on anyone recently released from prison? If supplies were purchased six weeks ago generate me a list of anyone released from prison in the last year but exclude those who have been released since the FedEx purchase date."

Frost nodded. "That will take a few minutes but I'll run it." Korsak went to go speak to Cavanaugh and Frost focused his attention on his computer. Jane was left staring at the letter still displayed on the screen.

_Don't you think it's time you told them why?_

R&I

The phone at the desk Jane was using rang. As an instinct she picked it up and answered, "Rizzoli." She was quiet for a moment as the caller was talking. "What?" She paused and listened closer this time. Jane's reaction was enough to make Frost look up. "Ok, send her up," she answered and hung up the phone.

"What was that all about?" Frost asked.

Jane was shaking her head. Her day was getting worse and worse. "You guys won't believe who is headed up to see me right now."

"Who?" Korsak asked.

"Belinda Simmons," answered Jane.

"Why?"

"Apparently she may have some information on our JD cases. Frost, will you turn off the screen. I'm not sharing case information with that woman."

Frost immediately turned off the screen and all three detectives waited for the former media liaison to walk into the BRIC. About five minutes later Belinda Simmons was standing in front of Jane.

"Detective," she started. "I appreciate you seeing me."

Jane didn't want to exchange pleasantries. "Ms. Simmons, I'm rather busy. What can I do for you?"

Belinda had expected a less than cordial greeting from the detective. She was not disappointed. "Detective, I had a package delivered to me today and I think you need to see what was in it."

Jane's interest was now peaked. She wasn't going to allude to Belinda that she had received a delivery as well. "Why would a delivery for you be anything I needed to know about?"

Belinda pulled out the document she was sent and she handed it to Jane. Jane took a second and read through it. She looked up at Belinda and then over to Frost and Korsak. "What the hell is going on?" she couldn't help but ask.

"I was sent this about an hour ago," Belinda attempted to answer.

"Frost I need an evidence bag," Jane said. As he went to get one she returned her attention to Belinda. "Do you have any idea who sent this to you?"

Belinda was quiet for a minute before answering. "I don't know exactly who sent this but I think I know what this is all about."

R&I

Maura got off the elevator and started to walk towards Jane's desk. She looked in the bullpen but didn't immediately see Jane or the guys. She turned and saw Frost and Korsak were in the BRIC. Based on the increased amount of movement she saw coming from the two there may have been some movement in one of the JD cases. She took her report and headed to speak with Jane.

She started talking as she entered the BRIC not really looking around. "Jane, I got the DNA profile from Providence and was able to match it to John Doe #1. Your JD is Brett Jenkins. You can go ahead and…." She didn't finish her sentence as she finally looked up and realized Jane wasn't there.

"Sergeant? How you seen Jane?" Maura asked.

Korsak turned to Maura. "She's in an interview room talking with Belinda Simmons."

"What is she doing talking to Simmons?" Maura asked more than a bit surprised by that notion.

Korsak shook his head. "Something's going on Maura. We don't seem to know what exactly but something is definitely going on."

Maura looked at Frost and Korsak again and noticed the stress on their faces. Something really was going on and it didn't appear as if either detective understood any of it. Maura looked up at the screen and for the first time saw the two notes.

She read through them both and looked at Korsak. "What are these?"

"Notes delivered to both Jane and Belinda today." He didn't bother pointing out which was which as he knew Maura would figure that out. "Jane's doing an interview with Belinda about the delivery and to see what she might know."

Maura scanned the note again and needed to speak with Jane. "Which room?" Korsak hesitated to answer for a second. "Vince, which room?"

"Interview room one."

"Thank you," she said and she made her way to the interview room area. She walked into the observation booth and saw Belinda sitting in the room but Jane wasn't there. She left the booth and saw Jane starting to walk towards the entrance to the room. "Jane," she stated to stop her from going in.

"Maura. I'm about to start an interview can this wait?"

"Jane, I saw the notes when I was in the BRIC. Do you think the sender is also the killer?"

Jane was a little confused why Maura wanted to know but she answered. "Yes. I believe whoever sent those notes is the killer."

Maura nodded. "I don't know if this will help you or not but whoever sent those notes is a woman."


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

"How do you know the sender is a woman?" Jane asked Maura. She stepped away from the door of the interview room pulling Maura along with her.

"Nemesis." Maura said. She looked at the confused look on Jane's face so she continued to explain. "The note sent to you was sighed 'Nemesis'. It's a reference to Greek mythology. Nemesis is the Greek goddess of retribution for evil deeds. The name itself means 'she who distributes or deals out'. She was regarded as an avenger and a punisher."

"A goddess?" Jane asked still a little confused. She didn't doubt Maura. She learned long ago when it came to facts and information never question the lovely doctor. If the use of 'Nemesis' was a signature it was reasonable to believe that the sender was a woman. Jane turned and looked at the interview room door again and then back to Maura. "Anything else about either note jump out at you?"

"Do you know where the two quotes come from?" she asked.

Jane shook her head. "I was going to have Frost run them to see if he can find a match."

"They are from 'The Count of Monte Cristo'," Maura answered saving Frost some legwork.

"Both of them?" and Jane watched as Maura nodded. "A goddess of retribution. References to vengeance and quotes from a story about revenge. I sense a theme."

"I read both notes fairly quickly. I can go look at them again and see if there's anything else I can pick up on," Maura offered.

"Would you please? I need all the help I can get right now."

Maura nodded. "I'll see what I can do." She watched as Jane went to head for the interview room. "Jane? What it is that the sender thinks you need to tell people?" Maura hadn't missed that reference in Jane's note. The sender of Jane's note seemed to be implying she knew why Jane didn't view herself as a hero. It was the same question Maura had just asked Jane Saturday. The one she never really got an answer.

"I think we are about to find out," Jane said as she put her hand on the door knob and disappeared into the interview room.

R&I

Maura returned to the BRIC wanting to examine the notes further. She walked in and both Korsak and Frost looked up.

"What's going on Doc?" Korsak asked. He had a feeling that Maura recognized something from the notes she needed to tell Jane.

"The sender is a woman," Maura stated. "Nemesis is the Greek goddess of retribution."

Frost shook his head and wondered if there wasn't anything that Maura didn't at least know something about. "Greek goddess of retribution? There is reference to retribution in both notes. Vengeance too."

"The quoted text from each note comes from 'The Count of Monte Cristo'," Maura added.

Frost smirked. There really wasn't anything the woman didn't know. "Add revenge to the mix and I'd say we are dealing with one pretty pissed off woman."

"You know what they say about the furry of a scorned woman Frost," Korsak warned.

"True as that may be, I'm not sure this is a woman scorned," Maura cautioned. "I think retribution and vengeance run a bit deeper than scorn. This isn't someone who was rejected. This is someone who is looking to make people pay."

"But for what?" asked Korsak.

"And who?" ask Frost.

Maura shook her head. She didn't know the answer to that. Something told her that Jane did. "Have you guys reviewed the notes?"

"We dissected Jane's note. She doesn't seem to know what truth needs to come out and she didn't say if there was something she needed to explain with that whole 'not seeing herself as a hero' line. She was genuinely confused by it. We were just getting started with the note the Belinda was delivered."

Maura turned her attention to the screen. She proceeded to work through Belinda's note.

'_And now farewell kindness, humanity and gratitude! Farewell to all the feelings that expand the heart! I have been heaven's substitute to rewarding the good- now the god of vengeance yields to me his power to punish the wicked!'_

"The sender is saying she has hardened her heart and turned away from good and is now seeking to punish those that are evil. That have committed a wrong. She views herself as an avenger."

_Innocence destroyed with four to blame. Justice denied with one to blame. A life forgotten and all to blame. Two held accountable with two more to go. Retribution is inevitable._

"Innocence almost always signifies youth. A child. Whatever she is avenging it may have happened to a child or herself when she was a kid. Four to blame. Four people did something again it could be to her or to someone she was close to. Justice denied. Someone interfered with her idea of justice for whatever happened. She thinks someone stopped it or kept justice from being carried out. A life forgotten. She thinks the world has forgotten either her or who she is trying to avenge. That they have forgotten about whatever happened. Two accountable. That could be the two victims. But there will be at least two more if she isn't stopped."

"At least two?" asked Korsak. "The note says four."

"'Four to blame' gets you to four possible victims. But the one she blames for justice being denied could either be one of the four or another person all together. So that could be five potential victims. And then there is no telling what she may be planning for addressing the 'world' she blames. If she is homicidal and blaming the world there could be numerous potential victims." Maura didn't even want to think about that.

_The media can be a powerful sword. It can make the innocent guilty and the guilty innocent. You now must decide which way it points. The choice is yours but the vengeance is mine._

"This part could be for Belinda personally. The power of the press. This could either be the sender giving Belinda the power decide how this story plays out for the media or there could be something Belinda was involved in with that involved innocence and guilt. Part of what the sender is trying to avenge. Either way the sender feels she is getting her vengeance."

Maura took a deep breath and tried to take in both notes to see if there was anything else she could see that might help Jane. After a second read through she was comfortable that she had deciphered all she could from the notes. She turned to Korsak. "Did you hear me when I first came in? JD #1 is positively confirmed to the Brett Jenkins."

"Yeah. Frost is running as much background on him as he can think of. He also was trying to trace Jenkins' movements up until he went missing. I wish we had the ID for JD #2 to see if there is any overlap between him and Jenkins. But at least we have one identification for now."

Maura turned to Frost. She didn't want to try to tell the detective how to do his job but a thought occurred to her. "Frost?"

"Yeah Doc?"

"Just a thought. But these notes seem to suggest the killer has some deep personal motive for retribution and vengeance. Deep enough to kill for. You may want to try to see if you can find out if Jenkins was ever involved with anything that could bring any of this on."

Frost nodded. "I'll see what I can dig up."

Maura looked back over at Korsak. "Do you mind if I listen in on Jane's interview with Simmons?"

"Not at all. In fact it may be a good idea if there was someone listening in."

R&I

The secret to a good interview was to go about it in three phases. Phase one was to first get them to tell you what they wanted to tell you on their own terms. This allows them to relax and feel like they are in control. Phase two was to slowly chip away at the inconsistencies in what they were telling you. Slowly, delicately so as to not arouse suspicion. You aren't questioning their story you are merely seeking clarification and a better understanding of the minor details. Then during phase three of the interview you go in for the kill. You break their story and suddenly they are telling you things they swore would never cross their lips and they don't even realize how you put them in that position. But they are there and there is no longer a way out for them.

Jane carried a copy of Belinda's note as well as a copy of her note into the interview room. Her mind was now racing from the information that Maura had given her that the killer she was looking for was a woman. She had assumed it was a man. With as many years Jane had in on the job she should have learned her lesson about making assumptions by now.

She needed to focus her attention on Belinda and what her connection or involvement in all of this could be. Jane was unsure as to why she was getting packages sent to her and now with Simmons getting a delivery too she wanted to know why. There was a large piece of the puzzle to this mystery that she was just not seeing.

So she took a seat across the table from Belinda and put her best Detective Rizzoli face on. "So why are you here?" Jane knew the key to any good interview or interrogation was to say as little possible but solicit the most information from the subject as possible. She was sure Belinda understood the meaning of the note and may even know exactly what was truly going on. But she needed to be careful not to reveal both how much she didn't know and things that Jane knew but Belinda didn't. Based on their history Jane didn't trust Belinda one bit.

"Detective, I'm pretty sure my life is in danger," there was clear panic and fear in her tone.

"Why do you believe that you are in danger?" Jane was perfectly content with fishing for information at this stage of the interview.

"You've read that note. How am I supposed to feel after getting a note like that?"

"Belinda, no offense but I didn't ask you how you felt I asked why you believe you are in danger. Let's start with a different question. Why were you sent this note?"

"I'm not sure," Belinda started.

"No. Let's get something straight right now. I know you don't like me. I clearly don't like you. But none of that matters right now. What matters is that I don't have time to waste on your lies or your half-truths. I'm trying to investigate a homicide. You know something about all of this and I need to know what. So, let's agree to put aside our differences with each other for the time being. We are going to talk about everything you know about this letter, its meaning, what caused it and who sent it to you. We are going to have a rational, civilized conversation and we are going to get through it without you wasting any more of my time by lying. Understood?"

"Detective, about the other day…."

"Save it. This isn't about that. Neither one of us needs to get caught up in that right now. I need to understand what is going on with this note." She slid a copy of the note over to Belinda. "Before we came in here you said you didn't know who sent this note but you thought you knew what this was all about. It's time to tell me exactly what you mean by that."

Belinda's eyes shifted down to the note sitting in front of her. "Have you ever had a decision you made haunt you throughout your entire life?" The self-recrimination in her tone was unmistakable.

Jane didn't answer. She interpreted the question to be a rhetorical one. She was not going to let the interview turn into one about her. The focus at the moment was on Belinda and not Jane. Jane needed to get information from Belinda about this case and to do that she meant she could not give up control of the room. So instead of answering, she sat in silence waiting for Belinda to fill in the blanks.

Belinda looked down at the note in front of her again but didn't say anything for a minute. Jane was used to sitting in silence during an interview. A frequent mistake was to speak too soon and rescue someone right before they were about to offer up needed information on their own. Over the years Jane had mastered using the silence to her advantage. It usually became uncomfortable enough to break even the hardest criminal.

"Have you been able to identify the victims yet?" Belinda asked finally filling in the silence. Jane noted the change in topic but let it go for the moment.

"What victims are you referring to?" Jane asked not wanting to let Belinda know what they did or didn't know.

"The ones from the note. '_Two held accountable with two more to go.' _Have you been able to identify the two victims yet?"

"I'm not going to comment about an ongoing investigation. I'm still waiting for you to tell me what you think the note that was delivered to you this morning means. Now, it's time to stop stalling and talk to me or I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"I was asking because I think I'm one of the 'two more to go' and I was wondering if you had identified the two victims so I could tell you who the other person besides me is."

"Why don't you tell me the names of the people you think are somehow connected with this and then let me worry about the notifications and identifications."

Belinda took a deep breath. The time had come. She needed to start telling the detective what was going on. The stalling wasn't helping calm her nerves. She just needed to get this all out there. She reached down into her purse and pulled out the photos that had also been sent to her. She was careful not to look at them knowing the reaction they caused. She slid the photos across the table to Jane. Her hand was visibly shaking as she pushed them.

"Besides myself there was Brett Jenkins, Randy Keyes and Jennifer Shelton."

Jane was surprised to see photographs coming at her. She hadn't missed Belinda's reaction to them. She hadn't missed the fact that she was refusing to look at them. She took possession of the photos and slowly turned them over one by one to see for herself what it was that Belinda did not want to see. As she took in the images from the photos she let the names Belinda listed synch into her head.

She knew from the photos. Had she not seen the pictures it may have taken time for her to link the names to the event. But there was no mistaking the photos. Jane had to fight to maintain control of her expression. She refused to let Belinda see that she had any reaction to the photos are the list of names. But there was most definitely a reaction. The images on the photographs told Jane everything she needed to know about what all of this was ultimately about including who it was she was looking for in connection with the two homicides.

In that moment Jane felt herself answer Belinda's earlier question. Yes, there were some decisions she had made in her life that haunted her. And it was clear that she was about to face the consequences of one of the biggest mistakes she had ever made in her career.


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Maura couldn't help but notice the change in Jane's body language as she looked at the photos Belinda had handed her. She wondered what the pictures were as it was clear they were powerful. Belinda wouldn't look at them and Jane looked like she had seen a ghost. She stepped closer to the glass trying to see if she could make out the images.

"Besides myself there was Brett Jenkins, Randy Keyes and Jennifer Shelton."

Maura made a mental note of the names Belinda had stated. She knew the first John Doe was confirmed to be Brett Jenkins. She wondered if she should alert Korsak or Frost to run Randy Keyes to see if he was a match for JD #2 but she couldn't seem to take her eyes off of Jane. Everything about her seemed to have changed in a millisecond. There was an almost pained look on her face. Maura didn't understand what was going on but she felt an overwhelming urge to step in and offer comfort to Jane. The woman she loved in distress and she just wanted to help her. But she didn't know how.

The silence continued in the interview room for a few minutes. Jane looked at all the photos and seemed to be taking a minute to compose herself. She finally spoke. "Has she ever contacted you before this?"

"Is it her?" Belinda asked. It was clear to Maura that Belinda had an idea of who might be responsible for what was happening but wanted Jane to confirm it. Based on the look on Jane's face Maura was sure Jane now understood what was going on. It was as if all the dots finally lined up in a way to reveal the appropriate picture for Jane.

"It's very possible," Jane offered. Her tone was flat and disconnected. She seemed unwilling to confirm anything for Belinda. Maura believe it was due to the mistrust Jane had for Belinda. "Have you been contacted by her before this at all?"

Maura desperately wanted to know who the 'her' was they were both discussing.

"No. I haven't seen or heard from her in six years."

Jane looked at the pictures again and then looked up at Belinda. "I have questions but I need to step out for a few minutes. Can you stay?"

Belinda nodded. "I'm not going anywhere unless you make me leave. I think I'm her next target."

Jane nodded. Maura continued to watch as Jane wrote out something on a piece of paper. She then stood up and collected the photos. "Do you need anything?" Belinda shook her head. "I'll be back as soon as I can but there are some arrangements I need to get moving. Make yourself comfortable. The door isn't locked if you need or want to walk around please feel free. Just do not leave the station without speaking with me first." As she went to towards the door she stopped and turned towards Belinda. "One thing I need to know. What is your involvement in all of this? The short version."

Belinda was quiet for a minute. "The short version? I was their alibi." Maura couldn't help but notice Belinda couldn't look at Jane when she answered that.

"Let me guess. You lied." Jane didn't try to hide her disgust.

Belinda couldn't answer verbally but Jane got her answer. "Why?" Jane asked. Maura realized Jane's look was more disappointment than surprise.

Belinda released a sigh. "Jennifer Shelton is my sister."

"You chose your sister over doing what was right?" Jane said a little heated.

"Who are you to talk? You chose to do nothing. And for what? An arrest and a promotion?" Belinda's disgust equaled Jane's in that moment.

Maura watched Jane's reaction to that but she couldn't read her. It was driving her crazy watching this exchange and not understanding half of it. She felt like the two women were talking in code.

"Do you know where Jennifer is right now?" Jane recovered from the verbal blew Belinda had delivered.

"She lives here in Boston. I tried her this morning but her phone went straight to voicemail. She hasn't returned any texts so far today. She works at a restaurant, Towne, on Boylston St." Belinda was quiet for a moment and then had to ask. "Brett and Randy? Are they the two John Does?"

Jane didn't answer for a moment. "We haven't confirmed anything yet. I'll be back as soon as I can." And Maura watched her walk out of the interview room. She went out the observation room to try to catch up with Jane who was well on her way towards the BRIC.

"Jane…." She called out stopping Jane in her tracks. Jane turned and looked at Maura. Maura couldn't help but see the pained look on Jane's face. Reaching out Maura instinctively cupped her hand on Jane's cheek. "What is it?"

Part of Jane just wanted to hide from all of what was going on. She didn't want to face it. There were secrets people kept deep down. Shames and guilts that could swallow the soul of person if not kept at bay. Jane had those. A few too many of those. Her life was a balancing act of keeping her monsters at bay and trying to live a life others could be proud of. She handled that balancing act differently at different times. Right there. In that moment looking into the eyes of the one person she loved more than anything in the world she feared being completely swallowed by her guilt.

Maura gasped at the flood of emotions that passed across Jane's face. Maura realized Jane was fighting some internal battle within herself and for the first time in a long time Jane looked like she was close to losing that battle. She was on the verge of breaking down and Maura knew it. She also knew that the last thing Jane would want would be to break down in front of the other officers.

Maura fought her first instinct. She had wanted to wrap her arms around Jane and just hold onto her. She wanted to whisper to her that she would be ok and that Maura wouldn't let her go but their physical location seemed to prevent that from happening. Instead, she inched ever so close to Jane and spoke softly. "Tell me what you need," her tone deliberate but warm.

"Korsak and Frost," she managed trying to regain her composure. "I have to give them names."

Maura understood. Jane was trying to hold it together to get information to the guys. She was trying to but the case before her own needs. Maura was going to make sure that happened. She took Jane's hand and squeezed it. "Ok. They are in the BRIC. We will go there together."

Jane squeezed back against Maura's hand. She took a deep breath trying to center herself and they walked to the BRIC together. Hands released at the last possible moment before entering the BRIC.

"Jane. Anything from Belinda?" Korsak asked not really looking up at Jane when she and Maura walked in.

"I need an APB released for a Jennifer Shelton and a Natalie Pennington. Frost, run the name Randy Keyes and pull any information that could be used for purposes of identification." Jane turned to Maura. "He's our JD #2. If Frost can get records can you confirm the ID?"

Maura simply nodded. Some of her directions Maura already knew. She stood back to let Jane take command and retake some control over her emotions. It was an impressive transformation to behold but Maura sensed it was temporary. Once Jane had Korsak and Frost moving in the right direction Maura was afraid the flood gates would open once again. She stayed close to Jane just in case.

"Jane, slow down," Korsak said now looking up at Jane and seeing the look on her face. "Start at the beginning. Clearly Belinda knows something."

Jane took a breath and looked at both Frost and Korsak. "Sorry. But we are running out of time and need to get some things going. I think our suspect is a woman Natalie Pennington current whereabouts unknown. We need to put out an APB for her. She should be considered armed and extremely dangerous. Frost I need you to run everything you can on her history and background. Maybe there is something there that will tell us where she is now. She's 27 years old. She was born and raised in Laconia, New Hampshire but went to school in Boston. She was hospitalized three years ago for a breakdown but I'm not sure how extensive or long term the treatment was.

"Our next potential victim is Jennifer Shelton. She lives in Boston but according to Belinda she is not currently answering her cell phone. Frost you can run her and get an address. Let's get some uniforms over to her place. She works on Boylston Street at the restaurant Towne so send a unit over there too. We need to find her. Also, our second JD is most likely Randy Keyes. Last known residence is Providence, Rhode Island but that was a few years ago. I'm not sure where he lives now. Look at Massachusetts and surrounding states DMV for an ID."

Korsak and Frost immediately nodded and both reached for phones to make calls and arrangements. Jane knew she was going to have to fill in the blanks for the guys at some point but she wanted to try to locate Shelton first. Jane had a bad feeling that Pennington might already have Shelton. If that was the case they needed to find Pennington before they were dealing with a third death.

"Jane?" Maura was still standing by Jane's side. There was something about Jane when she took over and took command of a situation. Powerful. Confident. Commanding. But underneath it all Maura had seen a glimpse of a hurt and wounded woman. Something was eating away at the detective. Something unleashed in that interview wrong while she was talking with Belinda. Jane was coming face to face with some incident in her life and Maura wanted to understand what could have that kind of impact on her. "Talk to me."

Jane looked up at Maura. The look of concern and love that was coming from her almost made Jane lose the remaining grip she had on her emotions. She felt herself coming close to losing that control again and she did not want to do so in front of Frost or Korsak. It was one thing for Maura to see this side of Jane. If was quite another for Korsak or Frost to witness it.

"Not here," she said pleading with Maura to get her out of the BRIC even for just a few minutes.

Maura immediately understood. She tentatively took ahold of Jane's hand and started to pull her towards the hallway. Jane turned to look at Korsak and Frost not wanting to abandon the workload for them both. But they clearly had things under control. And Jane needed to get away from them even if only for a moment. So she followed Maura.

Maura sensed that Jane didn't want to be too far from Korsak or Frost in case they needed to react to the APBs. So she pulled Jane into a nearby conference room and shut the door. In all the years Maura had known Jane she had never seen the look on Jane's face she saw in that moment. As soon as the door was closed she closed the distance between herself and Jane.

"What is it?" she asked in a soft, quiet voice maneuvering herself to mere inches from Jane. She was hoping Jane would reach out to her for a sense of balance and security.

"How much of the interview did you see?" Jane asked.

"I saw almost everything. I saw what those pictures did to you. What they are doing to you now. Jane, talk to me. What is happening?"

"Belinda is not the only person who is hunted by the decisions she made," Jane started. She looked up at Maura. There was nothing but concern and love reflected in her eyes. Jane wasn't used to opening up to people. Even with Maura, her best friend and now lover, it was tremendously difficult for Jane to talk about this particular subject. But she needed Maura and for the first time in her life she was going to reach out and try to hold onto the only thing in her life that made any sense. She just hoped it would be enough.

"My note had our suspect asking me if it was time I explained to people why I don't consider myself a hero. You asked me that very same question on Saturday. Do you still want to know the answer?"

"Jane I want to know what's wrong. You can talk to me about anything. I hope you know that."

"I need you to not hate me after I tell you this. Maura, I love you. Please don't hate me."

"Jane, there is nothing you can tell me that will change how I feel about you. I love you too. Part of loving someone, truly loving them, is trusting that person will still be there even during the bad. You need you to know you can trust me. I don't love you because I think you are perfect. I love you for who you are. Whatever this is, whatever is going on, it's a part of you and I'd like to understand it. Please."

Jane took a deep breath and locked in her eyes on Maura. The time had come.

R&I

_**March 2006 Boston, MA  
Savio Preparatory High School**_

"_Alright guys, five more minutes and pencils down," came the warning. Jane couldn't help but chuckle at the near panicked look half the class had wash over their faces. The five minute warning was never good to hear when they weren't at the end of the test yet. As her eyes scanned the room it didn't surprise her to see hurried attempts at filling in the bubble sheets. Several choosing to finish over choosing to be right. It also didn't surprise her that only one student was finished already._

_Jane let the five minutes lapse finally calling out, "Time!" She was greeted with multiple groans. "Pencils down and pass the sheets to the front of the class please." She turned her back to the class and paused for two seconds before speaking. "Mr. Wilkins that did include you as well. Pencil down." She bit the side of her cheek to keep herself from laughing as several students snickered knowing she was right about Reggie trying to keep working._

_Jane collected the tests and turned her attention to the class. "For Monday, please review chapter seven of your texts and be prepared to discuss your opinion about what Roosevelt was attempting to do with the creation of his New Deal programs." Jane got the sentence and homework assignment out just before the dismissal bell sounded._

_As soon as the bell sounded Jane retreated behind her desk. This history class was their last class of the day and there was always a charging herd of students trying to flee the building like it had caught on fire. She found the safest place to be after the sound of the bell was behind her desk. The classroom emptied out almost immediately._

_Jane took a seat at her desk and looked up to see one student had stayed behind. That too, didn't surprise her. "So, Ms. Pennington, how'd I do?"_

_A small smile broke out across the young girl's face. "I thought the questions were quite fair Ms. Reid. You covered everything on your prep review so if everyone studied the test should have been fairly easy."_

_Jane had been undercover at the school for a month now and she still was not used to hearing the students call her 'Ms. Reid'. That part of undercover work was never something she got used to._

"_You were the only one who didn't seem to need to scramble at the end. Did I ask too many questions?" It was a genuine question._

"_I don't think so. I just think the rest of the class didn't study." She said it so matter-of-factly that Jane had to fight not to laugh. She was surprised how well she had taken to being in the role of a teacher for this assignment. She had even let herself think that if she had to do something other than be a cop she could see herself being a teacher. As it was she was working undercover in the preparatory school trying to identify a drug distribution ring amongst the students and quite possibly the faculty. But still, if she ever._

_Jane had welcomed the change from working Vice. There were only so many times she could get 'hookered' up before it got old. She had requested a transfer to Homicide and there was an opening she was hoping to be in line for. She was a candidate for the job but she was now stuck in bureaucratic limbo. Jane realized that her promotion into Homicide may depend on how well this undercover operation went._

_It finally occurred to Jane that the girl in front of her was lingering. It wasn't unusual for Sara Pennington to stay behind for a minute to speak with Jane but she didn't make it a habit of lingering. "Is there something that you need Ms. Pennington?"_

_Jane recognized the look immediately. Something was off with the girl. There was a flash of something. Jane turned her complete attention to the girl and softened. "Sara?"_

_Within a few minutes the tears were streaming down Sara Pennington's face. Jane hadn't been prepared for that so she was a little slow in responding. She got up and moved to sit next to the girl. "Sara," Jane said and tried to be a soothing as possible. "What is it?"_

_Sara attempted to speak but her sobbing kept the words from coming out. Jane tried to console her enough to get her to stop crying. Eventually she could speak. "Ms. Reid, have you ever heard of 'The Game'?"_

_Jane shook her head. She hadn't heard that phrase spoken at the school since she had been there. "No, what is it?"_

_Sara sighed and thought a minute before she spoke. "The boys of each grade play it. It's basically a point system for their….conquests." Jane couldn't help but notice Sara flush a bit in embarrassment having to discuss sex with Jane. For her part, Jane nodded her understanding of how Sara had used the word conquest._

"_Every act has a point value. Kissing, feeling girls up, all the way up to actual sex. The points are accumulated throughout a school year and at the end of the year each boy with the most points by grade is named the winner. The points are tracked on a website that's available for all the students who knew the site address and password."_

"_Sara, has something happened to you? Has someone tried to force you to have sex?" Jane asked wondering if that was what was bothering Sara so much._

_Sara was quiet for a minute but then shook her head. "No. No one has hurt me," she said but Jane felt there was more to be discussed._

"_Are you sure? You can talk to me if there is an issue. I'll understand." Jane was trying to get the girl to feel more comfortable talking with her._

"_No, no one has hurt me. That's kind of the issue."_

_Jane now looked confused. "I'm sorry? How can the fact that no one has hurt you be an issue? You've lost me."_

"_In order for the boys to get the points posted to their stats, they need to be able to prove what happened. Proof can be the girl willingly admitting to whatever level of contact happened. Clothing items like bras and underwear work too. But mostly the boys use recorded evidence. Either video or voice recordings. All the testimonials are posted on the website too. It's pretty much a living diary of the sexual exploits of the entire school."_

_Jane was following her but still didn't understand what Sara's issue was. "Ok, I follow all of that. Sara, what is the issue?"_

"_The Game was meant to track the activity of the boys in the school. But with the diary and evidence collection it also turns into a tracker for the girls too. As the school year progresses the website sort of turns into a sex rating system. Who was easy. Who was a prude. The whole school has access if they are told the password._

"_At midterms, any girl that has not recorded activity gets highlighted and her point values double. She becomes seen as a bonus conquest as well. Once the girl is highlighted besides the double points for any acts the boy that logs the first sexual activity with the girl earns 500 bonus points for being the first."_

_Jane couldn't believe what she was hearing. These were high school kids tracking sexual encounters on a webpage for the entire school to see. Jane thought for a minute about how the times had changed. In her day the most she had to worry about was whether her make out sessions were being penciled in on the walls in the boys' bathrooms. Rumors and innuendo were all she dealt with. Not websites and video evidence. "And no one has reported any of this?"_

"_I'm not sure. I don't think so. Technically the Game only counts the points of consensual encounters. Any evidence believing to show forced sex or rape is disqualified and the site operator reportedly turns the information over to the school. But no one has ever heard of that actually happening. And there are rumors about several encounters being forced._

"_Ms. Reid, is there anything you can do to look into it? If I got you the website and password could you try to stop it?"_

_Jane wasn't sure what she could do but she wanted the site information and password. There very well could be evidence of assault or rape on that site. "I can try to look into it. Why are you telling me all of this?"_

"_Because I've become a 'Bonus girl' for the sophomore class and to be honest with you I'm a little scared that someone will try and hurt me."_

"_Ok, give me the information and I'll see what I can do."_

_That night Jane reviewed the website. What she found made her sick to her stomach. Jane wasn't a complete prude. She had fooled around in high school but what was happening inside that school was behind fooling around. Videos of underage sex, personal testimonials for encounters all being shared and posted like everyone was proud of what they were doing. What bothered Jane the most was just how many girls seemed to view tracking their conquests as a game. In some cases the girls seemed more competitive than the boys._

_Jane placed a call to her supervisor at the station the next morning. The conversation had not gone as expected. Jane had expected her Lieutenant to be as bothered by the site and tracking as Jane. However, he seemed not to mind. _

"_Jane, did you see any evidence of sexual assault?"_

"_No, but these are just kids. Plus my source told me that they won't post anything that did not appear to be consensual. You know that doesn't mean it doesn't happen."_

"_Jane, I'm sure sexual assaults happen in every high school in the country sad as that may be. But without actual proof there isn't anything we can do. The DA may have a case against the site administrator for child pornography but that wouldn't address the individual kids."_

"_Sir, I'm a cop. How am I supposed to ignore this?"_

"_Jane you are a history teacher at that school as far as everyone is concerned. If you go calling attention to this you may easily put our investigation into the drug distribution in jeopardy. We've been trying to crack this issue for this school for almost a year. You call police attention to this website we are going to lose the ground we gained. We are very close to making the collar."_

"_But Sir," she tried. _

"_No Rizzoli. Without specific evidence of assault there is just nothing we can do. Teenagers have sex all the time. You and I are not supposed to monitor that unless there are reports of assault or rape. Short of that there isn't anything you can do to keep these kids from treating sex like it's a joy ride. But you can help us do something about the drug trafficking. Four students have overdosed this year alone Jane. We are in a position to stop that and save lives. That is where I need your focus."_

"_Can I at least inform the principal about the website?"_

"_Sure. Loop him in and if he wants to take things further that will be up to him."_

_The next day Jane had a meeting with the principal. That was another meeting that didn't go as she had planned either. The principal would not believe Jane. And when she went to type in the website the URL was suddenly unavailable. Without the website to show, Jane didn't have any proof other than her word which was not being accepted by him. Jane had run out of options._

_As much as Jane wanted to pursue the website and sex angle of what was happening at the school she was there to investigate drug trafficking. Her Lieutenant had been right when he said they were very close to finding the source and stopping the flow of drugs going through the school. When Jane hit the wall with trying to push for an investigation into 'The Game' she found it easier to concentrate on the drug investigation instead._

_Three weeks after Sara Pennington informed Jane about 'The Game' and the website the undercover operation caught a major break. Jane was able to serve witness to one of the faculty member conducting a buy. They had found the distributor and had accumulated enough evidence to make eighteen arrests. The arrests all happened over the course of a single day and the entire operation was judged a complete success. Jane's role was deemed quintessential and it all but guaranteed her promotion to the Homicide division._

_The news of the arrests and the fact a faculty member had been arrested for trafficking hit all the news outlets. Jane had been informed of her promotion and the brass wanted to trot her out to the media as a key part of the undercover operation. Her time as an undercover detective was over so she was asked to make the rounds of the local media stations. She was heralded as one of the heroes of the operation._

_A month later Jane was reading the morning newspaper when she saw the article. Buried four pages into the Boston Herald was a story about a Savio Prep student who had made an allegation of sexual assault against two other students. The story did not reveal the names of the accuser or the accused due to the ages of the accused and the policy the paper had of not identifying the name of the accuser in sexual assault cases. But when the story made a reference to a points system Jane immediately thought of Sara and wondered if she was involved. If she was ok._

Maura had listened to everything Jane had been saying and she hadn't interrupted. But Jane had stopped talking and hadn't said anything for a few minutes. Instead she was staring down at her feet. Maura finally reached out and took Jane's hand. "Jane, what happened to Sara?"

Jane looked over at Maura but then dropped her eyes again. She took another minute and was about to continue when there was a knock on the door.

"Jane?" Frost asked sticking his head into the conference room.

Jane cleared her throat and tried to steel her expression. "Yeah Frost."

"BPD units couldn't find Jennifer Shelton at her home or at work and there are signs of a struggle at the home. Also, we found an address for Natalie Pennington. Korsak and I were going to head over there with a couple of units. Do you want to come with us?"

Jane looked from Maura back to Frost back to Maura again. "Yeah, I'm coming." Maura nodded at Jane trying to indicate she understood Jane needed to leave. Jane hesitated for a second but followed Frost out. Maura released the breath she didn't realize she was holding. There was so much more to the story that needed to be told. Maura had no choice but to wait for Jane's return.


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N The posting issue for Chapter 16 was so not my fault. I blame the fanfic site. If you looked for 16 yesterday and didn't find it, sorry. I swear I posted it at its usual time. But it was posted late last night so please go read it if you haven't yet before starting 17. And don't blame me for evil website maintenance issues…. Thanks!**

Chapter 17

Jane, Frost and Korsak headed over to the address Frost found for Natalie Pennington. Along the way Frost gave Jane an update on what they had come across.

"Natalie Pennington did have a breakdown three years ago. She was committed to a mental hospital for three months until the insurance company stopped paying for the treatment. She went back to Laconia to live with her parents. She's had a series of jobs over the last few years but never held onto one for more than three months. She's also in and out of outpatient and group therapies but her attendance with each program was as inconsistent as her ability to hold down a job."

"Is she working now?" Jane asked.

"She was working at a grocery store on Lincoln Street up until about three months ago. Her boss said she just stopped showing up for her shifts which seems to fit the pattern for her."

"What was she seeking treatment for?" Jane asked.

"Mainly depression and drug addiction." Frost answered.

"Jane, what is all of this about?" Korsak asked.

Jane turned her head and stared out the window watching the streets of Boston roll by. "Revenge." She said it loud enough for both Frost and Korsak to hear her. It was the tone that worried both men in the car.

"For what?" Korsak started. "Come on Jane. What's the story?"

Jane didn't turn her stare from the window. "Six years ago Natalie Pennington's sister Sara was sexually assaulted by an unknown number of high school males. She was 16 at the time of the assault. Sara attended a private high school and claimed at the time of her assault that the males of the high school tracked sexual conquests through the school year using a point system.

"She went public after her attack to bring 'The Game', as it was referred to, out in the open but her claims couldn't be substantiated and she was attacked in the press and at the school. She was portrayed as a girl desperately seeking attention, seeking her '15 minutes of fame' and labeled a liar. There were never any arrests or charges filed in her assault.

"Sara Pennington committed suicide a year after her assault to the day. She never fully recovered from the attack and the negative attention that was generated from her claims about what was occurring at that school were the reasons she listed in the note she left behind. A note she left and addressed to her sister. Natalie had battled depression and drug issues all through her life but the death of her sister made things worse. Three years ago she had a breakdown and had to be institutionalized."

"And Natalie's tie to our victims?" Frost asked.

"Sara told Natalie that Jenkins and Keyes were among the kids who assaulted her."

"And Shelton?"

"Sara claimed that Shelton befriended her under a ruse and helped set it up for Keyes and Jenkins to assault her."

"Were her claims ever investigated by the police?" Korsak asked.

Jane was quiet for a few minutes. She had never stopped staring out the window. "Jenkins, Keyes and Shelton were questioned but all three were able to produce an alibi for the time of Sara's assault."

"What does Belinda Simmons have to do with all of this?" Frost asked going for the lesser of the two questions he wanted to be answered.

"She alibied Keyes, Jenkins and Shelton to the police. Belinda is Shelton's sister."

"Did she lie?"

Jane didn't answer but nodded her head.

"So Natalie blames Jenkins, Keyes and Shelton for her sister's suicide."

Again Jane nodded. The car was quiet for a minute. "It would appear that she blames Simmons as well," she offered. "She also blames me."

"Jane, what is your involvement in all of this?" Korsak observed. He looked over at Jane who was still watching out the window.

His question was greeted by silence. He was about to push her again but they rolled up on Natalie Pennington's apartment. He let it go for the moment as their attention was now fully needed on the task at hand.

The three detectives got out of the car and the uniforms that were accompanying them pulled in behind them. Korsak instructed the officers to head around back and Frost, Jane and Korsak slowly made their way towards the front door. They moved deliberately and quietly trying to listen for noise or see signs of sudden movements or danger. But none of the three had their guns drawn.

They got to the top of the stairs and Jane approached the apartment door. All three took up post adjacent and askew from the door. A cop's trick to avoid any bullets shot through the door. Jane took a breath and knocked on the door. All three were quiet trying to listen for movement inside the apartment. There was only silence.

Jane knocked again but added audio this time. "Boston police." The knock and callout continued to yield silence. She tried again. "Natalie Pennington. Boston PD open up."

Nothing.

Jane looked at Korsak and Frost and they had a silent conversation about how to proceed. She knew immediately that they would forcibly enter the apartment if they had to. They had probable cause. Jane tried the door handle and was surprised to find the front door unlocked. She looked back at her partners and all three withdrew their guns to proceed inside the apartment.

They proceeded with caution clearing each room as they went forward. It didn't take them long to figure out that the place was empty. It was a one bedroom apartment and a small one at that.

"Clear. She's not here," stated Jane with a bit of frustration. "Let's look around and see if we can see anything."

They had probable cause to enter the apartment but that was about it. All three detectives understood that their 'looking around' could consist of items out in plain view only. Most cops would use the plain view rule to do a quick check. If anything suspicious or telling was found they would then stop and call in a search warrant request. If they found nothing most cops didn't make the formal search request.

Frost checked the living room, Korsak the kitchen and Jane checked the bedroom. Jane looked around the room. The bed was unmade and there were a few items of clothing on the floor but the room was generally clean and pretty organized. She looked at the items on top of the dresser drawer but it was nothing of importance. She also looked over at the nightstand. There was a book, some kind of romance novel, a half-empty glass of water and a notepad. The top page of the notepad had random doodles on it but there was also one phrase written over and over: _'To where it started'_. It had to be written twenty times on the paper. Jane did not know what it meant.

There was nothing to be found. She rejoined Korsak in the kitchen only to discover that he hadn't found anything. "Anything," he asked Jane.

"Not really. There's a notebook with the phrase 'to where it started' written repeatedly but otherwise nothing.

"Guys, I think I found something."

Jane and Korsak joined him in the living room. He had found Natalie's laptop. He wasn't allowed to turn it on if it was off or search through the history but it was on he could see what was on the current scree. Which was what he was looking at when Jane and Korsak joined him. Jane walked up to Frost and looked over his shoulder at the images on the screen. She didn't notice Korsak looking over Frost's other shoulder.

"It looks like Dr. Isles was right," offered up Frost. He turned to look up at Jane and saw the lost, confused look on her face. "She was reviewing the note sent to Belinda and made a comment that one of the lines about blaming the world could mean Natalie was going to strike out against a group of people. I think this," he indicated to the material they were looking at on the laptop, "might be exactly what Maura was thinking it could mean."

Jane looked at the screen. "If that's the case, we have a bigger problem that I thought. We need to call in for a search warrant." She looked up at Korsak. "And we're going to need to talk to Cavanaugh. Now."

R&I

Cavanaugh looked at the notes sent to both Jane and Belinda. He then looked up at Jane. By the time they had returned to the station to talk to Cavanaugh JD #2 had been positively identified as Randy Keyes. Jennifer Shelton was still missing. A search warrant had been obtained and the CSRU team was headed out to process Natalie Pennington's apartment. Korsak had offered to stay behind to supervise the execution of the warrant while Jane and Frost returned to the station to talk with Cavanaugh and continue the search for Natalie and Jennifer.

"Do you think she is capable of doing something there?" Cavanaugh asked Jane.

Jane shrugged her shoulders. "Sir, I don't really know her. But she is very troubled. She's killed two people already. I think we all assume she either has Shelton or has already killed her. I wouldn't put it past her to have some plan to strike out at the ones she believes hurt her sister and hurt her." Jane paused before proceeding, "I think she told us what her intentions were," she picked up the note and point to a line on the paper. "_The clock is ticking. The end of this all depends on you. Will you fail this time too?"_

"What did she mean by 'will you fail this time too'?"

"Six years ago I had a chance to stop any of this from happening. I failed."

"Savio?" Cavanaugh asked. Jane just nodded her head. She wasn't surprised he knew the details. Cavanaugh was the best Lieutenant Jane had ever worked for and she was sure there wasn't a personnel file for his unit that he didn't know every detail of. "Jane, you were undercover for a drug investigation. A very successful drug operation I might add. And successful because of your work. The drug flow through that school had killed four teenagers before you were able to help stop it. You did your job."

"My job was to protect and serve. Protect and serve everyone not just the cherry picked ones. I had an obligation to stop what was happening at that school and I didn't. And if I couldn't stop it I at least had an obligation to try. I didn't really try Sean. I think we both know that."

"Jane, that was six years ago. You have to let it go."

"Letting it go is how we got to this point in the first place. I already let it go once before. That wasn't the right thing to do. We need to do the right thing now and try and stop her before anyone else gets hurt."

"I agree with you. We need to assume that this is in play," he said. "I need to talk to Captain Hitchens. We can talk again after we start coordinating a response to this." He took the notes he had gathered from Jane and headed out.

R&I

Jane hated waiting. It was a complete waste of her time and she had little patience to just sit around. Korsak was supervising the CSRU team and Frost was at his laptop trying to electronically recreate all of Natalie's movements over the last few months. That left Jane time to wait. Normally in an investigation they didn't know the who or the why. But they knew both of those at the moment. They just didn't know the where.

Jane knew she needed to speak with Belinda again. True to her word Belinda had not left the station. She was afraid for her life and Jane couldn't honestly blame her. The police station was the safest place for her to be at the moment. But Jane needed a break before she subjected herself to another conversation with Belinda. She needed some air. So she headed to her second favorite hiding place in the station.

A few minutes later Jane was up on the roof looking out over the city. She would come up here when she needed a minute alone or to refresh. Most of the detectives used this as a getaway at some point during their week. It was quiet Jane's timing was usually good as she almost never had to share the space. She took in a few deep breaths and tried to slow down her thoughts for the first time all day.

"I never really understood why you liked to come up here but I have to admit it can be rather peaceful," she heard the voice that was inching closer to her. The smile that crossed her face was an unconscious reaction to hearing that sweet voice.

"Peaceful is the whole point. Up here there aren't emails or phone calls demanding attention. There usually aren't people milling about. It's nice to just get a little air from time to time."

She hadn't turned around. She knew she didn't need to. She felt Maura stepping closer and closer to her. She felt her whole body come alive with just the thought that she was moving near. She didn't turn her head when Maura came to a stop standing right next to her. Their shoulders almost touched. She didn't even look down when she felt Maura's hand take hers. She didn't look because she didn't have to. Everything with Maura just felt so right. She gently squeezed Maura's hand and rubbed her thumb across to top of Maura's.

"Nothing on Natalie or Jennifer yet?"

"Maybe a lead. Cavanaugh is talking with the captain and SWAT. We think we know how she wants to punish the world she's mad at. But nothing on Jennifer's location right now."

"Jane, why would you think I would hate you? Earlier you asked me not to hate you. I haven't heard anything from you so far that would even make me consider such a thing. What is it that you haven't told me yet?"

_**May 2006  
Boston, MA**_

_Jane sat at her desk reading the article about the Savio Prep girl's claim of sexual assault. Each word she read felt like a knife being thrust into her gut. She had been told by Sara that all of this was going on and she didn't do anything. Not really. She had let the Lieutenant convince her that the undercover operation was more important. And he didn't have to push too hard. She also didn't push too hard with the school's principal. She could have investigated further. She could have had the PD IT techs work on the website. But she didn't. _

_Instead, she threw herself into the undercover investigation and helped close it. A major sting operation and her ticket to Homicide. It was her dream job and she took it the second it was offered. And then there was the media circus surrounding the drug case. She did the shows. She granted the interviews. But not once did she mention that there may be other issues besides drugs going on in that school. She just did the song and dance and rode her fame and success into chair in which she was currently sitting._

"_Rizzoli!" Jane's head snapped up when she heard her name. "Visitor!"_

_Jane looked up from the paper and saw Sara Pennington standing in front of the bullpen. She put down the paper and went to greet her former student. "Sara?" she asked. _

_Sara didn't move from her spot for a moment but then started to walk towards Jane stopping a few steps short of Jane. One look at her and Jane knew it had been Sara who reported the assault. Jane had to fight the wave a nausea that was rushing through her. _

"_Sara, let's go into a conference room and talk," Jane tried to say as reassuring as possible._

"_No." The tone behind Sara's one word was pained. "I just needed to see this for myself."_

"_See what?"_

"_I needed to see what ignoring me and what I tried to tell you would happen…I just needed to see what you traded helping me for." There was such anger and hurt in her eyes. The look she gave Jane felt like a physical body blow._

"_Sara. I didn't…I tried to," Jane couldn't come up with much to defend herself._

"_Save it. I think we both know what you didn't do. At first I thought you would help me. You seemed like you cared when I tried to explain what was going on. And then nothing happened. Nothing changed. I thought that you tried but that you were just a new teacher so maybe you hadn't found anyone to help you. And then the website came down like two days after I told you. Part of me thought you did do something and that the Game was ending._

"_But it didn't end. They just stopped posting the videos and photos. The word came down that someone was looking through the site who wasn't a student so they pulled everything off the web. But the Game continued. And then came the drug arrests. And again I thought maybe this would end the Game. When it came out that you were a cop and not a teacher I thought finally an investigation into the assaults would happen. But they didn't did they?_

"_I saw you Detective. On the news shows. I read you too. In the papers. Everyone called your efforts in the drug case amazing. They all called out how dedicated and brave you were. That you are an excellent cop and a credit to the city. That you went out of your way to help protect the kids in Boston. You were there. Smiling into the cameras. Answering the questions. Taking the credit. But you didn't protect the kids did you?_

"_They got me two weeks before the school year ended. He needed the 500 bonus points to overtake first place. He won." She let her eyes glance around the bullpen and then she looked straight into Jane's. "You won." She took a step back. "I lost." With that she turned and left the station and left a stunned and broken detective standing in the middle of the bullpen._

"Oh Jane," she said with nothing but compassion. She wasn't sure what else to do or say. She turned and pulled Jane into an embrace. Jane stiffened for a second but then collapsed into Maura's arms and let the tears streak down her cheeks.


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

Maura held on to Jane until her breathing relaxed and became more regular. "Jane," she pulled out of her embrace so she could look into Jane's eyes. "You have to let this go. You weren't the cause of what happened to Sara. The boys that hurt her were the cause. Not you."

"But I…"

"You what? Jane I hate to tell you this but you can't fix everything. You can't stop every bad thing from happening. No one can. You did what you could do at the time. Your focus was on a serious matter. You did your job and saved countless teens when you helped stop that drug ring. You informed your immediate supervisor about the possibility of the Game and you even told the principal. You are not a one-woman army Jane. Despite what you have tried to convince yourself of."

"I could have stopped what happened to Sara," Jane tried.

"You don't know that. You have no idea if that's true. Let's say you started investigating the games that were going on. You don't know if you could have gotten anyone to talk to you. Even if it came out that people were investigating the issue that was no guarantee that it would stop. Teenagers have sex Jane. With or without a points tracking system. You had no evidence at the time that anyone was specifically after Sara. So you don't know if you could have stopped it. Don't do this to yourself."

"My choice has a body count attached to it Maura. That's hard to live with."

"It's a tragedy that those two boys are dead but you didn't pull the trigger Jane. Whatever happens Natalie Pennington is the one who is hurting people not you. And there's still a chance you can find Jennifer Shelton. That's what you should be focusing on Jane. Finding Shelton and keeping Pennington from doing anything more that she will regret later. Two bodies are enough."

"It's three," Jane added quietly.

"What? You haven't found Jennifer yet. It's just the two."

"No Maura, it's three. Sara Pennington committed suicide a year after she was assaulted."

"Oh Jane. I'm sorry. But I'll say it again. All of this is tragic. And sad. But none of it is your fault. None of it. You have to believe that."

"It's hard not to blame myself Maura. I have a hard time not going back to that day when Sara confided in me and not have the desire to change everything I did or didn't do. I just wish I had handled it better. I wish I hadn't failed."

Maura shook her head. She finally was starting to understand Jane a little better. Jane's inability to celebrate or acknowledge the good deeds she had done now made better sense to her. To Jane, none of it seemed to be enough to make up for where she thought she failed. None of it seemed to convince her that she had done enough good to gain absolution for the mistakes she felt were hers.

"Jane. You didn't fail. You have to accept that you can't stop every bad thing from happening. Since I've known you, you have had this amazing ability to react to what has been thrown at you. You size up a situation and you do what you think is best in that moment. That's all anyone should be asked to do. And you do it better than anyone I know.

"Are you perfect? No. No one is. Could you have done things differently? Yes. But that's not just about Savio six years ago. That's about everything. Every day. We all face decisions and choices each day in our lives. And once we make them, and act on them, it's too easy to fall into the trap of second guessing each one of them. If you do that you will drive yourself crazy.

"Jane I know you. I know who you are. And I know that you do your absolute best each and every day to do right by the people you try to protect. You would never deliberately choice yourself over someone else. You could never be that selfish. You aren't capable of that. So as tragic as the events from six years ago and from this week are, you aren't the cause. Because six years ago you did the best you could do. I refuse to think you ignored Sara for a promotion. You reacted within the limits of your situation. You weren't indifferent to Sara Jane. You just aren't capable of that."

Maura tilted Jane's head to force Jane to look into her eyes. "I know you Jane. And I love you. All of you. I could never hate you. Because there's nothing about you to hate. You care about others and think of others before you think about yourself. That wasn't something you started to do after this all happened. You've been that way your whole life. You have always put the needs of others ahead of your own. And I love that about you. And I see that about you. I see you Jane. And you have to start believing that you are a good person and that you deserve to be happy."

Maura moved in and gently placed her lips to Jane's. The kiss was chaste at first. Maura was just trying to convey through touch her feeling for Jane in that moment. She wanted Jane to understand that she didn't hate her and that she wasn't pulling away. Jane immediately reacted to the touch of Maura's lips on hers. It was what she needed. What she needed to let herself really believe that Maura was right there. That she wasn't backing away or blaming her for failing others.

The kiss deepened quickly. Full of need and want. Love and passion. In that moment the two women were connected as one. They both let the emotions they were feeling be expressed through that kiss. Maura's acceptance and love for Jane. Jane's appreciation and need for Maura. Both were standing right there. Neither running from the other. Both in that moment knowing that the other never would.

When the kiss ended Jane rested her forehead onto Maura's. They were both breathless. "I love you," Jane said in a soft voice Maura rarely heard her use.

"I love you too," Maura answered back.

They were quiet for a moment until Jane pulled away. "We should get back downstairs." Maura merely nodded and turned. She took Jane's hand in hers and they made their way towards the exit door together.

R&I

Jane made her way back to the bullpen with Maura following. Frost was sitting at his desk. "What did Cavanaugh say?" he asked. He noticed the look on Jane's face and thought for a moment that it looked as though she had been crying. He knew better than to call that out and since Maura was with Jane he figured that if Jane had broken down Maura had been there to help her.

"He's headed to talk to Hitchens right now. I think they are going to coordinate with SWAT. We both agree it could be a possibility."

"Do you think she has taken Jennifer there?" Korsak asked.

"It's quite possible. There would be some poetic justice to it at least," Jane answered.

"What's our next move?" Frost asked.

Jane didn't have a next move at that moment. She was fairly certain given what was on Natalie's laptop she understood the end game. She didn't think it was a stretch to assume Shelton was wherever Natalie was and it was quite possible they were there. They would wait for SWAT to coordinate a tactical team to respond to the site.

"We wait. SWAT will handle the tac teams. I'm not even sure if Cavanaugh will approve for us to go along. Especially now that Hitchens was involved. This will be a SWAT exercise all the way."

"Waiting sucks." Frost spoke for them all when he said it.

Jane sat down at her desk and looked at the notes sent to both her and Belinda. Almost everything in them now made sense. She had gone from not understanding her message to understanding the underlying message for both. But as she looked at the notes she realized something. Maybe she hadn't understood absolutely everything from the notes. The more she looked at the messages the more she began to believe there was something she was missing.

Both Frost and Maura saw the look on Jane's face change. She was concentrating on the two messages like she was willing an answer to physically jump up from the page. Neither said a word. Over the years they had both learned to not to interrupt Jane when she had that particular look on her face. She would speak when she was ready.

She shifted her chair and piled two reports from a pile that was on her desk. She scanned each file and looked back at the notes. Finally, she looked up at Maura. "Maura?"

"Yes?"

"Are the lab reports back on the dirt particulates that were found on Jenkins and Keyes?"

Maura hadn't check on those yet that morning. She had spent her time that morning on this case but it had been working to positively identify both victims. "I'm not sure. I haven't reviewed them yet. Did you need me to see if they are ready?"

"Would you please?" Jane asked. Maura nodded and headed down to the lab to check for the results.

"What are you thinking partner?" Frost asked.

"The alleys were dump sites. Not murder sites. Natalie shot both guys somewhere and then brought them to alleys in the Back Bay to dump. What if she has Jennifer at the murder site?"

"It's possible. But we have no way of knowing where that murder site could be. I almost think we are better off trying to coordinate with SWAT and see if she ends up at the school tonight."

Frost had stumbled upon Natalie's laptop at the apartment. When he moved his finger over the touchpad to reveal the content of the current page it was the Savio Preparatory High School website. There was the announcement of an Open House and Enrollment party happening that night at the school. Natalie, mad at the world, could quite possibly be planning some sort of attack on that Open House. Cavanaugh and Hitchens were working with SWAT to coordinate their coverage of that event.

"I know but…" she paused to think. _To where it all started_ played through her head. "Natalie may be planning something against the school but it will be impersonal. Detached. She's mad at the school but the first two victims were responsible for Sara's assault. She handled them. It was personal. She shot them in the chest and missed the heart. I think she missed the heart on purpose. She let them both bleed out. She wanted to inflict pain and suffering not go for a quick kill. Jennifer will be the same."

"Ok, I follow you," Frost said nodding his head as she spoke.

"Frost, I don't think she is planning to hold onto Jennifer until that Open House tonight. I think she has Jennifer at her murder site."

"And the Open House?"

"I think there is still a danger. I think she is planning on trying something. But I don't think she will do that with Jennifer in tow. I think she will try to do it after she has dealt with Jennifer."

Maura returned with a folder in her hand. "The labs are back Jane. I can tell you that the dirt particles from each victim are a match for each other."

"That would put them both in the same place at some point before they died. Quite possibly our murder site," Jane stated.

"I can't definitively say that but I can say that at some point they both came in contact with very similar soil."

"Maura is there any way at all to determine a location, even a general location, of where that soil may come from?"

"Even a general location would be conjecture Jane. Boston soil has a very similar composite. There are not too many variations to use soil as a location identifier not to mention our sample size is relatively small."

"But it is at least consistent with Boston then?"

"Yes, that much I can tell you. Otherwise I'm not sure how to isolate it down to a more specific terrain."

Jane tried to think again. She knew she was onto something but just needed to find the missing pieces. _To where it all started._ And then…

"I'm going to go speak with Belinda. Text me if when Cavanaugh is ready to discuss the Open House plans and SWAT tac teams." She said as she walked away without waiting for a response.

_To where it all started_

"Any news on Jennifer?" Belinda asked as Jane took a seat cross from her.

She took her head. "No. We searched Natalie's apartment but there was no trace of her. We have an active APB out for her and for Natalie. Also, we may have discovered a clue about what her ultimate end game will be. That's getting checked out right now."

"Do you think Jennifer is still alive?"

"Until we have a body I won't believe otherwise. Natalie went to a lot of trouble to do the things she has done so far. The fact that we haven't found Jennifer yet is a good sign." Jane cleared her throat and looked up at Belinda. "How much about what happened to Sara did Jennifer tell you?"

Belinda was quiet for a minute. "Why?"

"Because I need some of the details. I think you know them. I need you to tell me what they did to Sara."

"I don't know much," she started.

"Damn it Belinda! If you care about the safety of your sister at all, you will stop withholding information from me! She has her. She has her right now. There's no telling what she doing to her in this moment. Moments being wasted because you keep trying to cover up for what you did or didn't do. She made the boys suffer Belinda. It wasn't quick and painless. It was slow. And quite painful. Now, will you tell me what I need to know or are we just going to waste what little time she may have left because you are still trying to deny your culpability in all of this."

Belinda stared at Jane. She didn't immediately start talking and Jane went to stand up having run out of patience.

"Wait." Belinda said with a tone of desperation. "What do you need to know?"

"When did Jennifer first tell you something happened?"

"The day after Sara reported her assault to the police. Jennifer came over to my place and she was upset. She begged me to help her. I asked what was going on and she told me what happened. She said that Brett was close to winning the Game. He was in second place. There was only two more weeks of school remaining and the only way for him to win was to get a Bonus girl."

"So you knew about the Game all along?"

"I went to that school too Jane. The Game has existed in one form or another for as long as anyone can remember."

"So Brett targeted Sara."

"She was one of the last remaining Bonus girls. So yes, he targeted her. He tried to ask her out and she turned him down. He tried getting Randy to ask her out and she turned him down too. Finally Brett asked Jennifer for help. Jennifer was dating Randy at the time and Brett and Randy were best friends. Brett asked Jennifer to get Sara somewhere he could make his move on her. Jennifer agreed."

"Did Jennifer tell you what she did to make it happen?"

"She just said she faked a fight with Randy because of Sara. She played it off that she was breaking up with Randy because he tried to hit on Sara and she knew Sara didn't want anything to do with it. She said Sara felt guilty about being involved in her break up but was glad when Jennifer sided with her and not Randy. They talked and made arrangements to see a movie together that weekend."

"Then what happened?"

"Jennifer picked Sara up for a movie but took her somewhere else. Brett and Randy were waiting," Belinda paused for a second trying to compose herself. The retelling of this was clearly having an impact on her. "Jennifer told me after towards she drove Sara home and threatened to hurt her even more if she reported it. She also said Brett made Sara record her consent so he would get the bonus points."

"Where did Jennifer take Sara instead of the movie theater?"

"She said she took her into the park. Boston Public Gardens."

"Where in that park?"

"She said somewhere near the lake."

They both looked at each other for a minute not saying anything further.

Belinda finally broke the silence. "Why did she involve you? I mean I get everyone else, myself included, but why you?"

"Her note to you answered that question," Jane offered flatly.

"How?"

"She wrote who she blamed. It's there if you read it right."

"I've been trying to piece it together. The four to blame for lost innocence would be Brett, Randy, Jennifer and me. The one to blame for denied justice would also be me. So where do you fit in all of that?"

"You are wrong about part of your interpretation of the note. I believe you are the one she blames for denying justice since you did provide the alibi for the three at the time. But you are not grouped into the four to blame. I am. The list of the four should be me, Brett, Randy and Jennifer."

Both Jane and Belinda looked at each other and then let the silence fill the room. Each carrying shame for the choices they made so many years ago. Jane was about to say something when there was a knock on the door.

"Jane?" It was Frost. Jane stood up and walked into the hallway with Frost. "Cavanaugh is looking for you. He wants us with the tactical teams."

Jane turned and looked at the doorway of the interview room for a moment. She walked back towards the door and spoke to Belinda. "You realize that your part in this isn't over yet right? You do understand that she was never going to hurt you. That you serve a different function."

Belinda looked at Jane with an utterly confused look on her face. "Different function?"

"'_The media can be a powerful sword. It can make the innocent guilty and the guilty innocent. You now must decide which way it points. The choice is yours but the vengeance is mine.' _ It will be up to you to tell this story. But you must again make a choice. Whose truth will you tell?"

She turned her attention back to Frost and answered. "Let's go." She walked away from Belinda Simmons for the last time. They had nothing left to discuss.


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Jane made her way back to the bullpen to find that Korsak had returned from supervising the CSRU team at Natalie's apartment. Vince and Cavanaugh were standing talking when Jane and Frost joined them.

"Find anything at the apartment?" Jane asked.

"Not very much but we did find bullets and a magazine for an AR-15 but we didn't find the rifle."

"Jesus!" Frost muttered. A semi-automatic rifle in the hands of a mentally unstable killer on a quest for vengeance. That was never a good combination.

"SWAT is coordinating the protection detail for the school. We are trying to get the school to cancel the Open House but that won't guarantee that people won't still show up for the event with the cancellation being on such short notice."

"Sir, I don't think Natalie is going to bring Jennifer to the school. I think she has her at the murder site. I'd like your permission to go look for her."

"Do you know where the murder site is?" he asked.

"I'm not 100% certain but I have an idea. I found a notebook in Natalie's bedroom with the phrase 'to where it all started' written over and over. I think the start Natalie is referring to is where Sara was assaulted. That was near the lake at the Public Gardens. I'd like to check the area out just in case."

Cavanaugh thought for a minute. "We've got the school covered. Go check out the park. If you need backup don't hesitate to call it in. I'll have extra units in the area standing by."

Jane nodded and the three detectives headed for the door.

"Jane, the Public Gardens is a big park," Korsak pointed out.

"I know but the best Belinda could tell me was near the lake at the Gardens. We are going to have to make that work."

R&I

They didn't drive lights and sirens as they were not trying to alert Natalie to their presence. They arrived at the Public Gardens and headed towards the lake. Jane looked around and was thankful that the park wasn't extremely busy. She didn't want to put innocent people in harm's way if she didn't have to.

They got to the lake and looked around. "Okay, let's split up. We need to do a complete lap around the lake," Jane said. Korsak nodded and went in one direction while Frost and Jane headed in the other. All three walked the outer perimeter for the lake paying specific attention to the tree line and wooded areas.

"Do you think she is here," Frost asked.

"Maybe. It is definitely worth a look." Jane said as she continued to walk and scan the woods and the crowd.

About fifteen minutes into their investigation of the lake area Jane saw something out of the corner of her eye. Movement in the wooded area off the path they were on. She stopped and Frost was so in tune to Jane's movement he stopped immediately without having to have Jane say anything. She looked first at him and then over to where she saw the movement. They both strained their eyes to look again. Within a minute they both saw the shadowed movements.

They nodded to each other and slowly started to inch toward the shadows. Once they got off the paved path they were careful with their steps not wanting to alert the shadows that they were closing in. Both Frost and Jane had their hand on their guns but neither had pulled it out of the holster. Not yet. Not until they could confirm what it was that was moving in the trees. Jane didn't want to mistakenly hurt a child or someone who wasn't Natalie.

As they inched closer they started to hear muffled cries and pieces of a conversation.

"Pleeeeese….." was heard along with a sob. Jane could tell there was something obstructing the mouth of person crying. She wanted to believe it was coming from Jennifer Shelton.

"Is that what my sister said? She did plead for her release?"

They had definitely found Natalie and Jennifer. Jane looked at Frost and again they communicated without word. Jane wanted Frost to go back to get Korsak and request backup. He understood what she wanted and he backed away. They didn't want to alert Natalie even by just trying to contact Korsak. Frost would have to get closer to the lake to make the calls he needed to make.

Jane pulled her gun keeping it out and aimed in front of her. She slowly started to move closer to the two women. She finally got a better visual and Jennifer was sitting on the ground leaned up against the base of a tree. She was undetectable from any of the paths along the lake. She legs were straight out in front of her with her ankles tied together. Her arms were tied behind her back and she had a gag in her mouth. She was crying. Jane could see that she had been roughed up a bit as there were welts and bruises on her face but she wasn't close enough to tell if there any more serious injuries.

Natalie was pacing. Feverishly pacing. Back and forth and occasionally waving her hands. Talking. Sometimes out loud to Jennifer and sometimes just mumbles to herself. She had a gun in her hand. From Jane's assessment it was the .22. She looked around but couldn't see any signs of other weapons. No AR-15 in sight.

"How could you? You were supposed to be her friend." Jane watched as she altered her pacing and moved towards Jennifer. Jennifer flinched in anticipation of something and then Jane saw what Jennifer must have realized was coming. Natalie walked close enough to kick Jennifer in the leg before walking off. She started pacing back and forth again.

Jane was delaying announcing herself for as long as she could. She wanted to give Frost time to get Korsak, notify the units Cavanaugh had made available and then quietly work their way towards Jane. If Natalie stayed with this pattern Jane could wait until Frost had returned before moving forward.

"The boys both cried. They begged and cried for their lives. It was sad." Natalie said aloud to no one in particular. Back and forth. Back and forth. At one point she stopped and stared at Jennifer.

"Sara. Sara was the good one. She would have done so much with herself. Why? Why did you have to help them?" she asked and this time as she stepped forward she started to raise the gun to point it at Jennifer.

Jane could wait a second longer. She moved forward gun trained on Jennifer. "Don't even think about Natalie! Put the gun down!"

Natalie's head spun up and she looked at Jane. She stopped pacing but she didn't lower her gun. It was trained on Jennifer.

"Detective Rizzoli. You came."

"I'm here Natalie. Put the gun down."

"I figured you'd be camped out at Savio waiting for me to make an appearance."

"No, I decided it was better for me to come here and stop you from doing anything more and getting yourself in deeper."

"I'm impressed. You really are a good detective. That must have gotten better after you screwed over Sara."

"Natalie. Put the gun down. It's over. This doesn't fix anything. None of this will bring Sara back." Jane was trying to just get Natalie to lower her weapon.

"You're right. Sara isn't coming back. And why is that Detective?"

"Because too many people failed her Natalie. Myself included. But this. All of this. This isn't the answer. She wouldn't have wanted this for you. Put the gun down."

"So you admit you failed her?" she seemed surprised by that answer. She turned to Jennifer. "See! The detective over there admits she screwed up. And I didn't even have to hit her for her to say that. Why couldn't you have been that easy?"

"Natalie. This isn't going to end well for you if you don't put the gun down. Put it down and then you and I can talk."

"We are talking right now."

"Put it down Natalie. I'm your ticket out of this mess."

"My ticket? You think I want out of this? I don't want out of this. I want to finish what I started and then leave this all behind."

"Natalie, it doesn't have to be like that. You need help. I can get you that help."

"Help? Like the last time you got me help?" She debated turning the gun she had trained on Jennifer towards Jane but decided not to do so. "I was institutionalized the last time you offered to help me. Is that the kind of help you are offering me again?"

"It's the type of help that you need." She wasn't going to sugar coat the truth. "Natalie, look around. There's nowhere to go. We have the place surrounded. Let's end this before I end up needing to deal with three murders. Right now it's just two. Please. Put the gun down before you force my play here."

"Did you know my mother forgave you?"

"What?"

"She did. Can you believe it? She came to see me at the hospital when I was finally allowed to have visitors and she told me she didn't blame you anymore. That in the end it wasn't your fault. It was Jenkins and Keyes. Not you. My mother actually forgave you. Of all the things."

Jane had to block out what was being said. She wanted to react to that information but she needed to stay focused on Natalie for Jennifer's sake. Jane understood she was all that stood between Jennifer and Natalie. So she stayed focused.

Natalie started to pace again. Back and forth. Her arm extended holding the gun as it stayed pointed at Jennifer but her eyes never left Jane's. Jane suddenly sensed movement behind her. She knew Frost and Korsak had joined and would have guns trained on Natalie. That immediately made Jane more comfortable. Her backup had arrived.

Natalie realized it too. "I see you brought your friends."

Jane never turned to look. She didn't need to. She knew they were both there and that was all she needed to know. She trusted those two implicitly. Knowing two other guns were trained on Natalie Jane relaxed hers. "Natalie, there's not a way out of this with that gun still in your hand. I'm putting mine away. After that, I want you to put yours down." She released the grip she had on her Gloc and finally bent her elbows pulling the gun down with it. Within seconds the gun was re-holstered.

Natalie took this move in. "That didn't work out so well for either one of us last time Jane. I'm surprised you did that again."

"I was alone last time. I'm not alone this time Natalie. This isn't going to end like last time. So please, please put your gun down. You need help. Let me help you end this." As Jane talked she started moving closer and closer to Jennifer. She had a pretty good idea what Natalie would do in desperation. She had seen it once before. She was determined not to let Jennifer get hurt in all of this.

"Stop moving towards her Jane."

"Put the gun down Natalie. We are running out of how many more times I'm going to tell you that. My partners know when my patience runs out. When I hit that moment and you still have that gun in your hand, I promise you they will shoot. I'm not letting you hurt anyone else. It's time Natalie."

Natalie for the first time turned her head and looked at Frost and Korsak. Only it wasn't just Frost and Korsak. There were now at least seven uniformed officers and a few more suits surrounding her with guns drawn. When they got there and the exact number present she didn't have time to figure out. She looked over at Jane and wondered if Jane even knew how many people were standing behind her ready to protect her.

"Sara didn't deserve what happened."

"I know that Natalie. If I could change any of it I would. Believe me I would. I should have fought harder for her. I didn't and that has haunted me every day for six years. But there isn't a thing I can do to change the past. I've tried. I've tried everything I can think of to make up for it. Natalie I'm sorry. Don't let it end this way. Please, please put the gun down."

Jane watched as everything she said went through Natalie. She turned again to see all of the officers surrounding her. She looked at Jane who had moved still closer to Jennifer and she looked at Jennifer. Jennifer still had tears streaming down her cheeks but had stopped trying to talk or make noise.

"You are right about something Jane. It will end here."

That was as much of a warning as she gave anyone. The shot rang out within a second of her finishing her sentence. Everyone there when asked later couldn't tell how it was that Jane reacted as quickly as she did. But she had. She managed to put herself in between Natalie and Jennifer just at the right moment. Or the right moment for Jennifer anyway.

Frost, Korsak and Cavanaugh all took the shot. All hit Natalie. They had no choice. The first shot was the only shot Natalie had a chance of getting off. It had been intended for Jennifer. She had wanted to finish her retribution. Jane interrupted that plan. But she paid a price for that interference. The bullet intended for Jennifer entered Jane's side less than three seconds after it was fired from Natalie's gun.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

_**August 2009  
Laconia, New Hampshire**_

"_Ma! We need to get going if you want to get the fair on time!" Jane shouted up from the bottom of the staircase._

"_I'm coming. You don't need to holler," Angela shouted back down._

_Jane couldn't help but snicker. She had learned to holler up from the bottom of the stairs from her mother who had been doing it her whole life. The irony of life sometimes. Angela finally made her way down the stairs looking exactly the same as she did when she went up the stairs over an hour before._

"_Let's go. The parking is going to be an issue by now."_

_They headed out and headed towards the fair. Angela was excited to be there this year with Jane. They had missed the fair the year before because of the Hoyt incident. Angela had been grateful for anything that got Jane closer to returning to 'normal'. Her rehab had been tough and the emotional trauma of the incident was beyond anything she could imagine. The fact that they were up here for the final weekend of the fair just gave Angela hope that Jane was slowly readjusting back to her old self again._

"_We will find a spot Jane. Don't worry." Angela smiled over at her daughter. "I wish Maura had been able to join us this weekend. I think she would have liked this."_

"_I know Ma. But she had that conference in New York. I'll bring her next year. I couldn't believe it when she told me she had never been a fair or a carnival before. That's kind of sad."_

"_I know. I don't want to seem like I'm judging anyone, but I wonder about her parents. From the things I've heard her say here and there I wonder if she had a happy childhood."_

"_I wonder that too Ma. I think Maura was taken care of but I think there were things she missed out on. But, she's stumbled into the clutches of the Rizzolis now so I'm sure between Frankie, Tommy, you, Pop and I we can make sure she makes up for lost time."_

_Angela smiled at that. Jane had friends all throughout her life but there was something different about the friendship she had developed with Maura. Angela hadn't seen her daughter so open and relaxed around another person. Maura had been a Godsend for the family after the Hoyt incident. She was the only person Jane let help her with anything. Angela just adored the medical examiner. Jane was right. They had virtually adopted the woman into their family. It had appeared that Maura was thrilled to be included in the craziness that was the Rizzoli clan._

_Jane found a parking spot and they both headed over to the fair. Jane hated shopping on almost every occasion but she never seemed to mind weaving in and out of the craft tents set up at the fair. Somehow this seemed to be exempt from the 'No Shopping' clause Jane enacted when spending time with Angela. They worked their way through the tents as Angela browsed through all the items. _

_Jane was content and as relaxed as Angela had seen her in quite some time. The crowd was a little overwhelming at times and Angela would see small flashes of panic cross Jane's face when too many people ended up in one tent but Angela was mindful of that was would pull Jane out before it became too much. Jane kept her hands in her pockets. A now seemingly permanent mannerism since Hoyt. She didn't want people seeing her scars. Angela couldn't blame for her than but it broke her heart that Jane was so self-conscious about them. _

_The only time Jane's hands were out of her pockets would be when she would place her hand on the gun she had on her hip. That was the other seemingly new habit Jane had acquired. She never went anywhere without her gun. Before Hoyt's attack she wouldn't carry her gun when she was off duty. Now, she carried it, and displayed it, everywhere she went. Angela couldn't even get her to consider the ankle holstered one she knew Jane owned. But then again, she didn't push too hard. If her gun on her hip made her feel safe after everything she had been through, so be it. For now._

_They made it through the entire fair and Angela had found a few things to purchase. They were working their way back to the car to drop off the items. "Ma, do you want to stop by the marina and see if John and Connie want to have lunch? I'm starving."_

"_I'd love that. I told Connie to be on the lookout for us sometime today." _

"_Let's go." Jane put Angela's purchases into the car and they both walked down to the marina towards the Harbor Master's office. Arriving, Jane knocked on the door._

"_We're not interested! Go back to the fair!" came the growl from inside._

"_Wow, what would your mother say about those manners?" Jane yelled back with a smile on her face. John was gruff and cranky but a teddy bear underneath it all if he let a person know him. Jane had known him her whole life._

"_That voice can't be anyone other than Janie!" came the reply as the door flew open and Jane was in a bear hug before she could react. Angela held her breath not knowing what reaction Jane would have to sudden personal contact. She saw a distressed look cross Jane's face and could tell her whole body stiffened but she didn't struggle._

_John felt Jane tense and immediately put her down. He chastised himself for forgetting to be very careful with her. He had read and heard about what had happened and he should have known better. He tried to cover his mistake. "Man Janie! It's great to see you!" He turned to Angela, "And you! You are looking gorgeous Angela!" Angela was in the same bear hug Jane had just gotten out of but her reaction was better than Jane's._

"_John, how are you? Is Connie here? We are here to talk you both into having lunch with us," Angela said as John was putting her down._

"_I'm here," came a voice from inside the door. Connie stepped out and went right for Jane. She didn't bear hug her but she about squeezed the life out of her. "Janie! Oh my. You look good. I'm so happy to see you!"_

"_I've missed you both. Will you join us for lunch?" Jane stepped back as Connie hugged and kissed Angela._

"_Of course. We've been waiting for you. Just let me lock up." Connie locked up the office and the four of them started to head back towards the fair. Jane had offered to drive to the restaurant. The four slipped into a very comfortable four way conversation as they headed to the car. _

_Jane never saw her. None of the four did. One minute the group of four was walking towards the car the next minute a female had come out from nowhere swinging a bat. She had intended to hit Jane but John had somehow moved at just the right moment for the blow to land on the back of his head instead sending him crashing to ground._

_Jane's instincts kicked in and her gun was immediately drawn and aimed out the female who had swung the bat. Only there wasn't a bat in her hands anymore. There was now a gun. Jane took aim at the same time shifting her position to place herself in between the female and her mother. Connie was trying to tend to John._

"_Drop it!" Jane commanded in her full on police voice._

"_It's all your fault you know. All of it!" the female cried. The grip she had on the gun was solid and Jane had a feeling she would shoot if her felt threatened._

"_Put the gun down. I don't know what you think is going on here but that gun in your hand is not what needs to going on right now." She had no idea who the girl was. She was clearly upset about something but Jane didn't know and at this point she just wanted to protect her mother and her friends._

"_You don't even know who I am do you?" Jane didn't answer for a second. "DO YOU!" she screamed._

"_I'm sorry. No. Tell me. Put the gun down and we can talk about whatever is upsetting you."_

"_You take my sister from me and you can't even remember me. Our family meant so little to you. Sara meant so little to you…"_

_Sara. And then Jane knew._

"_Natalie." As soon as she said her name Natalie's eyes widen a bit. But the gun stayed pointed at Jane. "Natalie, I do remember you. And Sara. I just didn't recognize you. I'm sorry. Natalie, please. Put the gun down."_

"_She went to you. She tried to tell you MS REID," Natalie yelled at Jane. "We had always been told by our mother that we could trust teachers. Teachers and cops." A sarcastic laugh came from her. "A lot of good either did for Sara!"_

_Jane tried to defuse the situation. She couldn't see the crowd starting to gather but she could feel it behind her. She was sure someone had called the police by now. She wanted to contain the situation and she needed get the gun from Natalie's hands. _

_She eased up on her gun slowly pulling it back and trying to keep her hands in plain sight. "Natalie. You need to listen to me. I'm going to put my gun away. I need you to drop yours. We can talk but we can't with guns pointed at each other. I want to help you. Please." She holstered her gun and took a tentative step towards Natalie still keeping herself in between Natalie and her mother._

_Natalie seemed to be surprised by Jane's holstering her gun. "Help me? You want to help me now? When all you needed to do was help Sara? Where was this help for her?"_

_Jane kept her hands up and slowly inched her way closer and closer to Natalie. "Let's worry about you right now. I want to help you. Put the gun down. Sara wouldn't want this. Put it down."_

_Natalie didn't seem to register Jane was getting closer and closer but she did see the scars on Jane's hands. She stared at them. "Someone beat me to you." She said and Jane heard the disappointment in her voice. She saw Natalie staring at her hands and realized it was the distraction her needed. Natalie continued to stare at Jane's hands and didn't see Jane suddenly pounce and grab at the gun._

_It fired once but thankfully didn't hit anyone. Jane barely registered Angela's scream from behind her. Just enough to know it was panic and not pain. Jane wrestled with Natalie and was able to get the gun from her but Natalie got in a good shot on Jane's jaw semi stunning her. Jane felt Natalie pull away and try to go for the gun that was on the ground. Pure instinct took over and Jane tackled Natalie. They wrestled and fought for a few seconds until Jane was finally able to subdue Natalie. She heard the police coming in behind her. She held onto Natalie until the officers were able to get her handcuffed._

"_Jane! Jane are you ok?" yelled Angela._

"_Ma, I'm fine. Calm down," Jane tried. She then turned her attention to the police. "Dave?" she asked one of the plain clothed detectives responding to the scene._

"_Jane. Are you ok?"_

"_Yeah. She got a shot to my jaw but otherwise I'm ok. How's John?" she turned to see paramedics starting to attend to her fallen friend._

"_He was out for a few but is coming around. Jane, what the hell is going on?"_

_Jane turned back to Natalie who was cuffed but was fighting the restraints and screaming. "It was her! It was all her fault! She just let them hurt her! She didn't care! She's here acting like nothing happened!" Jane heard Natalie's voice screaming through the massive crowd that had gathered. She could even hear her screaming from inside the cruiser. Each accusation cut like a knife in Jane's gut._

"_That's Natalie Pennington. She attempted to attack us with a bat at first," Jane pointed to the bat that was on the pier. "She hit John on the back of the head. She then pulled that gun," she pointed to the gun that was also still on the ground. "I pulled mine but then tried to talk her into putting hers down. That didn't go so well. But she got distracted and I was able to get the gun away from her. Then you guys showed up and you know the rest."_

"_What is her issue?"_

_Jane was quiet for a minute. "She's upset over her sister's death. She blames me for it."_

"_Pennington? You mean Sara? That was a suicide if I remember correctly." Jane simply nodded. "Why would Sara's suicide be your fault?"_

_Jane didn't offer an explanation. She wasn't about to get into it. "Natalie needs help Dave. I'll come down to the station and fill out a report as soon as I know John is ok and I can get my mother back to the house."_

_The detective nodded. "That's fine. We'll process Natalie but with her state of agitation we may take her straight to the hospital."_

"_She needs a psych hold more than she needs a jail cell," Jane looked at Natalie in the back of the cruiser still crying and screaming. "I'll come to the station in a while."_

_She walked back to Angela and Connie. John by now was on a gurney getting loaded into an ambulance. "John, are you ok?" she asked._

"_It takes more than that to keep me down Janie. I'm good. Are you?"_

_Jane nodded. "Let them at least check you out at the hospital. Connie can ride along with you." Jane walked with them as they loaded him into the ambulance. "I'll come by and check on you later."_

_She turned to Angela. "Ma, let's get you back to the house."_

"_Janie, are you ok?" she asked looking at the bruise forming on Jane's jaw. _

"_I'm fine Ma," she said in her best I'm-not-going-to-talk-about-it voice. She took a breath and slowly started to walk she mother back up to the car. Slowly moving and pushing her way through the crowd. The crowd that was staring at her. And to Jane, it was a crowd staring and judging her. As she was judging herself._

R&I

It is an odd sensation to have everything go from being completely void and black to being aware of your surroundings. To being aware of yourself. In an instant everything is just suddenly there when it had been gone just moments before. But Jane was instantaneously aware of everything that was happening around her.

Her eyes weren't open yet but the rest of her senses were doing a good job of creating a picture for her. She heard fragments of conversations. Voices more than words. Frost. Korsak. Frankie. Tommy. Her mother. She didn't focus on the words. Those didn't matter. The sounds of voices she was so familiar with made her feel better than trying to decipher words. The tones for the voices were good. None sounded too worried. Too on edge. Jane immediately knew she was ok. The voice tones reassured her of that.

She inhaled the unmistakable odor of a sterilized hospital room. An odor she knew all too well it would seem. An odor she hated. But then, slowly she became aware of another aroma. Softer. Pleasant and if Jane would allow for it intoxicating. It was the very essence of Maura. A delicate balance of her perfume, shampoo, body lotion and her own unique flavor that just felt like absolute home to Jane. Maura was there. Close. That fact alone was all Jane needed to be aware of to be happy.

But her touch sensation had returned as well. She realized she was lying down but with her head propped up under probably one too many pillows. But what she cared about in the moment was the feel of a hand woven into hers. Fingers intertwined. Grip tight but not painful. The connection solid. Maura's hand. Maura's hand in hers.

Just when she thought the sudden realizations were to their absolute perfection she got a bonus. The sound of the only voice she wanted to hear every single day of her life. The one she hadn't heard yet. The one now ringing in her ears like it was a private song being played just for her.

"Will you guys please keep it down? Some of us don't care about the Red Sox pitching rotation. If you wake her up I swear I'm going to kick all of you out of this room."

Jane couldn't help but smile, or at least she felt like she was smiling, at Maura. So protective. It was quite adorable.

"Maur, the Sox rotation is a completely acceptable topic for the guys to be discussing," Jane said still without opening her eyes.

"See! Out! All of you out!"

So commanding. When did she learn that tone? That was definitely a Don't-Mess-With-Me tone. And it so totally worked too. Jane heard the guys all escaping from the room before Maura could yell at them.

"Jane?" There would never be a sound that could warm Jane's heart more than hearing Maura utter her name. "Jane, go back to sleep. I'm sorry the guys woke you."

Jane felt Maura lips press onto her forehead. So soft. So loving. It melted her already melted heart. She couldn't keep her eyes closed any longer.

She opened them slowly trying to allow for the light in the room. She opened them to the most beautiful sight in the world. Maura. Jane would never find the right words to describe her beauty. A beauty that could literally take her breath away.

"Hey," Jane whispered.

"Hey yourself," she answered and smiled back. "I'm sorry. I told them they could only be in here if they were quiet. Clearly that wasn't a good idea."

"It's okay. You're here. That's all I need." Jane squeezed the hand still entwined in hers.

"I'm here. I'm not going anywhere." Maura lightly brushed her thumb across the top of Jane's hand.

Jane looked around for a minute. "How long?"

"About eight hours. Your surgery lasted only two hours. You were lucky. The bullet missed every major organ and artery. It didn't take long to extract it and patch you up. Barring complications, you should be just fine."

"I'm sorry," Jane said.

"For what?"

"I always seem to end up in a hospital bed. I'm sorry about that."

"Jane, it wasn't your fault. You saved Jennifer Shelton. I'd prefer it if you stopped using your body as a human shield but I can't fault you for what happened."

"Natalie?"

"I'm sorry Jane. The guys had no choice. She fired her gun."

Jane understood. Given the circumstances she would have done the same thing too. She had just hoped to maybe get Natalie the help she needed.

"Is Ma ok?" Jane knew Angela would be on edge with her getting shot again.

"I'm fine," came Angela's voice from across the room. "I agree with Maura, you need to stop being a human shield. We will be having a conversation about you and Kevlar vests when you are feeling better young lady." Angela's tone was frustrated but purely out of love and concern for her daughter. Maura knew enough to kick the boys out of the room but Angela was not leaving. Instead she was across the room sitting in a recliner just observing the two women interacting with each other.

Maura couldn't help the smile creeping across her face. Jane was in for a very stern lecture from Angela. Maura had listened to it twice now while Jane was in surgery. Jane wasn't going to like it one bit.

"Close your eyes. Sleep." Maura tried to coax Jane back to sleep. Rest was really the best thing for her.

Jane was tired. "You'll be here when I wake up?"

"I'll be here. Always." Maura leaned in and kissed Jane's forehead tenderly again.

"I love you," murmured Jane.

"I love you too. Rest."


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

"_Breaking News: Police shoot out with kidnapping and murder suspect in Public Gardens. Early reports indicate at least one fatality and undetermined number of injured. Stay tuned as we develop this story."_

"_As we continue our coverage of the dramatic rescue of kidnap victim Jennifer Shelton in Boston Public Gardens. Detective Jane Rizzoli, who was instrumental in the rescue of Shelton, has been injured in the shoot out. Detective Rizzoli is listed in serious but stable condition."_

"_As reported earlier we have learned that the Boston Homicide Detective Jane Rizzoli has apparently stopped a second attack on innocent bystanders in less than a week. Rizzoli, if you recall, stopped a possible robbery at a coffee shop on Thursday. Earlier today it had been confirmed that Rizzoli was involved in the standoff with kidnapping and murder suspect Natalie Pennington. Rizzoli was injured in an exchange with the suspect but is listed in serious but stable condition at Mass General."_

"_And now more information on our developing story. As we reported yesterday, Natalie Pennington was gunned down in Public Gardens. Pennington was the chief suspect in two homicides and was said to have had another potential victim kidnapped held hostage inside the Garden near the lake. Boston police responding to the kidnapping were forced to exchange fire with Pennington when she fired at the kidnap victim Jennifer Shelton. Ms. Shelton sustained only minor injuries. However, Detective Jane Rizzoli was shot during the exchange. Detective Rizzoli currently remains hospitalized in stable condition."_

_"As information continues to develop with this investigation there are some shocking discoveries. KNBC has learned that among the items recovered from Pennington's vehicle was an AR-15 rifle with several hundred rounds of ammunition and three other handguns. A .22 was used in the exchange with the Boston police."_

"_We have also learned that Pennington was planning on some sort of assault on Savio Preparatory High School. Motivation behind this planned assault that was foiled by the police is not yet known. There are unofficial reports that Pennington, a former student of Savio, was seeking to avenge the death of her sister Sara Pennington but that information has not been confirmed."_

"_As reported earlier Pennington was found with an AR-15 semi automatic rifle and three handguns in her vehicle. As previously reported it was believed that Pennington was targeting an Open House event at the Savio Prep High School but that assault was foiled by the shoot-out in the Gardens."_

"_We are learning some disturbing details as this case progresses. There are now unconfirmed reports that a manifesto written by Pennington was recovered during the search of her vehicle and that manifesto is said to be highly inflammatory. There are unconfirmed reports that Pennington was attempting to avenge the suicide death of her sister Sara Pennington from five years ago. Investigators are now turning their attention to the circumstances surrounding Sara Pennington's suicide In an effort to understand the motivation behind the shootings and planned assault."_

"_An update on our developing story. As more details come to light it has now been confirmed that the suspect, Natalie Pennington, had intended to attack the Savio Preparatory Open House. Police now confirm that they recovered an AR-15, four handgun and over five hundred rounds of ammunition. Inside sources also say a document written by Pennington was recovered. Our sources, who are not allowed to make official comments, have told this station that the recovered document does explain the rationale behind the murders and the planned assault on the school."_

"_Hard questions are beginning to be asked as more details come to light following the standoff at the Public Gardens. Police have now confirmed that Pennington targeted Savio Prep. Pennington, a former student, has been described as deeply disturbed with a long history of mental instability, treatment and hospitalization. As investigators continue to review the writings left behind by Pennington it is clear that she was attempting to seek revenge against those she felt were responsible for her sister's suicide five years ago."_

"_As details come to light Savio Prep has to deal with some tough questions as allegations of sexual assault and a cover-up start to surface. Savio Prep has released a statement stating they are committed to providing a safe learning environment for their students and have launched an investigation into allegations of an underground culture of competitive sexual conquests and possible sexual assault. Savio Prep insists they are also cooperating fully with official investigations."_

"_A shocking update to our lead story, investigators have found evidence of an underground sex club at Savio Prep. Investigations have unearthed multiple encrypted website pages containing numerous photos and videos of sexual acts being recorded and posted by the students. Federal investigators have seized computers from inside the school and it is being reported that the encrypted websites were maintained and administered by a faculty member at the school. Officials continue to investigate the growing sex scandal which now may include child pornography charges."_

"_A private service was held today for Natalie Pennington whose crime spree and subsequent death sparked a series of investigations into Savio Prep that led to the arrests of Savio Principal Charles Harrington and two faculty members in a child pornography ring. A representative for the Pennington family released a statement expressing their condolences to the families of Brett Alan Jenkins and Randall Jefferson Keyes. The statement admonishes the assault against their daughter Sara allegedly committed by Keyes and Jenkins but states that the allegations should have been a matter for the courts to decide allowing Keyes and Jenkins due process. The Pennington family does not condone the actions of their daughter, Natalie, expressing a wish that all issues involved in this case should have been resolved in a court of law and not in the court of public opinion or a court of vengeance. The family welcomes the continued investigation into the circumstances of Sara's sexual assault and her suicide stating that as difficult as this time is they would like the truth to finally come to light. They requested some privacy as they grieve the loss of both their children and for all those who suffered loss or injury as a result of this tragedy."_

"_Tonight on Piers Morgan, the exclusive first interview with kidnap victim Jennifer Shelton along with her sister former Boston Police Department media liaison Belinda Simmons. An exclusive interview with the sisters that are tied to murder, kidnapping and a shocking teenage sex scandal that has led to the arrest of four school officials, including Principal Harrington, on child pornography charges."_

It had been an absolute media frenzy. Jane had done everything she could to avoid the storm including escaping the city to finish her rehab. The press attention was unbearable and Maura had talked Jane into spending her three weeks leave in New York instead of Boston. Jane was at the heart of one of biggest news stories in Boston. The lead detective on a case that involved murder, kidnapping and a foiled mass murder plot against a school now in the midst of a massive sex abuse/child pornography scandal. There wasn't a media outlet that hadn't tried to make an offer to secure Jane's interview. But Jane being Jane declined all offers.

The press was easy to keep away from the hospital but Jane was released after just two days. Once she was released the press was camped out at her apartment and at the Beacon Hill home of Dr. Isles. Jane was ordered onto medical leave for four weeks. After the first week both Jane and Maura were ready to get away and Jane agreed to finish out her rehab and leave while staying with Maura in New York City. The security in the building for Maura's penthouse kept the New York press at bay and the escape had been good for both women.

Jane had no desire to answer questions about what had happened. She had no desire to be a part of the frenzy. She explained herself to the ones she needed to. She had given her official statement twice. Once to Cavanaugh. A statement documenting and detailing the actions taken in the investigation into the deaths of Jenkins and Keyes. A statement explaining how Jane had concluded Natalie Pennington's murder site at the Public Gardens and an accurate accounting of what occurred leading up to both her shooting and Natalie's. She didn't leave anything out of the statement she gave to Cavanaugh.

Her second statement was one given to federal investigators. The second statement detailed everything Jane knew about Savio Prep, the website she saw the one time she was able to access it, the conversation she had with her lieutenant and the principal plus what was told to her by Sara Pennington. Jane outlined everything she knew to the federal investigators. She held nothing back. She wasn't evasive or defensive. She wasn't looking for forgiveness or absolution. She wanted one thing and one thing only. She wanted the truth to be told.

In the end that was all she could do. She couldn't change the past. She couldn't magically change how she reacted to Sara's information. Nor could she fix what she saw as her weak attempt at follow-up to what she knew. But she could tell the truth. Accept responsibility for the things she did or didn't do. Accept the consequences of her failures. For within the truth Jane had hope. Hope for impacting the future. Hope for changing the status quo. Hope that the lessons needed to be learned from all of this would be learned and reacted to. Jane had hope for real change.

Her time with the federal investigators was hard. But she answered every question asked as best she could. Her frankness and candor had impressed the investigators. They found it a refreshing change to discuss issues with someone who did not try to skirt their culpability or get defensive about the choices they made. Jane was deemed to be a credible witness. In an off the record conversation Jane was told that BPD was considering making changes to some of their mandatory reporting and investigation policies regardless of undercover investigation statuses.

Given Jane's aversion to the media and press coverage about the entire ordeal, it was an unusual circumstance to find Jane sitting down to watch a news program. She had avoided the TV and papers in the last two weeks filling her TV watching time with sports, movies or documentaries Maura had wanted to watch. But tonight was different. Tonight she needed to see what Belinda had learned from everything that had transpired and what she was going to say. She had no idea how the interviews were going to go but she was compelled to watch.

8:00 pm came and Jane turned on the program. As the opening credits began to play Jane's attention was fully on the two women sitting in studio with Morgan. The only outside factor she was even remotely aware of was the proximity of Maura. Jane's hand was wound tightly into Maura's and Jane was sitting curled into Maura on the couch. She still found that any tactile touch with Maura grounded her. Maura allowed for as much body contact as possible accepting the weight of Jane leaning into her. Maura was determined to continue to be for Jane what she had been since this all had started: her rock.

Jane watched as Morgan began to ask a few warm up questions. Soft pitches to relax both Jennifer and Belinda. Given the quick response by both Jane was fairly certain the first few questions were scripted. He was slowly taking Jennifer through the kidnapping and her rescue but had not yet walked down the path of what Natalie's motivation was in targeting Jennifer and he had not touched what Belinda's involvement in the entire ordeal. That was what Jane wanted to hear. She needed to know what truth Belinda was going to tell.

"Belinda, you play more than a supportive sisterly role in all of this. You actually have been involved in the aspects of all of this at various stages from the beginning. What has impacted you the most from what has transpired?"

Jane felt herself inch closer to the TV. This was going to be the moment Jane would get her answers. Belinda was quiet for a moment as if thinking about the best way to answer that question. She then took a deep breath and began to deliver her answer.

"I think what has impacted me the most has been the painful realization that all of this could have been avoided. There are so many tragic consequences layered through this whole ordeal that never had to happen."

"Explain that please," Morgan encouraged.

"All of this started because something very tragic happened to a young girl. Something that never should happen to anyone. Something that could have been prevented at several points before it occurred. But more than that, what happened to this young girl after the events was absolutely inexcusable. How things were handled cost, very unnecessarily, the lives of four people and will be carried as a burden for countless others for years to come.

"Sara Pennington was attacked and sexually assaulted. She never did anything to encourage that to happen. She didn't deserve for that to happen to her. She fell victim to two boys who valued status and popularity more than valuing a human being. They took from Sara what they wanted without thinking or caring about the devastating consequences she would suffer. Those two boys were wrong in what they did. Wrong in action. Wrong in justification. They perpetrated a heinous crime.

"But they had help. They had someone who created a ruse to trap Sara. They had someone who betrayed Sara's belief in friendship and goodness. That betrayal is something Jennifer will have to live with for the rest of her life.

"They had someone to lie for them. Someone who knew and understood what they did but instead of helping hold them accountable to the wrong that was done that someone chose to help them hide from responsibility. Someone chose personal gain over doing the right thing. Someone who chose a lie over the truth. I will have to live with that for the rest of my life.

"They had a community full of people who found it easier to ignore the plight of this innocent girl than to admit their perfect world may not be so perfect. A community who all too quickly vilified a girl who was brave enough to try to call out the wrongs- not just for herself but in an attempt to call out the wrongs suffered by others- only to see that bravery mocked and dismissed. A community that found it easier to embrace the lie rather than accept the truth. Each and every person who dismissed or demeaned Sara Pennington because it was the easier path to travel will have to live with that for the rest of their lives.

"So what has impacted me the most has been the slow realization that we live in a society that puts too little stock in virtue and truth and too big a premium on self-preservation and deceit."

Jane took the remote and turned off the TV. She had seen everything she needed to see. She leaned back and rested into Maura who pulled Jane into her arms. They settled into each other and into a comfortable silence. After several minutes of silence Jane finally spoke.

"She told the right truth."

**A/N Tomorrow's chapter will conclude this particular story. Your thoughts and reviews have been beyond amazing. Thank you to all who read this story. For the Guest reviewers who never seem to let me respond back individually….thanks for your postings!**


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

Jane looked out across the skyline at the view from the penthouse balcony she had called home for the last three weeks. The view was amazing. Lights and skyscrapers danced across the top while a garden paradise beckoned below. Jane was surprised she had taken to the city as quickly as she had. But it wasn't home. Boston was home and Jane was ready to return home.

It was their last night in New York. Jane's medical leave of absence was coming to an end and according to everyone back home the press had finally started to back off and focus on other stories. The shift seemed to follow the fallout from the arrests of the principal, and IT lab tech and a history teacher in a child pornography ring and away from Jane's involvement in Natalie Pennington's death. No one could guarantee her that the press would not attempt to contact her once her returned but it was clear that the frenzy had died down. It was time to go home. It was time to get back to work for both Jane and Maura. It was time for life to move forward.

As Jane started to think about moving forward her thoughts immediately went to Maura. The thought of a future with Maura, truly with Maura, was still such a new concept for Jane. The last month had been anything but normal for the two. While Jane deeply regretted the circumstances that had pulled the two of them to New York, she was absolutely grateful for the time they had together. While the development of their relationship didn't seem to evolve on a 'normal' path, their relationship had evolved nonetheless.

Four weeks ago Jane had found herself in the seemingly impossible situation of professing her love for Maura. To Maura. And in an even more improbable twist of fate, Maura had confessed to her feelings of love for Jane. To Jane. What Jane had never dared to allow herself to hope for had suddenly presented itself in a manner that was more than Jane felt she had the right to ask for.

Her weekend getaway with Maura to Laconia had been meant to be just that. A simple getaway with her best friend and a chance for Maura to experience a fair for the first time. Jane had wanted to share a part of her childhood with Maura. But somehow while standing up in her uncle's boat on Lake Winnepesaukee they had found their way to each other. To a love for each other. To a possibility of a life together. And to a first kiss that still made Jane go weak in the knees each time she allowed herself to think about it.

The weekend signaled the start of their relationship. They would always be friends but they were transitioning into something more. More than friends. More than lovers. Jane and Maura came away from that magical weekend well on their way towards developing that relationship. In a perfect world, the women would have been allowed to discover and explore the newness of the changes occurring in their relationship. But the world wasn't perfect and their lives didn't exist in a vacuum.

The weekend had given them a good start. They had made love for the first time the night they returned to Boston. Jane allowed herself to linger on the images of that night as they passed through her mind. The passion she felt. The feel of Maura's body. The feel of every inch of Maura she was allowed for the first time to explore with her hands, her lips and her tongue. The reaction from Maura to Jane's exploration. Jane's reaction to each touch from Maura's hands, her lips and her tongue. Jane remembered every moment of the first night they had spent as lovers. It was a night she would never forget.

And then life reared its ugly head. Natalie Pennington happened. On one hand the case was simple. A double homicide, kidnapping and mass murder plot investigated, detected and resolved with the recovery of the kidnap victim and the throrting of the attack on a school. The resolution of the case resulted in the death of the suspect, an injured investigating detective and a secondary investigation into a sex scandal at a private high school. But on the other hand the case was extremely complicated. Complicated because of the emotions involved. The case struck to the core of one of Jane's biggest emotional burdens she carried.

Guilt over inaction. Guilt for consequences to the choices she had made. A subtle but persistent belief that she had failed to protect someone she had the ability to protect. The manifestation of that failure into an underlying core belief that none of the things she did in her career were good enough to make up for the times she had failed. Each good act, solved case, life saved just served to remind her of the ones she couldn't solve or save.

The case, the fallout and her injury were all thrown at Jane in the midst of trying to start her new relationship with Maura. Something unexpected but wonderful was happening in the midst of all the chaos playing out. Jane was never good with the emotional aspects of her life. She knew how she felt but always had difficulties expressing her feelings comfortably and after her encounters with Hoyt she had difficulties accepting and trusting others.

Maura had always been exempt from Jane's emotional aversions. But somehow quite unexpectedly for Jane, Maura had become a beacon of stability for her when she needed it the most. Jane had never felt as vulnerable and emotionally exposed as she did when she allowed herself to tell Maura about the history behind Sara and Natalie. Jane had feared Maura would judge her or reject her for the mistakes she had made in her past. She had been petrified that the moment she was going to lose her when Maura discovered her short comings. She feared Maura would run away when she discovered Jane's unworthiness.

But Maura hadn't run. Quite the opposite actually. Maura embraced her. Accepted her. Saw her. And loved her. Maura hadn't waivered. Hadn't judged. Hadn't second guessed Jane's actions or motivations. Instead, she stood her ground and listened. Defended. Understood. And offered Jane insight and opinion without judgment. All of that had meant more to Jane than could ever possibly explain. Maura had told Jane loving someone was to trust that person would stay during the bad. Jane hadn't expected the bad to show up less than two days into their new romance. But it had. And Maura stayed.

The last three weeks had been relaxed and enjoyable. Jane's injury from the shooting had been relatively minor considering her previous injuries. Jane's rehab was mostly allowing for muscle and tissue to heal and minor physical therapy to strengthen the surrounding muscles. Jane had initially attempted to get medical clearance just three days after the shooting. But the break in the Savio inquiry and the media frenzy it produced convinced Jane to agree to a full four weeks leave of absence.

It was Maura's idea to go to New York. She had suggested it the first night the new vans attempted to camp outside both Jane and Maura's homes. Jane's unease and stress level at the vulturistic nature of the press and the desire not to subject Maura to the scrutiny from them had Jane agreeing to the temporary relocation with New York without a fight. Jane knew Maura owned several homes in the US and abroad so escaping to New York just seemed like a reasonable option. Maura had plenty of vacation time and had arranged to be with Jane for the entirety of her medical leave.

That action managed to confirm to the others the change to the dynamic of Jane and Maura's relationship. Angela had been told by Jane the morning of the Natalie Pennington incident. Korsak and Frost suspected after watching Maura watch over Jane in her first few hours in the hospital. They had seen Maura watch over Jane in a hospital before but both had realized that this time had been different. There was something in Maura's eyes that gave her away to both. Frankie realized the change when Maura had kicked everyone out of Jane's room when they inadvertently wake her up. Her aggressive protection tipped him off. Tommy needed to be told. As did Maura's parents.

But everyone, Jane's family, Maura's family and Jane's partners in crime, everyone was supportive, accepting and truly happy for the two. Each in their own way had come to believe that the two women belonged together and made each other happy. That had been all that mattered to any of them. There was no big announcement. No formal coming out. Just an understanding that Jane and Maura were in fact now Jane and Maura. That was all that was needed.

So for three weeks Jane and Maura had been able to be together. Away from interruptions and distractions. Away from work and family. Three weeks to spend time together getting to know each other. Not as the friends they were but as the lovers they were becoming. As intimates. Learning about the physical needs and desires of each other. But also learning about the emotional needs for each other. Three weeks of exploring the depth of their dreams and as well as their insecurities. Where they were alike or where they were different. How those likes and differences could compliment the other. It was three weeks of growth that both women came to feel utterly blessed to have. But it was also time that had come to an end.

Jane's attention was called back to reality by the vibration of her cell phone.

_On my way back. Mother says hello. M  
Give her my regards. ETA? J  
15 mins. Did you decide about dinner? M  
We can figure it out when you get home. J  
I love you! M  
I love you more! J_

She walked back into the penthouse and picked up the house phone awaiting an answer. "Ms. Jane?" Jeffrey greeted wanting to ensure that it was Jane.

"Yes Jeffrey, it's Jane. Dr. Isles is on her way back."

"Yes Ma'am. I know what to do," he said. Jane could hear the smile in his tone.

"Thank you Jeffrey."

"Anything for Dr. Isles," he responded and hung up.

About twenty minutes later the house phone rang once and then it went silent. Jane couldn't help but smile. It was the signal. She just knew Jeffrey was all excited to be a part of a clandestine affair. She looked around and was content that everything was setup and ready.

Maura opened the front door to the penthouse and called out to Jane. "Jane, I'm home. And I'm starving." She continued to call out as she walked through the foyer and into the living room area. "We need to decide on dinner…" and she stopped speaking when she got to the entrance of the dining room. What was in front of her both surprised and delighted her.

Lights turned down. Dining room table set. Candles lit. The staging and the ambiance was just perfect. The first aromas of what would be dinner hit Maura and completed the picture in front of her. She couldn't stop the smile that was now spreading across her face. "Jane?" she called out looking around.

"Balcony," was hollered back.

Maura headed out to the balcony and was greeted with a glass of wine and a tender kiss from Jane. While Maura took the wine she wanted more from the kiss but Jane had pulled away from her. Maura sighed in frustration.

"Hi," was all Jane offered.

"Hi? Is that all you have to say to me?" she asked and Jane couldn't help but notice the twinkle in her beautiful hazel eyes.

"No. I have plenty to say to you as a matter of fact. But for now, hi," and she gave a second tender but reserved kiss smiling a cocky, gloating smile as she pulled back a second time before Maura could get even close to level of intimacy she desired.

"What has gotten into you?" Maura asked but not really caring for the question to be answered.

"It's our last night here and I didn't want to spend it around anyone else but you. So I cooked. I hope you don't mind."

"No. I will never mind the opportunity to spend the night alone with you."

Jane smiled at that comment. Before Maura could say anything else Jane reached out her hand quietly requesting Maura's. Maura placed her hand in Jane's without hesitation. She let Jane lead them both closer to the balconies railing. They both rested against the railing both instinctively turning in towards each other.

Jane started. "I love you." Simple. Declarative. Heartfelt.

"I love you too." Effortless. Sincere. Complete.

"Maur, I love you. I've never been more sure about anything in my whole life. I could spend every single day of my life listing the things I love about you and I would never run out of reasons why. We go home tomorrow. Home together and that thought alone makes me so happy I can't even begin to describe it. But I'm a little worried about going home. I'm worried that once we get home we will fall into old routines and old habits and we will forget what it feels like to just be in the same space together. Without interruption. Just us. The absolute very best of us.

"I don't want our jobs, our families, our friends, our lives to interfere with the magic that is us. I hated the reason why we came here. I hated the fact that I made you run away. I hated pulling you into my insecurities the way that I did. But at the same time, I'm so grateful that we came here. That we had this time together. Away from everyone. It has been just you and me for three glorious weeks and I will miss that."

Maura went to say something but the look on Jane's face made her stop. Jane wasn't finished talking.

"I know what I want. I want you. All of you. In my life in every way. I believe you want that too. Maur I can't imagine spending even one day apart from you. Not being able to see you. Hear you. Touch you. I've come to believe that I can't exist without you. You are a part of me. As essential to my survival as water or air. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

"But I need to make sure you understand something. I need to make sure you know how I got to this place. This moment standing in front of you telling you how much I love you. I want you to fully understand my side of the story of us because it has been an incredible journey and we are only at our beginning."

Any thought Maura had about speaking completely left her. She stood listening in wonder to what Jane was telling her. Eyes, mind and heart all wide open and pulling in every word. Every look. Every sound.

"My journey to us started where I think all relationships should start. It started at friendship. Maura you are my best friend. I remember thinking how sad it was that you had never had a best friend growing up but Maura I was the fool. I was the fool for thinking I had friends before you. When the truth was I didn't have friends either. Not in the true sense of the word. In the end it turns out that you and I were a lot alike in that respect. We both had acquaintances. But not friends.

"I didn't understand what the word 'friend' really meant until you. Because of you I was finally able to figure out how to not only be a friend but to have a friend in my life. Because of you I finally learned what it felt like to trust someone completely. To count on someone implicitly. Because of your friendship I was able to let you see all of my vulnerabilities and weaknesses. You were the only one. The only one to see and know the complete me. Everyone else just got pieces of me. But you got it all and I somehow didn't fear that. I now understand the reason behind that. You are the only one because I love you.

"Our friendship easily transitioned into love. It didn't take any time at all. But at first it wasn't a romantic love. It was a familial love. It was easy to love you. Your kindness. Your generosity. Your intelligence. Your drive. Your desire to always do what was right. Your innocence. Your candor. Your inability to lie. Your heart. Your beauty. Your vision. Your appreciation for life. Your openness. You. All of you. How could I not?

"But it wasn't a romantic love. Not in the beginning. But my love for you did evolve into a romantic love. As I have thought about this I am of the belief that it happened over an extended period of time. I didn't wake up one morning and suddenly find myself in love with you. Those feelings developed slowly over time. My realization of being in love with you, however, was instantaneous. There was one moment. A single moment when I became aware of the fact that I was in love with you. It's a moment I will never forget.

"The day you found out Colin was your half-brother you were so upset. I just wanted to help you. Comfort you. We went to the park and I let you talk about your search for your adoptive parents and your desire to have a sibling. I remember having this overwhelming urge to pull you into my arms and take all your pain and sadness away. I wanted to make sure you understood that you weren't alone. And then I realized. I wanted to be the one to make you feel loved. Wanted. Secure. I looked at you and I just knew that I wanted to keep the world from hurting you. From disappointing you. I wanted to be the one to protect you. In that moment, I knew I was in love with you and I wanted nothing less than forever with you.

"I have wondered a few times over the years if I should have just said something to you that day. But I was afraid. Afraid to let myself believe I deserved you. Afraid you didn't feel the same. Afraid if I said anything I'd chase you away. I was trying to protect you and keep you from getting hurt. Somewhere in that moment I decided I would hurt you if I said anything. So I vowed never to risk hurting you. And I let that fear cost us time together. For that, I am sorry.

"But every minute of every day we have spent together has helped get me to right here. My journey led me to right here standing in front of you with what feels like a lifetime of memories with you already but knowing that there are so many more to be had. Together. You are my life Maura. My past, my present and my future. I love you."

Tears had slowly, but steadily flowed down Maura's cheeks as Jane had spoken. For someone who didn't do the emotional aspects of life well, Jane was in complete command and control of what she was saying. It wasn't so much Jane's words that had moved Maura, although they were eloquent. It was the openness Jane showed as she delivered them. Their love, their romance, had given Jane an inner confidence Maura hadn't detected before. But she saw it now.

The moment was still a bit overwhelming to her but Maura was desperate to find the right response. The right words to share with Jane her journey to where they both now stood together. The right words to make Jane understand what she felt. But the woman with a genius IQ was rendered speechless. Too much was running through her head and her heart. Just simply too much. But she needed to say something. She couldn't let the moment pass without some small acknowledgement that she understood exactly what Jane was trying to tell her. So she took a deep breath and responded the only way she knew how.

"Marry me."

**A/N Thanks for taking the time to read this story. The response was more than I ever expected. All the reviews and PMs were greatly appreciated. Until next time…..**


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